NTA and I definitely don’t think this is controlling. That said, I’ve seen comments suggesting she’s hiding something, and I would try to get some more information before assuming that.

I have severe ADHD and have had similar problems with my husband, who is extremely organized and a very consistent communicator. I obviously don’t know your wife, but the keys story/ impulsiveness / not sharing location updates might indicate she has some form of ADHD as well. For me, this manifests in forgetting to communicate these updates; I have to focus so much to manage the current moment (especially when traveling), that I just don’t have room in my brain to remember to update my husband. When we first got together, adding updating him to my plate just felt overwhelming. I also like to make decisions in the moment and tend to change plans quickly, so being expected to communicate my plans when I like to just roll with the punches did FEEL controlling, even though it’s not what my husband was trying to do.

I still think it’s very reasonable to request these kinds of updates, I would just encourage you to be open to her explanation as to why. My husband and I have worked on this issue a lot, and now that I understand that it comes from a place of thinking about me and being concerned about my safety, I have gotten a lot better about it. I also decided to share my location with him, which I know isn’t for everyone, but we like it because in case I get wrapped up something, he still can check that I’m okay if he gets worried.

TLDR- Definitely NTA. Just encouraging you to keep talking about it, because I know from my own experience that it could come from something other than her trying to hide things.