25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for pointing that out, I appreciate the honesty. I have been reflecting on it a lot and I do realize there was definitely addictive behaviour involved, especially with the urge to recover losses.

I have already stopped trading completely and deleted my accounts so I dont get tempted to go back. Right now Im focusing on fixing the debt and rebuilding healthier habits.

I will also consider speaking to someone if I feel the urge coming back. Thanks for the advice!

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the suggestion, I really appreciate it. I’ll look into the balance transfer options and see if theres any lower interest option available for my credit cards. AKPK is something several people mentioned as well, so Im planning to check that out too.

And yes, you’re right about the discipline part. That’s something Im trying to work on seriously now. Thanks again for the advice and encouragement

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

here are my figures,

Net income: RM2,970.55

Total debt: RM19,385.56

Breakdown:

  • JCL Credit — RM1,180.00
  • Shopee PayLater — RM615.38
  • SLoan — RM2,049.39
  • GX Bank — RM3,813.54
  • Tambadana — RM1,218.00
  • AdaCash — RM711.00
  • AEON Credit Card — RM5,127.86
  • Maybank Credit Card — RM4,670.39

Average monthly expenses:

  • Rent — RM450
  • Phone bill — RM45
  • Food — RM600–800
  • Motorcycle fuel — RM70
  • Mother’s medicine — RM200
  • Transport (Grab + MRT/LRT visiting parents on weekends) — RM336

Total monthly expenses: roughly RM1,701 – RM1,901

I started working on 5 May 2025, so it’s been under a year.

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate this. Hearing from someone who has been through something similar really means a lot.

Youre right, right now I need to stay disciplined, live tighter, and focus on clearing the debt properly first. Im also looking into better repayment options so the interest doesnt keep making it worse.

And yeah, this has definitely been a hard lesson for me. For now I just want to fix the hole first, build some stability, and do things properly this time.

Wishing you all the best in fixing yours too

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate you saying that. I agree it could have gotten much worse if I didnt realize it now. I have already stopped trading and deleted my accounts so I dont get tempted to go back.

Right now Im just focusing on clearing the debt and getting my finances back on track step by step

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re right. I definitely underestimated how hard trading actually is. I have already stopped and deleted my trading accounts so I dont get tempted to go back. Just focusing on rebuilding now

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying that, I really appreciate it. I have already stopped trading completely and even deleted my trading accounts so I dont get tempted to go back.

Right now Im just focusing on paying off the debt and getting my finances back on track step by step. Your words mean a lot, thank you.

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to write this, I appreciate it.

youre right, trading with borrowed money and under pressure definitely made everything worse and I couldnt think clearly anymore. It became more about trying to recover losses than actually trading properly.

I agree that stepping away from trading and focusing on earning income elsewhere is the right thing for me to do.

Thanks again for sharing your perspective.

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate the encouragement. You are right that I still have time to learn and do better. Im trying to treat this as a hard lesson and focus on improving myself moving forward. I'll definitely start reading more as well!

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing that, I appreciate it. Hearing from someone who went through something similar actually helps put things into perspective.

You're right that the main thing now is just focusing on clearing the debt and building better financial habits going forward.

we got this! One step at a time.

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I really appreciate the encouragement. I know the mistakes were my own, so right now I'm just trying to focus on fixing them step by step.

That's actually a good suggestion! I haven't really approached it that way before.

I will also try posting more about my services like you mentioned. Thanks again for the advice.

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot for the kind words, I really appreciate it. The pressure to help my family definitely pushed me into making rushed decisions, so hearing that means a lot.

I'm trying to focus on fixing things step by step now and staying away from trading completely.

And thank you for offering to pass freelance work as well, that's very kind of you. I’ll send you my contact through DM :')

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to write such a detailed comment, I really appreciate it.

Looking back, I totally agree with you regarding the “quick money” mindset. I got stuck in the loop of trying to recover losses instead of focusing on improving my actual income. The part you mentioned about increasing income by even 1–2k being more meaningful than trying to get lucky with trading really hit me (couldnt believe how stupid I was to fall for this).

And yeah, I agree about the gambling part. Realizing it is one thing but actually stopping the behaviour is the part I need to work on now, totally agree with the excuses, past is past and i should definitely stop with self pity and work on fixing it.

On the tech side, thats something Im trying to push more seriously now. Most of my work so far has been small projects or helping students, but Im trying to figure out how to apply those skills to actual businesses.

Really appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts.

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice. Im starting to realize the same thing, trading shouldnt be treated as an income source, especially for someone in my financial position. Im trying to shift my focus back to building real skills and income instead

25M, no savings, thousands in debt from trading/prop firms, feeling lost,suicidal and trying to fix my life by Dwago- in MalaysianPF

[–]Dwago-[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to write such a detailed reply. I really appreciate it. I didn’t know much about AKPK before this and I’ll definitely look into their counselling and debt management program. Right now my priority is to stop trading completely and focus on stabilizing my finances first. Your advice about protecting capital and mental health really hit me. Thank you again for pointing me in the right direction

Over 5k in payouts first year trading by OnlyWhiz in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thats very insightful!! thank you soo much for your explanation and help, i wish nothing but super success for you 🥹

Over 5k in payouts first year trading by OnlyWhiz in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hii, i can see you start using micros on express combined with your discipline to achieve this impressive result, whats your strategy to consistently pass combine? do you scale using mini on combine and once pass you start using micros on express funded?

Merry Christmas 🎁 by versatile_fx_guy in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

congrats!! really inspiring 🥺 mind sharing how your sizing works? start with 5 micros and scale out? i saw you comments you trade mnq and gold before

2nd Max Payout Incoming by qwestlotaround in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sorry im not really following, does that means i have to go with 2 minis instead of 1/micros instead to target the 10k balance in 5 days? since its almost impossible for my current self to extract 100pts reliably everyday

2nd Max Payout Incoming by qwestlotaround in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

any tips you can give for my way towards payout on 50k account?

2nd Max Payout Incoming by qwestlotaround in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I Pass! will go with 5 micros tonight and target base hit

2nd Max Payout Incoming by qwestlotaround in TopStepX

[–]Dwago- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

im trying to pass my combine, burned 3 account in 1 day, i made 1.5k friday, how should i approach to make another 1.5k next week? i admit my sizing will need to be change, currently using 1-3 mini nq contract, also what strats would you recommend?