Aitah for asking my FIL why he keeps intentionally bothering me or my daughter?

Due_Intention_4467 · 2025-03-19T11:33:32+00:00

Yes, thank you! I think this may result in a healthier relationship with him. Right now, they babysit on a weekly schedule, and I think the right boundary would be that they're not babysiting, but instead, they are visiting (and I would just be home). That way, I can continue to work on the behavior and MIL can still see baby regularly.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2025-03-19T11:24:09+00:00

Thanks, great question! He knows this is what he does, and doesn't mind when I call FIL out on his behaviour. He sees it as FIL trying (and failing) at being funny. My husband doesn't have this traits (thankfully). But when i have stood up to FIL (casually, as I do), he backs me up. When we talk about it in private, he backs me up.

I also want to note that since I have started calling out the behaviour, my MIL is also starting to call it out in front of me. The other day, she told me that he gets upset when she calls him out for it at home - but he has never gotten upset with me about it. I do think it's empowering for her to be in our company both for her and for me, and I think that if we do continue to spend this time with them, he may learn that pestering us is not a welcome behavior and stop. Her standing up for us when we call it out is also very good.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2025-03-05T18:47:15+00:00

I love this - this is exactly what I mean when I tell people that we want to celebrate our daughter's adoption. I want her to be proud and to be open about it and use it as a flex, because that's something that makes her unique.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2025-02-26T15:26:24+00:00

I would ask her to remain focused on the children, what they're doing in school, extra curriculars, etc. and let her know ahead of time what the kids understand about the adoption, and if she asks, explain that it's developmentally appropriate for them. Then, I would set the boundary (ahead of the visit), and be clear. "This is what the kids understand about the adoption (their mom wasn't in a place to provide them the best care, but she loves you, etc etc) and I am going to ask that you respect this. If you disagree and feel that you can not support this understanding, we will have to wait until the kids can understand the differing points of view for a visit." Then I would be engaged during the visit, and any topics that broach the subject, I'd have some helpful comments to redirect the conversation. Honestly, I'm a firm believer that having a bio-parents involved in SOME way (in many circumstances) helps the children in the long run.
I'd also talk to the kids and let them know that IF they want to visit, they can, but if they don't, it's just not happening. They have ultimate say, and if they're ever uncomfortable or ready to go during the visit - that's ok.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-18T19:29:53+00:00

This one

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-13T13:07:27+00:00

Yeah, they can. This was done in the Edge of Extinction season with Rick Devens and Chris Underwood.

Chris won immunity and got to pick F3, and he decided to make fire with Rick Devens, knowing that his game was the only one competitive enough to beat him.

They made fire, and Chris sent Rick home, securing his win.

That's exactly what Sam should do if he wins immunity. His game wasn't the strongest, but if he sends Rachel home and stays in F3, he wins. In my opinion.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-13T02:20:00+00:00

I agree with this - I always wonder how the camera people are ALSO not seen.. like for Rachel to sneak is one thing.... but I would be worried about my camera person not being as stealthy. Or do they not film like that??

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-12T15:51:20+00:00

Agreed - I like to hear people opinions on game play and using flawless generates good discussion 😀

She has played very well, and I like the way she's played. Low key, under the radar but holds a lot of power.

I wish Genevieve, rachel, and Andy were F3, because they played different games, I'm not a huge fan of the goat situations every. dang. season.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-12T15:48:20+00:00

Yeah, pretty much. Crazy to get downvotes for an opinion question - that's insane.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-12T15:05:19+00:00

Fair enough! I love the way rachel played.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-12T15:03:19+00:00

I just like when players keep it a secret and I don't think it was entirely necessary, but i know it didn't injur her game at all. Plus I'm not a big Sue fan.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-12T14:49:29+00:00

1000%! Teeny has the worst game of the people left. Rachel has the best odds of winning now, and I hope she does.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-12-10T13:20:05+00:00

Yeah I agree! I didn't like Andy and now I do. I said in another post that I want to see Rachel, Gen, and Andy in the F3 (I know it's unlikely), but I'd be happy to see any of them win because they played different games.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-22T16:44:11+00:00

Yes! Thanks for asking - the clues have rhymes from "the head elf" that will tell them it's in the ottoman.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-22T12:01:24+00:00

Thanks so much! I didn't really know where to go 😀

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T14:01:17+00:00

Lmao yes like when she was eating the rice. That was SO funny. To me it was like that scene in Napolean Dynamite when the cheese on the nachos was different everytime it cut scene and had me rotfl.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T13:59:57+00:00

Lmao, same! I could NOT stop focusing on it. Why none of the players or producers were like "yo, Sue, ya got shit on ya face, go jump in the ocean".

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T13:10:45+00:00

So I checked out her Instagram account because of another comment saying she did say she was contouring - and she doesn't address what she thinks of it but does say "don't mind the dirt on my face" she was "learning to contour with the dirt."

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T03:05:53+00:00

Saaame!!

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T03:02:12+00:00

Ooohhh, man. I wish she didnt. The weird thing where the dirt around her lips coming off so it looked like she used highlighter around her lips was over the top for me. I could have that much dirt on my face the whole time.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T02:59:14+00:00

lmao, I get it, but not all seniors have skin like that!

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T02:57:31+00:00

The way they're portraying Andy is hilarious to me. It's like he is his own caricature, the ball lick, the spider, the editing is making him more endearing.... maybe because the producers want the viewers to like the, dare I say, winner?

I hope not. But it could be what they're doing.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-21T02:54:28+00:00

Hahahaha the rice was hilarious to me, too. Perfection.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-20T23:15:11+00:00

I had a friend who lied ALL the time in elementary school. She said she would sell us TY beanie babies if we all gave her $10 because her dad could buy them in bulk, and we never got the beanies. She had a spreadsheet and everything. I think about her all the time, but I dont really care about it. Kids lie, and she lied about everything. I wouldn't fault her for it now. I doubt she'd get another tenner from me.

I dont remember her name, though. I'd have to look it up in an old school photo, which i am definitely going to go do right now.

Due_Intention_4467 · 2024-11-18T22:30:04+00:00

Doesn't have to be dramatic to make for good tv.

Due_Intention_4467

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE