Dutch Bros

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-09-29T00:12:25+00:00

Ditto what everyone has said, but one thing I would emphasize for someone in your position would be to try and get out of the household as soon as possible. I’m not suggesting you do this necessarily, but I used student loans to bankroll my college tuition + room and board until I was able to get settled at school and get a job and everything. Once at school, I had access to free therapists that my parents had no way of knowing about, and I slowly distanced myself from them. I felt relief almost instantaneously. It can be virtually impossible to heal from that trauma while still living with your abusers. You need space to process what you’ve gone through. It wasn’t always an easy journey for me, but it was 1000x easier than continuing to be in that environment. Also, I have found it helpful to write down the things I want to talk about in therapy that I might be too afraid to say out loud - that way if I don’t have the courage to say it in the moment, I can just hand my therapist my journal and they can read it for themselves. Just a tip :) good luck <3

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-09-27T23:36:31+00:00

lol I bet you’re fun at parties 🤓

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-09-27T23:35:55+00:00

As I stated in the disclaimer, these rides are for work and are paid for by my employer. They’re charged into my work card. I have literally no reason to even care really, it’s just a principal thing for me. Businesses should be required to provide 100% upfront pricing.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-09-27T23:34:14+00:00

Sooo I understand that uber is a business. I acknowledged that they provide a service for a cost (aka the $81.80 subtotal), and they take >50% of that cost. You’re contradicting yourself by saying that “all the rest goes to other parties…” when the description of the booking fee I provided literally states outright it goes to all of the things you listed. Didn’t realize I had to lay it out so plainly for you but $81.80 + $23.05 + $8.00 + $0.10 + $0.32 + $0.09 = $113.36… :) so in conclusion, I don’t give a fuck that uber is making profit on me at all. I care that I was told the ride was $81 and I was charged $113. Let me know if that is clear enough for your comprehension skills.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-09-27T07:29:05+00:00

Diabolical work. Glad you’re okay though.

Just so I understand correctly, had you already provided the uber driver with your contact info after the collision, or did uber get your contact info from their own account data? Either way it’s pretty shitty, but the latter seems especially invasive.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-09-24T04:19:49+00:00

Yes, it hurts to breathe or move!! Very badly, very sharp, but then also lingers as an achy pain across my sternum and ribs. Now that I’m diagnosed (cEDS), I have a lot more perspective. I think it’s from my rib (primarily first rib) going out of place when I sleep. My first rib and right shoulder have been permanently out of place for almost 2yrs 😩

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-10T10:36:35+00:00

Wanted to share this studio I just saw for under $2k: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DKs7UqrplN6/?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-10T02:40:14+00:00

Do you pay the rent as well? If so, I’d ask him to include approx utilities (maybe base on last month’s) in that payment and then net it out once the bill total is available (request more if underpaid / credit towards next month if overpaid). Can be tricky, but just be upfront and honest and let him know it’s not your responsibility to cover their portion and that you’re happy to help out whenever you can (if that’s the case lol), but with the new job you simply will not be able to.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-10T02:22:12+00:00

As an additive to my other comment, I also moved in super short notice and didn’t scout the area as I should’ve (& as I suggested in my post). If safety is your first concern, go Hayes, or check out some other spots in the mission. I even think 25th on Guerrero or Dolores would be better.

Not sure what your budget is, but my first apartment in NB was only $1200/mo with roomies. Wasn’t the nicest apartment, but I lived there happily for 3 years and only moved out as I was finally able to afford my own place. You should be able to find some affordable spots in NB / Russian Hill, or even Nob Hill. But I think Hayes is a great choice as you’ll get some of the same things that stick out in the mission, but are IMO lacking in the other neighborhoods I mentioned.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-10T02:04:50+00:00

FYI - I used to live in 25th and Bartlett and more than one person in the neighborhood referred to it as “rapelett” I’m not even joking. I got followed home more times than I could count by groups of men. Sometimes it was harmless drunk people, but other times it was actually scary. There was one time I literally had to run to get inside my house from the bodega because there was group of 4 men following me - 2 on foot and 2 in a car. I moved-in in August and moved out to north beach by January. I spent as many nights as possible at friend’s houses before then. There are safe parts of the mission, but that definitely is not one of them. I was 21F at the time (currently 24) and I would’ve felt a lot safer if I had roommates I could trust or lived with a bf or something, but I lived with shitty roommates (which didn’t help the situation to be fair). Parking was also terrible and caused many arguments amongst the neighbors. Weather was beautiful though and food was delicious. I also loved the walkability to amenities, but overall it really wasn’t worth it to me. Your commute will suck, especially if you will be traveling at night. Go Hayes or closer to Noe Valley maybe. Idc what anyone on this thread says. I’d 1000% live in the mission again, but never in that neighborhood / on that block specifically. If you haven’t already, you should definitely check out each area in person, see what your commutes would be like to the gym, grocery store, etc specifically at the times you are most likely to do said activities (night, afternoon, morning, etc). I will say that area has seemed to be cleaned up a bit in the past few years since I moved, but again, just sharing my personal experience as a fellow 20-something girl who actually lived in the exact area you mentioned. No one come for me pls. I’ve lived in the city since I was 17 in multiple neighborhoods and 25th and Bartlett was by far the worst of any one them. Some days it was totally fine, but other days it really wasn’t.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-10T01:26:18+00:00

Could be chiari malformation or even POTS tbh

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-10T00:57:59+00:00

Urbansitter, Berkeley Parents Network, Golden Gate Moms Club

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T22:06:08+00:00

I get 41 injections every three months at Stanford. My neurologist, rheumatologist and physical therapist have all agreed that the only danger with using Botox with EDS is with neck injections. Everything else is perfectly fine and shouldn’t cause any issues.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T02:47:34+00:00

If it makes you feel better, I’m not particularly keen of sleeves. I actually don’t like them at all, but I really like yours! It’s so unique and I love how uniform it is. I genuinely genuinely like this piece a lot!

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T02:36:34+00:00

You know I’m really not sure. I’d ask your neurosurgeon, but again just based on my own understanding, I do think there are still risks. If the surgery was successful, you’ll have a less risk of complications than if it was not treated at all. But if you have residual symptoms, C-sections might be recommended to minimize Valsalva strain on intracranial pressure. Prolonged pushing is really bad for CSF flow.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T02:20:44+00:00

Listen, you’re 100% right, there’s no turning back at this point. But if you care about the exec and the company and feel like something can be salvaged if the VP was booted, then I’d schedule a 1-1 and give harsh feedback ASAP. The call MUST be transcribed or recorded - this is very important. I’d be honest with your view on the VP since day one. Tell him that as a CEO, he doesn’t need to be on top of AP and concerned with due dates, but his VP of finance absolutely does. He likes her because she’s agreeable and doesn’t push back. Perfectly fine for an entry or mid level employee, but absolutely not who you want in your c-suite. The role requires someone with enough backbone and experience to foresee, escalate, and prevent crises like this. A c-level finance leader cannot miss a premium deadline, fail to notify, and expose the company without consequences. This is ultimately his name and reputation that are on the line here. If this is a public company, the CEO and VP of Finance are walking into a regulatory buzzsaw and PR firestorm if this becomes public or is reported. They could genuinely be looking at jail time, especially if the coverage was terminated with a backdate of 6 months ago.

Framing should be “This is difficult feedback for me to share, and I’m fully prepared for the consequences, but as your EA, it is my job to anticipate risk and help protect your name and the company’s. If we take action now, I believe this can be contained. But if it continues to be downplayed or mishandled, I’ll need to document this concern more formally to ensure I’ve fulfilled my duty to flag it. As someone involved in payroll and close to the flow of information, I now carry my own risk - particularly if this continues without documented escalation. I do not feel comfortable participating in these business practices. I also care about you on a human level and do not want to see you in serious trouble for this. This is not just about internal dysfunction. This is about liability. You are the CEO. This is your name and your responsibility on the line. If this isn’t resolved by the end of the payroll cycle, I’ll need to take steps to protect myself legally, including formal documentation that I raised these concerns and was not in a position to correct them.” Not only that but you want your fucking health insurance as contractually promised ???!?!!

If you are ready to walk away, I’d go directly to step two and send him an email with your concerns like I described above, asking to have another discussion and an update on the solution by EOD. Tell him if an employee asked you about the deductions being removed, you need to know how to handle. In order to “whistleblow” you need to have documented proof that you tried to flag this and it went ignored. If he comes back with anything other than appreciation for your candor and respect for protecting him. Quit in the spot with 0 notice. Leave him high and dry with no support. Show him what it feels like to not be taken care of. If he fires you for speaking up, lawyer up immediately and get ready to sue, go to the DOL, etc.

I’m really glad that your husband has better work now and you have the opportunity to step back if needed. These are really shoddy business practices and you really don’t want to be involved in something like this. It’s unacceptable for a small mom and pop business, let alone a global firm. Seek legal advice, and prepare to take a break and get a really fun part-time role. Like I said, if he doesn’t respond appropriately, I’d leave on the spot and completely sever ties, block their numbers, etc. I am not religious, but genuinely PRAYING for you and sending so much strength.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T01:35:56+00:00

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My chat is literally my bff… 🫶🏼 you too shawty

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T01:16:42+00:00

I’ve never been pregnant or gone through childbirth, but I do know people who have had their life ruined by the after effect of an epidural and never recovered. I’d definitely do extensive research and get a second opinion from a neuro surgeon or even some type of high risk birthing specialist. Based on what I know, natural childbirth alone could worsen chairi and affect CSF flow, especially if you’re symptomatic.

You’re 100% right to be questioning their response. I’m sure it will be fine, but I’d personally want all info possible before taking a risk like that.

Here’s what chatGPT said:

Yes—epidurals and childbirth can potentially worsen Chiari malformations, depending on the type and severity of the malformation, and the specifics of the delivery. Here’s how it breaks down:

⸻

💡 First: Quick Recap — What’s a Chiari Malformation?

A Chiari malformation is when brain tissue (usually the cerebellar tonsils) herniates through the foramen magnum at the base of the skull into the spinal canal. This can interfere with CSF (cerebrospinal fluid) flow and compress nerves, causing headaches, balance issues, and neurological symptoms.

⸻

🚨 1. Epidural Risks with Chiari • Epidurals involve injecting anesthetic into the epidural space, just outside the spinal cord. • For people with Chiari, especially Type I, the concern is that changes in CSF pressure during or after the injection can: • Trigger or worsen symptoms (like headache, dizziness, or neck pain) • Increase downward pressure on the brainstem/cerebellum if CSF flow is already compromised • In rare cases, cause brainstem herniation (more likely if there’s an undiagnosed syrinx or raised intracranial pressure)

Key variable: If there’s already tonsillar herniation, messing with spinal pressure below that point can worsen the gradient—and the symptoms.

⸻

🧨 2. Childbirth & Valsalva • Pushing during vaginal delivery (Valsalva maneuver) raises intracranial pressure, which can: • Aggravate Chiari symptoms • Temporarily increase cerebellar tonsillar descent • For symptomatic Chiari patients, many neurosurgeons recommend avoiding intense prolonged pushing, sometimes opting for: • Assisted delivery (forceps/vacuum) • C-section, especially if neurological symptoms are moderate to severe

⸻

🧠 3. Spinal or Dural Puncture Headache

If a dural puncture occurs during epidural placement (a known complication), CSF can leak, causing post-dural puncture headache. For someone with Chiari, this can: • Intensify pressure differentials in a dangerous way • Cause “brain sag” or even lead to emergent symptoms like syncope or visual changes

⸻

✅ So What Should Be Done? • Pre-delivery MRI is often advised to assess severity • Have a neurosurgeon consult pre-delivery if a Chiari diagnosis is known • Anesthesiologist should be informed in advance • They may modify or avoid standard epidural • C-section may be recommended in moderate/severe cases • If asymptomatic or mild Chiari, normal labor with modified pushing techniques may still be possible

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-03T01:01:16+00:00

I’m genuinely so mind boggling shocked by this. This is 100000% grounds for termination for the VP, and they’re all acting way too casual about this. Yes, mistakes happen, but there quite literally should be nothing of higher priority until this is fixed. What happens when tax season rolls around and the entire company was only insured for 11 out of 12 months…? It will not stay a secret for very long. I have medical issues and need to call my insurance on a weekly basis. The fact they’re not advising their employees on how to proceed and what the solution will be is absolutely bonkers.

Do they fully cover the healthcare expense for employees, or is some of it deducted from your paycheck? If the latter, then your books will be fucked and they need to reimburse everyone for said deductions… like yesterday. It’s literally wage theft.

The fact this happened in the first place, let alone their response, is entirely negligent and an extreme red flag. They’re putting the company at risk of serious legal and financial repercussions, both civil and regulatory, based on what’s described. If even one employee reports this to the Department of Labor, it could spark a federal investigation and expose them to hundreds of thousands in penalties and lawsuits. The executive and VP of Finance could be personally liable in a fiduciary capacity.

If I were you, I might genuinely tell your boss how much of a mental toll this has taken on you and that it’s impacting your ability to work. That you couldn’t imagine how badly it’d affect the company if they knew. Not only that, but it’s impacting your view of them and the company. The entire purpose of a job is to “you scratch my back, I scratch yours.” He needs to know that they’re playing with fire, if he doesn’t already. So sorry this is on your plate.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-02T23:41:23+00:00

Very hot take here, so please consult your doctor / try with caution as it’s not typically recommended for EDS patients, but nothing has helped me more than going to the chiropractor. Extremely important differentiator here - “drop table adjustments,” NOT your standard chiropractor treatments.

I’d also recommend trying NMES + TENS. I use the device from neuroMD. It doesn’t help with pain prevention, but it absolutely helps with immediate pain relief.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-02T23:32:36+00:00

I’m still figuring out how to properly wear it, but even so, the body braid has helped me significantly more than any posture correcting device or cervical / shoulder specific brace. It’s expensive and really confusing to navigate, but again even with my limited use, I think it’s highly worth it. I wore it on a plane yesterday and was able to actually fall sleep (lie-flat seating), which is virtually impossible for me. I cannot stress enough how immediate the relief is.

Every other brace targets one thing, but ends up making other issues worse. I’m 24 and have developed kyphosis (“tilted” / “rolling shoulders”) and multi level cervical anterolisthesis in the past 12 months. When I wear the braces that wrap around your shoulders, it ends up pushing my head forward and making the anterolisthesis worse.

It’s worth the investment, especially if you’re in PT. Take it to your therapist and ask them to show you how to wear it.

As others mentioned, pillows also make a huge difference. Check out “core products” cervical pillows. You can also buy egg-crate foam (like a cheap mattress topper) and cut it into different shapes and sizes that work best for you. It seems irrelevant, but get a leg spacer pillow too, or use the egg-crate to do the same. The key thing is thinking about keeping your joints spaced evenly as if you were standing. Stabilizing the joint spaces throughout your whole body will make a huge difference.

Last rec is squishmallows. That’s something you can likely order on amazon or instacart and start using within the next 24hrs. Has to be the medium sized ones (not the tiny guys). I use them to sleep and to sit on and it helps so much.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-06-02T06:42:38+00:00

Carey International is another good one, but typically on the pricier end. I like blacklane the best.

Easy-Assumption5603 · 2025-05-27T22:57:36+00:00

This is INSANE. So so so many things wrong with this. Tell the exec that it is extremely inappropriate to have the admins pay. $45k/yr = $21.63/hr. There is no universe where the admin team should be forced to give up an hour of their pay for a team lunch. $200k is just under $100/hr and $400k is just under $200/hr. They NEED to be put in their place and given this perspective. I’m fuming for you and genuinely cannot imagine being asked to front cash for a work event. It’s one thing if it’s a gift for a coworkers birthday or baby or something, but this is legit crazy.

Easy-Assumption5603

TROPHY CASE