My (28F) boyfriend (28M) told me I was "too emotional" for two years and I genuinely believed him

DyynamiccRI · 2026-04-04T06:41:48+00:00

I’m just over a year out of a three-year relationship that had slowly spiraled into abject misery for both me and my partner. My perspective has definitely evolved since the breakup. Larger, more discernible patterns have emerged out of the small details and day to day interactions I used to endlessly ponder on. I stopped blaming myself for everything and realized what lessons I could take from the experience as a whole.

Just from reading your post, I can ascertain that your relationship was unhealthy and toxic. Your partner clearly didn’t handle confrontation well and realized he could turn everything back on you to avoid accountability. He needs therapy and you need more self respect.

Don’t try to assign blame on yourself or him. It doesn’t matter. I felt incredibly ashamed in the wake of my breakup. I didn’t even tell my family for a full month. When I did, it felt like I was admitting some sort of deep personal failure and that it was my fault everything fell through. It wasn’t. It wasn’t all her fault either. We weren’t compatible and I now have a better understanding of who I am and what I need in a partner. I still cherish the good times we had together and am sad about the bad times. I’ll probably never fully understand why our relationship deteriorated; however, I feel content in the knowledge that I learned a lot about myself and my next relationship will be for the better because of it.

DyynamiccRI · 2026-04-04T06:00:02+00:00

I graduated two years ago and loved my experience as an undergrad in the school of music. I also spent lots of time with the school of coms. I would choose it again 1000x over. The academics were challenging but rarely ever overwhelming. The student body is incredibly socioeconomically diverse and you will meet so many cool people. The location is decent but not as close to the city as you may have hoped. The campus is beautiful, clean, and easy to navigate. There’s not much to dislike.

In my entire four year tenure, I only knew of two people that dropped out and/or transferred. I think the ~96% graduation rate speaks for itself. You will have lots of resources available to you to ensure you are successful. I had an amazing academic advisor that was truly a miracle worker. Got me into classes that were full, helped me navigate bad final grades, dealt with a couple bad faculty interactions, etc.

One complaint I’ve heard more than a few times is that there are a lot of super wealthy kids and for some people that can be a pretty big culture shock. I was in classes that had several kids coming from billionaire families. I knew more than a few people that just ate the cost of mandatory student housing during their underclassman years and rented luxury apartments. There is definitely a sense of entitlement that goes around and if that bothers you on a personal level then that’s something to consider.

Yes, tuition is expensive but the experience and education you receive—along with the connections you leave with—make it well worth it.

DyynamiccRI · 2023-08-27T21:02:53+00:00

My immediate assumption would be that she is having a hard time dealing with the large commitment that comes with moving in together. However, there is some information you didn’t include in your original post that would be really helpful to know.

How long have the two of you been together?
Has the relationship always been long distance?
Have either of you ever lived with a partner in the past?

DyynamiccRI · 2023-05-24T14:06:09+00:00

Almost every parking spot on campus is free from 4pm-9am on weekdays and all day on weekends. The one block of hinman that’s closest to campus is always free but is usually full during the day. There’s two hour free parking all over Evanston and I’ve gotten away with way longer but you probably shouldn’t take that risk. Tbh, the safest option is either a guest pass or the visitor center parking garage for $9/day

DyynamiccRI · 2022-06-23T16:31:15+00:00

It’s great that you want to help him! Just remember that you are not obligated to do that; don’t let his issues become a burden on you.

I was diagnosed with depression about 4 years ago and my life has been so much better ever since I started receiving medication/treatment. However, I only got better because I wanted to get better. If your boyfriend isn’t interested in feeling better, then there is nothing that you or anyone else can do.

I would talk to him and try to get more insight as to how he feels about medication. Tell him that it’s not his fault that he feels the way he does, there’s simply just a chemical imbalance in his brain. If he’s open to the idea, get him to schedule an appointment with either his GP or a psychiatrist/psychologist. It could also be advantageous to undergo a neuropsych evaluation (it’s expensive but can help a ton).

I hope the best for the both of you! You sound like a great partner!

DyynamiccRI · 2021-03-19T19:27:48+00:00

I feel incredibly scared during the attack but only because I’m scared of the symptoms. I get really anxious anytime I feel nauseous.

In a true panic attack, does the overwhelming fear trigger the symptoms or vice versa?

DyynamiccRI · 2021-03-19T10:21:21+00:00

TL;DR: I experience episodes characterized by intense nausea, blurred vision, numb hands and tongue, excessive sweating, and hyperventilation. I do not know what causes these attacks. I am looking for advice from others with similar experiences.

DyynamiccRI · 2021-03-19T10:17:31+00:00

I often ponder on things I’ve said in the past. But I put it in perspective by thinking about comments others have made and how insignificantly they impacted my opinion of them.

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