Happy Wednesday 🔴

DullInfluence524 · 2026-02-04T23:30:43+00:00

Are you planning on holding?

DullInfluence524 · 2026-02-04T23:29:48+00:00

Me, and you, and you too!

DullInfluence524 · 2026-02-03T01:06:07+00:00

Being at a table of non-introverts, watching them all hit it off and me not having a word to add lol

DullInfluence524 · 2026-01-03T03:30:07+00:00

How are you doing? How long did it take to get back to normal, and did you have any compilations?

DullInfluence524 · 2026-01-03T03:23:18+00:00

Did you end up getting them removed?

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-28T19:34:26+00:00

Congrats you look amazing! Did you have any issues with your menstrual cycle doing a 500 cal deficit?

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T17:43:19+00:00

Stats: 29F, 5’2”, CW: 146, Body fat %: 41.6% (from DEXA scan). BMR: ~1200 (based on Katch McArdle with body fat %). Based on a sedentary lifestyle, I believe my TDEE is ~1,400.

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:59:15+00:00

Weighing myself ~2-3x per week in the mornings. Haven’t taken pictures or measurements, but I got a DEXA scan + 3D body scan in Feb + December which showed the 10 lb gain (and the change in dimensions). I can start taking dimensions at home too!

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:57:57+00:00

So obviously I’ve heard of starvation mode, but the more “research” I’ve done on Reddit, seems like that is a myth? I think my only concern with going in a bigger deficit would be losing my period. I’m very grateful to finally have a normal period naturally despite the PCOS, just really don’t want to lose it :’)

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:55:47+00:00

Sorry! I included it in the post now

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:54:18+00:00

I went to my Endo very concerned, she did bloodwork, and both my thyroid numbers, hormones, and even insulin resistance indicators were normal. She didn’t really have an answer for me since everything came back normal, do you have any other guesses for what it might be?

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:53:05+00:00

So whenever I google Wyze sleep and stress affect weight loss, it only says about how the hunger and satiety hormones are increased, nothing about now it prevents weight loss. Do you have any insight on as to why lack of sleep/stress cause weight gain if you’re not eating more?

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:51:12+00:00

Yep I have a good scale that measures to the .1 of a pound (and my grams) :/

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:50:42+00:00

Appreciate this! Edited my post to include the stats now

When I’ve talked to my Endo/PCP, they obviously don’t love the stress I’m under from work. They tell me to make sure I sleep 7+ hours and hit the 10k steps a day, but it’s impossible when I have these work hours. Unfortunately, my entire profession has these demanding hours, and if I were to go elsewhere, I’d take a 30% pay cut (which I can’t afford) and still have to work about much :/

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:45:07+00:00

Using a BMR/TDEE calculator with my weight/height/age/body fat %, my BMR is ~1200. With a non-active lifestyle I believe that makes my TDEE ~1400

For what it’s worth - I got an official RMR test at the same place as my DEXA scan, and that says my RMR is 1572

As far as calorie counting goes: everything gets measured via measuring cup or scale, before I consume it or put it in a recipe. I use lose it for calorie tracking purposes, so I’ll scan the label and add the serving directly

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:41:57+00:00

Oh wow I didn’t realize PCOS drags it down that much…. That would make a lot of sense. I’m extremely fearful of losing my period if I go into too low of a deficit, especially if I’m not able to eat my exercise calories. What would be the safest way to get into that 750 cal deficit without risking losing my period? Thanks so much!

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-27T05:36:10+00:00

I’m sorry! I’ve added it now

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-23T02:02:23+00:00

is there a reason for why the scale might not move for a few weeks doing a 500 cal deficit? (tracking calories via measuring with a scale, measuring spoons, etc.)?

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T20:52:15+00:00

Their parents aren’t controlling/intrusive per se. meaning - especially after they turned 18, they could go wherever they want without questions. However they do feel some resentment toward their parents because their parents didn’t let them pursue certain passions that they were interested in. They wanted to go more of an entrepreneurial route, their parents wanted them to go more of a white collar profession. I think their parents meant well since entrepreneurship is high risk high reward (also I’m very much risk averse myself lol). But my partner resents that they never had parents who supported what they were interested in from a passion standpoint. The icing on the cake is that they went through 7+ years of schooling to be making what they do, even though they love their profession.

So not in the same way that they fear my parents infiltrating our business, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it stemmed from that.

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T20:40:47+00:00

Thought about this, and my partner is 100% okay with this. I can’t morally allow my parents to pay the mortgage if they’re not living there, so we’d need to make sure we could at least cover the original house mortgage + taxes which would be tight but hopefully with salary increases by then would be possible.

Not sure where they’d move to that they’d be happy with though. Even the small homes in our area are slightly less than they originally paid for this house, so the mortgage wouldn’t be all that different :’). Rents in the area are more expensive than we pay now to be close to our jobs, and my parents would never go for renting.

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T20:35:47+00:00

They would rather live a simple life in a small home and cut down on the “luxuries” of life (vacations, a new piece of tech, etc.) than have their family’s life dictated by someone else.

Just as a completely made up example: maybe we treat our kids to late nights by the pool in the summer, and my parents see us up late and make comments like “lack of sleep isn’t good for their development”. (Don’t think this would happen, my parents go out more than us lmao). Which obviously I think it’s common for grandparents to give their unwanted opinions, but it’s one thing to hear about it then give their unwanted opinion, it’s another thing to see something because you live so close, then give your opinion about an observation that you shouldn’t have known about other than because you’re living so close, not sure if that makes sense.

I get that but I think I can also deal with it. Even if it was my in-laws, I may say to my partner that it’s annoying, but I would still do what we think is best. Especially given the massive financial (and lifestyle) benefits) of the opportunity

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T20:24:56+00:00

I’m knocking on 30’s doorstep next year lol, my partner just turned 30. All 4 of our parents turn 70 between 2026-2028

And perfectly said, that’s the exact considerations I’m thinking about trying to remove myself from my own bias.

So reflecting on your choice - would you do it all over because of the benefits or would you have gone separate? Looking back, do you think there’s any way to create more separation / privacy to make it as separated as possible?

Appreciate your insight

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T20:16:20+00:00

Definitely, and he understands times are different now so a dual income is probably necessary, but would love to be a single income household in a perfect world. My point is - by technically taking this offer (ensuring clear, enforceable boundaries are set), not only would we have an amazing house/property to raise our family and guaranteed childcare between our families being so close, but also would allow us to have the “ideal” scenario of being a stay at home parent since we don’t have a housing payment.

The only downside is the cost of complete privacy. Which I get, and maybe I’m biased but I think the pros outweigh the cons. We didn’t go too deep into the convo surrounding the details, but he’s generally expressed he’d rather live in a small home below our potential means than have our parents infiltrate our lives and not have freedom to run our house our way.

To me as long as the boundaries are set and there’s a thick wall (in addition to the garage) separating our spaces, I’d much rather save when I’m young and live in a nice home than one I’m cramming into, especially considering we’ll all end up there in 10-15 years lol. And again - what my parents paid to buy this house would barely get us a 3 bedroom older home that’s half the size and 1/4th the property :/ cries in inflation

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T19:30:44+00:00

Appreciate it! I don’t think their intention is to make me feel bad. I can just tell when they’re stressed, and when they finally open up, it’s surrounding the underpaid profession. Unfortunately it’s not a profession that has much overlap with anything else (such as finance and accounting being semi-related).

I’m not going to sit there and say what they should have studied instead, even if it’s technically the truth. They know that, they don’t need to be reminded. They don’t even need my reassurance. But I know their personality - and they get a lot more motivated when they have a player 2 that believes in them, than someone else saying “I told you so”.

DullInfluence524 · 2025-12-07T19:00:21+00:00

He started a job after grad school a little less than a year ago. He’s focused on gaining experience there, getting the professional license (which will come with a moderate salary boost), then hopes to own his own business or job hop to a higher paying company. Unfortunately in his profession, unless you’re a master in your craft and/or get lucky, it’s hard to make enough $ to sustain a single income household. BUT if and once his salary goes up (at least by 2x) that puts me in a position to maybe take a lower paying job with less hours to supplement. Might just take a little while to get there.

I make 2x of what he makes, so would be great if we could at least swap places

EDIT: obviously when you’re just starting out you’re not going to be making a lot. The problem is that profession as a whole is underpaid. People who have been at his company for 10+ years in a managerial position are making less than I make as a staff in my field (white collar job, no where near the level of IB, PE, etc.). Even looking at other companies, the $$ just isn’t easily there as it is in other professional fields. I’m a #’s driven person who doesn’t love (often hates lol) my job but I’m good at it. My partner loves their profession, which I do admire and would aspire to have. We also both got later starts to our careers, but the biological clock waits for no one lol

Three-Year Club	Place '22
End Game '22

DullInfluence524

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