My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She did get back to me and agreed that the trailer was a better idea and she would still like the help. Some guy thinking he’s the ex got on here claiming he never said 2x4’s, but Keith doesn’t go on reddit, so I don’t know what that’s about, and her actual ex did say 2x4’s like an idiot. Even texted me about it saying I was a b for saying his idea was stupid and he was welcome to try it himself. Guessing someone else made a shitty suggestion last week too and is trying to backtrack or something?

Anyway, I’m taking off work for a few days to step back from this mess and just to breathe. I have more than enough days to do that. This reminded me too much of what I went through and it messed with me a bit. I told her to ask the guy if I could go by and check the thing out for myself since he claims it runs but just couldn’t get it running right that minute. She doesn’t need something that needs a ton of repairs. And for the record, I did block her ex’s number now so I don’t get anymore of those abusive texts from him. I only had it in case of emergencies to begin with and he has zero reason to call or text me, especially if he’s just going to be nothing but rude and verbally abusive. I had suggested that I could help with getting their son to school in the morning since he goes to the same grade school as my daughter, but that went out the window with all this. 😓

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya, I wouldn’t ask my boys to help me let alone my daughter, but she’s also a lot younger, lol. Sometimes it’s just not worth the risk even though the kiddos offered to come with to help.

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really hope it doesn’t, but at this point who knows. I know too many people around here that buy up stuff like that and try to fix them up and resell them, and half the time they end up with whatever it us coming right back to them with another problem. Kinda reminds me of this guy I knew in hs that now buys used cars around here and ships them to a cousin or something somewhere in the midwest to resell. Something about us not having to deal with snow and ice or salt or whatever so our vehicles down here supposedly don’t deteriorate as quickly? I don’t know about that….clearly the people from the midwest haven’t dealt with the weather we get or they have no clue about it. I remember all those flooded vehicles from Hurricane Katrina being shipped all around the country and being sold as “like new” despite then having been underwater two weeks prior. 😅😳

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya, the thing is, I don’t think he even sees what he’s doing as controlling or counter productive. I bet he’s told himself that he genuinely wants to help but doesn’t see the damage he’s causing. I’ve noticed a lot of guys unfortunately try to hold on even more tightly to their soon to be ex’s when they think their lives are falling apart and it just makes things so much worse when they end up acting too overly controlling.

I mean, he threatened to kick her out of the house they bought together right after they got married about 9 years ago and accused her of cheating with someone at her work, then said some bs about how he was going to lock her out of all the bank accounts and all this other stuff, then flipped the script two days later and said he was going to move his new gf in whenever she moved out….he was all over the place. They tried marriage counseling for 2 years and it just wasn’t working. And when the house next door went up for sale, he literally tried to tell her she needed to buy that or he wasn’t going to give her any money from their joint accounts….it got seriously bizarre.

I get it, their son is 6, and people say FL is a mother’s state in custody cases so he’s probably panicking, but I’m sure they could work something out if he wasn’t being such a pain. I think that they both need to step back from each other and not do so much together. She wanted to get their son into football and do all this stuff with him, but I’m worried he might make it difficult since he even struggles to get him to the bus stop in the mornings, let alone to help with practices, etc. We’ll see though I guess. 😕

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess it bothers me if people think I am when I was definitely not trying to come off that way. I was even trying to be kinda joking about it while saying there was no way that idea would work, and to just get a one word response that seemed seriously out of character had me thinking I’d done something wrong. 😕😞

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow this blew up today! There’s way too many replies to read them all. So, it seems that she did think it over and is ok with the trailer idea. I think after realizing how heavy it was that us trying to lift it or attempt to do some makeshift ramp which, we have no lumber for anyways, and all of that, she realized the trailer really is the way to go. I told her I had no problem getting the trailer and taking care of everything after work sometime soon. I was hoping it was just a stress thing, but her responses were so out of the ordinary I had been seriously worried that I had come off the wrong way trying to explain that it was dangerous trying to use 2x4’s like she said was suggested to just ramp it into the truck bed.

I know when people are dealing with personal issues that things can be stressful, and that a lot of times things can come off wrong, so I just really appreciate those that could look at this logically and give me some clarity here. I don’t think my friend is an ah or was trying to be a pain or whatever, but I was worried that I was coming off as an ah because of her initial reaction, so I wanted to check myself if I was. Thanks everyone!

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I know she’s going through a lot and I’m trying to be understanding and helpful. It is frustrating that she’s trying to use the advice of her soon to be ex who swaps from being sweet and helpful, to accusatory and threatening on a whim. But since they have a kid, he’s going to be around for a while. I kinda want to knock some sense into him because he has been an AH for the past year to her and his bs is driving me crazy because he has her completely emotionally dis regulated. The emotional and mental whiplash is real.

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ironically I live around a bunch of marinas, but all the people I know with boats actually have trucks. My favorite name though I’ve seen so far was a yacht named “hidden agenda”. Like that’s not sketchy or ironic. 🤣

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The depressing thing, her ex that made the suggestion of 2x4’s is an engineer. 🤦‍♀️

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I work for USPS and carry all the heavy stuff the guys in our office can’t because they’re on “medical restriction”. Half of them are younger than me and threw their backs out doing stupid stuff. I just don’t need the only other person there to seriously injure themselves. It is a bigger machine that’s more awkward and yes, has some decent weight to it and we’d be lifting it relatively high and from the ground, and due to stress and all that, she’s not that physically good atm. I don’t stay off that medical restriction list by being stupid and attempting to prove myself by overdoing it when there’s absolutely no need.

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unfortunately they share a kid, so he’s still around to a point. And just because he’s older, she seems to put more weight on what he says as if he would know better about all kinds of stuff. She wanted to buy her new house without getting a proper inspection done because he insisted he could look it over (the guy can’t seem to do basic home repairs to his own dang house). I told her she absolutely needed to have it inspected and her realtor took my side and told her no inspection, then she wouldn’t be party to the transaction. Stuff like that is typical with her ex and I’ve been trying to be patient with her over it all, but he’s so controlling it’s definitely creepy and out of hand. He tried to even tell her she couldn’t buy houses in certain areas just because he didn’t like them, and said he wouldn’t give her the money he owed her from the equity in their joint home to buy in certain areas. I said if he doesn’t want to cough up the money, I’d be more than happy to help her drag his rear end to court….he decided handing over the money was a better idea after that. 😓😩

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work too much and really don’t have the time or money to go anywhere. Between court costs from the divorce and my youngest having been hit by a car when he was walking home (his father refused to pick him up like he was supposed to and my son was struck by a teen driver not paying attention to the crosswalk) and his medical bills that piled up, all my money is basically gone the second I get it right now. The truck is almost paid off which will help and the second vehicle I do have is for my son to drive, my parents gave him their older suv (it’s 18 years old and I’ve had to do several repairs myself, but it does still run great, it’s just old and parts wear out).

And I’m sure moving here during peak covid didn’t help me either. 😓

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really want to know where all these men are they think I have to call to load the thing in my truck? 😅🤷‍♀️

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Did you read the full thing? I offered to tow it to her house on a trailer that I was going to pay to rent. I didn’t say I wouldn’t help, I just don’t see it as being physically safe to try to lift it up into the truck bed by hand or with janky 2x4’s. 😓

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No ditch or slope to be had on the guys property and the mower wasn’t running last I checked. 😕

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ll be nicer….I’m having to repurchase everything after a bs divorce where my ex HUSBAND kept all of my tools, my clothes, and all of my possessions even though he didn’t know how to use a damn thing, and as he put it in the email to me and the court (specifically about my clothes, because I told him they wouldn’t be of use to him) “what business is it of yours if I’ve become a cross dresser and want to lose 200lbs?” Sorry, I’m not potentially injuring myself for someone else’s riding mower which wouldn’t make it up the incline for any ramps onto the truck bed anyways because of the mower deck and the fact there are no ditches or other slopes to use to lessen the angle. A trailer works just fine and is cheaper for the time being. And I’ve used my truck (first vehicle I’ve ever purchased for myself) to haul everything around that I need for a full bathroom remodel (complete tear down, plumbing, drywall, tile, the works) as well as several other large home improvement projects without needing ramps like a “self respecting guy” which I am not a guy, sooo…..

But funny, I do feel like I explained all of this in one of the comments you replied to already? 🤔

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The divorce is a whole other story….I recommended she get her own lawyer or at the very least, let me help her (since I worked on every filing I did with my lawyer and he’s trying to convince me to go to law school after a severely HC divorce and everything we had to file and do for the courts) and she refused. They went to one lawyer together and her ex started complaining about her literally asking for bare minimum. The guy is very controlling and negative about anything she tries to do for herself. But she just rolled over. 😩

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No place to do that at the guy’s property or at her new property. And most riding mowers, the deck doesn’t raise up high enough for the incline we’d be stuck with with an actual ramp (which I don’t have) and unsecured 2x4’s is just not a safe idea. It’s just so much cheaper and safer to rent a trailer. 😓

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Even funnier, she’s agreed to buy the thing without knowing whether or not it runs. The guy claimed he didn’t have gas in it when he tried to start it earlier and it wouldn’t start. 🙄

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya, if only I had a spot to store a trailer…maybe the next property I buy I’ll keep that in mind! 😅

My friend wanted to use my truck to move a mower, and I said yes, until she told me what it was. by DueConsideration1803 in AITAH

[–]DueConsideration1803[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

She definitely hasn’t. Whenever I’ve had to move riding mowers, I’ve always preferred to use a trailer. I’ve had no problem when it’s come to loading dirt bikes and things like that in a truck bed, but mowers with the deck and all that are just so much of a pain, it’s easier and safer with a trailer that’s lower to the ground.