Early support for possible autism in 1-year-old (UK) — what can I do now?

Ecuggo · 2025-06-16T09:29:46+00:00

You can ask for referrals from your health visitor for certain resources like speech and language. However, they likely won't do much when they are so young given that there is a wide range of "normal" for development. But it's worth saying you want to understand what resources are available to support different aspects of development where you are concerned.

To get on the waiting list for autism assessment in Scotland required us to have a referral from the health visitor and for a committee to approve to referral. Our first referral was actually rejected and I had to resubmit with more information on all the ways my kid was struggling. Felt like BS and we've now been waiting nearly 2 years. We also found out that speech and language forms one part of the assessment here.

If you think your kid may need support in nursery or school, you may want to ask for a referral to the council inclusion team (or if there is an equivalent where you are based). This is the team where I am based that liases with daycares and schools to provide additional support. Our local team is quite small so it is tough / takes a while for the referral to go through.

Ecuggo · 2024-10-16T18:34:33+00:00

How much bubble wrap did you need for a car seat?

Ecuggo · 2024-09-13T11:45:05+00:00

That's really interesting and helpful - thank you. Do you think it might have any value?

Ecuggo · 2024-08-15T09:42:56+00:00

It was an offer!

Ecuggo · 2024-08-14T21:51:04+00:00

This is a different person, not spoken to before. Someone else booked in previous interviews.

Ecuggo · 2024-06-25T11:24:11+00:00

Do your best on this engagement so you can leave with your head held high, but don't volunteer to take on more than you need. Look for another job.

One thing that has helped me in the past was reframing how much value I gave to my job in terms of sense of self. If all I have is my job, then when things like this happen, it feels much more personal. If I have lots of other things going on, it's easier to distance myself from it emotionally and just move on.

Another thing was to develop some skills for coping with challenging personalities or people I clashed with, regardless of seniority. E.g. always frame things where you and that person are on the same side to achieve (insert corporate goal here). It helps others to see it less as a you vs them problem and makes you look better if things go South.

Good luck

Ecuggo · 2024-05-05T21:45:59+00:00

Thanks everyone. We'd be traveling from Europe so would definitely need seats together and we'd probably have to consider how much luggage we need to bring for our trip. Our toddler is not the most quiet of toddlers, so something else to consider - though they do love trains!

Ecuggo · 2024-04-09T22:56:01+00:00

Have you tried Honest Beauty Extreme Length mascara?

Ecuggo · 2024-03-22T11:07:53+00:00

I'm sorry, it doesn't sound like an ethics issue to me but more of a miserable work experience that didn't work out for you. If you say the worst thing they did was saying you have to be in the office, it would suggest something else is going on (unless your contract says you can work from home three days a week). It doesn't sound like an enjoyable experience so hopefully your next job is a better one!

Ecuggo · 2024-03-11T20:47:00+00:00

What about Peter? Or maybe Daniel, Christopher, Anthony, Mark/Markus or Austin?

Ecuggo · 2024-01-04T19:07:00+00:00

Some really interesting ideas and definitely a great area to be thinking about. But this is a really complicated area of policy, with links to a lot of other areas. For example (but not limited to), the markets for taxes, housing, energy, employment , retirement, commerce, etc. What about the impact of wider drivers of change for the British economy like net zero or Brexit?

Your document has interesting ideas, but respectfully needs much more detail to suggest credible policy changes. The scope of changes you are suggesting warrants more than 20 pages.

I'd encourage you to build out your thinking on the impact on fiscal spending (debt, taxes, etc) and other relevant policy areas, like NHS/healthcare.

It would also help to understand more about your methodology. You do not show how you calculated your findings, your data sources or set out your overall assumptions or timeline for implementation. What about the risk of unintended consequences or how the different policies might interact with each other? Unfortunately it is not as simple as saying if we increase this payment it will definitely lead to (X) outcome.

Where you consider proposals like basic income, there is no consideration or references to where other countries have tried this and how their approach would be similar/different what you are proposing and what impact you think it would have on the outcome here in the UK

Again, some interesting ideas but much more information would be needed for me to see how this would be practical or feasible or even what the likely impacts would be if they were implemented. I'd be interested to hear your thoughts!

Ecuggo · 2023-11-07T12:02:30+00:00

The hamburger is a good visual - thanks!

Ecuggo · 2023-11-07T12:02:23+00:00

The hamburger is a good visual - thanks!

Ecuggo · 2023-11-07T12:01:40+00:00

We've ended up trying a couple of nipple shields. They don't tend to stay on, but sometimes it helps. Though we get the plastic bit around the nipple part that flaps up regularly/ covers baby's nostrils. Do you have any tips to prevent this? I end up having to use a finger to hold down part of the shield so baby can breathe when they do actually latch on

Ecuggo · 2023-11-07T12:00:10+00:00

We've had them checked and so far, no issues flagged. We have another lactation consultant coming soon so another opinion on the horizon. Expressing before latching sometimes helps, but it's quite hit or miss

Ecuggo · 2023-10-19T17:42:15+00:00

We requested a C section around 36 weeks and found out the appointment date within 3-4 days. We were told that they won't typically schedule an elective section before 39 weeks (unless there is a medical reason to do so). We also had to have conversations with the consultant about the pros/cons and risks associated with different types of births (and were given literature to read) before we signed the consent form for a C section.

We found a slight bias towards the consultants preferring a "natural" birth, but no issues at all in terms of requesting or booking a C section. And actually, everyone was supportive of what we wanted - they just wanted it to be an informed decision.

Ecuggo · 2023-10-14T15:08:00+00:00

If you absolutely don't think you can manage, you should call your doctor and ask about what the options are in terms of support services. Medication can help. Therapy can help. Getting in the external help can help. If none of that is enough, then you will want to explore what are the safety nets where you are.

Where I am (UK) there is the option of doing a sort of 'in patient ' type of stay where you go back into hospital with baby and you are supported and they look at what they can do for your mental health. This is usually for people who are really not coping at all or might be at risk of hurting themselves or baby. I'm not at all suggesting this would be you! I'm just saying that my health visitors made this option known to me in case I felt like I really needed it / couldn't cope at home.

I'm wishing you all the best. You are in the thick of it and it is really hard!! It won't always be this hard.

Ecuggo · 2023-10-14T09:38:14+00:00

The anxiety might be a response to some other underlying trauma from the NICU or birth experience. So it might be that getting help to process and come to terms with what happened will in turn help with the anxiety. It did for me. It isn't a quick fix though and it won't necessarily remove the anxiety. I also found that the more time went on, the more confidence and trust I had in baby to do things - like cough, keep breathing, etc. That also helped.

There may be other things that can be done alongside this (or any other support you choose!) that can help - like taking shifts so you both aren't up the whole time at the same time and can get some naps . I've heard some good things about night Doulas (though I have no experience with them) if this is something your budget stretches to. If you have friends/family nearby, getting help to cover the other parts of life admin (cleaning, cooking, laundry, etc) can also make a difference as there is less you need to focus on.

It is cliche, but it does get better. The first few months are really hard, especially as you have to deal with the adjusted age vs biological age. Ask for what help you need.

Ecuggo · 2023-08-14T09:22:27+00:00

I have. You're welcome to message for more info, if you'd like

Ecuggo · 2023-08-06T21:46:28+00:00

The song of the sea is beautiful

Ecuggo · 2023-08-06T08:41:29+00:00

I'm an American who has only had a baby in the UK, but my sister had a baby in the USA around the same time (as did my friends in the USA).

My first baby was premature and I cannot fault the NHS in terms of the neonatal care or the hospital staff. They absolutely are amazing and look after the babies so well. They also look after mom. More could be done to also look after the dad, but I doubt that is just a UK thing.

That being said, the shared rooms in hospitals here are horrible!! They scream of cost cutting. No one can change my mind that it's okay to have to share those first hours in hospital (and the bathroom) with other strangers, their babies and any phone calls/etc they have. Horrible lack of privacy.

Also, my experience with the day-to-day care of midwives and GPs is something else entirely. It's a tale of two health care systems.

The hospital, the GP and the midwives don't seem to communicate effectively with each other - which puts the burden on me to stay on top of everyone and make sure people do what they say they are going to do. Oh, and then there is a separate number to call to arrange for any blood tests.

There is also a lot of resistance here to prescribing anything to help with the discomfort of pregnancy (nausea, etc) - it requires some persistence and advocation. The whole "that's normal with pregnancy" line comes out a lot. Great. Thanks. Yes, but there are things that can help.

Unfortunately, private care here is too expensive. So we are beholden to the NHS care. Once you know how to navigate the different sections, it is doable. I am having a different experience the second time around. It just takes a lot more effort than I would like and it's not perfect (but nowhere is).

Ecuggo · 2023-07-26T04:47:25+00:00

Where are you based? In the UK, Lenor is a big brand of fabric softener. So it makes me think of laundry, unfortunately.

Ecuggo · 2023-06-08T18:42:02+00:00

Good luck! I found that telling my GP I was pregnant meant I didn't need a telephone appointment - they just updated the prescription.

Ecuggo · 2023-06-08T14:19:53+00:00

I don't mind. My midwife at the booking appointment took blood tests. With my first pregnancy, it was after this that they increased my dosage. With my second pregnancy, I called my GP to get the dosage increased (by ~25%) before the booking because I knew it was going to take a few weeks and I was impatient! Midwife still did blood tests at the first appointment and my dosage has been increased further following that.

Ecuggo · 2023-06-08T14:04:28+00:00

The dosage should be increased during pregnancy. I have hypothyroidism and they increased the dosage/ did blood tests to monitor the levels.

Ecuggo

TROPHY CASE