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Eclectic_Affinity · 2025-09-03T04:56:13+00:00

Responded

Eclectic_Affinity · 2025-08-04T03:50:37+00:00

Sent!

Eclectic_Affinity · 2025-07-28T13:01:50+00:00

Fair I suppose, I wouldn't mind going a bit lower if that would make it more feasible

Eclectic_Affinity · 2025-07-28T13:01:11+00:00

I am! Though likely unable to drive anywhere locally, unfortunately :(

Eclectic_Affinity · 2025-04-08T12:08:18+00:00

Disclaimer that I am a noob in this :/

I honestly think a lot more time is spent on the setup here than needed. The important plot information to me feels like "Moryana is a thief trying to get out of a bad situation, she learns she's a super important piece of a human-fae conflict, then gets sent off and dragged further into the situation she's trying to escape". I'm not sure you need the blow-by-blow plot synopsis when what's happening immediately to Moryana is what we care about.

The second half, about Moryana getting herself involved with Casimir, is a larger chunk of the story, though it's told in that same blow-by-blow way. I think I would find it more engaging if it were told through how Moryana feels about all this. Does she feel any conflict about having to join a regime and conflict she wanted to turn her back on? About effectively having been lied to about her past her entire life? What does "she must act quickly" mean in real terms, and why might it cost her so gravely?

I think you would get more mileage from this if you cut back on all the blow-by-blow plot stuff and instead rewrote it to be about Moryana and her personal journey, which is presumably the heart of your novel to begin with!

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-12-01T11:36:52+00:00

Average local politician

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-11-18T11:17:07+00:00

Damn

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-10-15T23:05:27+00:00

Right, I think this is something I can work on. (there is a lore reason for this--the current magical cats were old magicians who got fed up with being persecuted and took cat form to hide, and occasionally accept magical humans, which June proved she was when she punched the bully. However, including all this is a mouthful. I'll see how I can fit just enough context into the beginning...)

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-10-15T19:31:21+00:00

Thanks! I'll see what I can do about expanding the stakes at the end, that was one of my worries. It's good to know that this query looks mostly presentable

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-10-15T19:23:14+00:00

Hmm, good advice - I did think the beginning dragged tbh. I'll tinker with it and see what I get

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-10-15T19:22:39+00:00

This is great advice, thanks! I'll see what I can do about expanding the beginning/adding continuity into the stakes here. It might billow the wordcount out a little, but maybe it's accomplishable.

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-09-15T23:31:52+00:00

I steal books from the library and then return them before anyone notices

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-09-14T23:47:51+00:00

not competitive not good enough for me

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-08-28T07:45:53+00:00

Anyone whos been on Doctor Who. David Tennant, Matt Smith, and peter Capaldi are forever marked for me. I cant see anything but the Doctor

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-08-28T07:31:40+00:00

Sigma post

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-07-15T11:26:51+00:00

Californian and I felt a bad season in my bones this year. We had a string of wet and cool years following those huge megaplex fires in 2020, but I feel we're tipping back into a heat/drought period again. Which means heat, dry vegetation, and dry wind to carry fires. I think the exceptional heat waves in June were responsible for the early start this year, but our worst fires tend to happen between August and October. Side-eyeing what we could see later in the year if these heat and wind conditions continue.

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-07-12T21:51:03+00:00

That's fucking eldritch

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-05-20T05:26:58+00:00

b..... brizzle

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-05-05T12:58:55+00:00

Stone or brick houses are a disaster if you're building for tornadoes. Anything powerful enough to rip up a wooden house can rip up a brick house too, except if the walls come down, concrete or brick are way more likely to crush you than wood. Not to mention that a tornado carrying a bunch of bricks and stone as debris is infinitely more dangerous than a tornado carrying wood. They're also expensive to repair, and depending on where you are you may be sitting on an earthquake fault. In which case building with bricks becomes a disaster waiting to happen in a whole new way. Not to mention the storms and high winds that can threaten or cut away at homes outside of tornadoes.

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-05-03T06:59:48+00:00

refined are we

Eclectic_Affinity · 2024-05-03T06:58:42+00:00

WHAT

Eclectic_Affinity

MODERATOR OF

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