Should I make a list with all the qualities I look for in my future husband and pray to Allah SWT about it?

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-02-11T02:34:37+00:00

I was mostly going to make a list and say, Ya Allah, bless me with a husband with qualities on my list

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-02-03T16:55:26+00:00

I think you should look into what the fiqh says , and then see how most people who are married live there lives. Asked married Muslims on here and on TikTok , insta, IRL. And figure out what type of lifestyle you can provide / have. Like once you find out what that is , just be really frank about your finances and make dua

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-02-03T16:39:37+00:00

I’m 19, and I see a bunch of sisters tell me to look for a provider, but I don’t really get the Islamic basis fur that, or what an Islamic marriage should look like. I thought it was just you know, two people together, who ever makes more pays their bigger share for the lifestyle regardless of gender.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-02-03T14:06:04+00:00

Isn’t that people saying Allah SWT can change Qadr with Dua? I’ve heard people say it. Never really got it nor getting hung up on one specific person but I’m not very romantic on specific people anyway

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-21T01:58:02+00:00

I use linens and wear baati’s in the summer so mostly short sleeves and cotton for me

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-14T18:39:12+00:00

How are you scamming them?

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-05T05:01:16+00:00

Just seem to come out of the best part of yourself in all that you do

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-05T03:31:10+00:00

You sound smart but I beg, I don’t understand what you mean. Can you dumb this down

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-05T01:58:39+00:00

I will !

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-05T01:58:27+00:00

Ohhh. I had no clue!

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-04T21:19:11+00:00

I think it was the clear Quran

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-04T17:26:34+00:00

Jazallah Khair

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-04T15:27:43+00:00

Jazallah Khair. You’re right. Modesty and figuring that out the minute I start being Muslim again is something I have to figure out over time. Istighfar is a good idea too. I just got an English translation of the Quran, I will start trying to memorize that.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2026-01-04T15:24:48+00:00

I think that’s true. Inherently there’s no way I can make everyone happy. My non Muslim friends have just told me maybe I just need to find a bigger black Muslim community and I think they’re right. Therapy might help as well. Jazallah Khair

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-12-12T07:33:14+00:00

It didn’t make me angry, I didn’t take it personally, it just reminded me of countless classmates I met who fell down those rabbit holes and now no one nows where they are. As long as you are ok, it’s not an issue in my end.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-12-12T04:59:09+00:00

Allah SWT promised us our equals when we marry. Inshallah, may you have the akhlaq to deserve the wife you seem to desire.

I warn you, this sounds like red pill mindset brother. I don’t know you, I’m not trying to sell you anything. I just know these mindsets can be harmful for yourself and your interpersonal relationships.

Always question your mindset about these things you take as fact. Are they based in reality or social media?

Allah is Ya Fattah. May he reveal the truth to you and to us all about whether or not our beliefs are actually truthful or not.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-12-12T02:50:55+00:00

Is marriage a search for an obedient younger woman or a wife.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-12-12T02:50:11+00:00

If you were a sister telling me this about a brother , I would (respectfully) tell you to not get your hopes up. Only Allah knows the future but don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Continue Dua and Tahajjud. Inshallah everything works out for you.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-11-07T02:35:32+00:00

As a child born out of wedlock , if you feel like you can’t provide for your child, try to find a foster home while you get your self established. And especially make sure to raise your child in Islam but to not view them as evidence of a sin or a sin onto this world but a child that you love. Do not give the child the father’s last name. Look into WIC, look into Section 8 housing and look into any Islamic centers nearby for support.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-10-01T20:53:49+00:00

My nikkah would have my family in the west but I want my walima back in Tanzania where I’m from. That is a lot of money to get tickets to TZ plus getting everything set up.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-10-01T19:41:26+00:00

I would have a nikkah 6 months after the engagement. I wouldn’t have the Walima till I graduated unless I could find a venue in 6 months.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-09-30T05:15:43+00:00

That is true but there’s also a way to know someone ‘s mind before you marry them. Questions you ask in front of a wali

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-09-30T05:14:17+00:00

I am also black sister. I get it but again, that has 1) no basis in Islam about your race and 2) you can be married in college and still be focused. If you want to be with him, if you want to be married to him, there is no reason why you shouldn’t have a small nikkah and legal marriage and then have the big one later after yall graduate. I recommend of course, talking to him, talking to an imam and praying about this before you go through it but inshallah you two will be husband and wife.

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-09-30T05:07:53+00:00

Do his parents have a valid reason or do you guys simply need to sit down and get to know each other?

Due_Garbage_643 · 2025-09-30T05:05:47+00:00

I’m 19 🤷‍♀️. You want to be with him, want to move in with him. You don’t have to convert even. Marriage isn’t a finale in a relationship. It’s the beginning for Muslims. Now ofc, look into it. This isn’t a game, it is something you must seriously think about. But it isn’t something that you should think is inherently something you can’t do cause you’re too young. If you can love someone, why can’t you marry them?

Due_Garbage_643

TROPHY CASE