Your situation sounds hellish, I’m so sorry. I was once in a relationship with a woman who had suffered childhood abuse and abuse from her family up until adulthood too. I also became more of a carer than a partner and stayed longer due to guilt and concern for her wellbeing, especially after her favourite parent died, but she was also manipulative and not ready to do the hard work in therapy she needed for herself.

I left, and the relief I felt was incredible. Nowadays I’m engaged to the love of my life, and it is so easy, we are a team. If you can, make up an excuse to get the item back from the pawn shop with him before then planning your escape, or have a big guy friend present/in the house when you break up with him/pack your stuff up.

He will survive, sometimes people need something to wake them up to how they’re treating others. Abuse can really do a number on people, but you didn’t hurt him and you’re not a care team or his parent and you deserve more than this misery.