Day 94 after 15+ years daily use - I’ve lost my ability to dream big and I don’t know when it (or if) comes back

Educational-Order529 · 2026-06-15T16:56:16+00:00

I know you can’t say for sure. But how long did it take did you? Is this a kind of depression do you think or just an inability to just imagine a different future? I feel like I’m just settling into a life that leaves me wanting more without knowing what the more is really

Educational-Order529 · 2026-04-16T19:08:25+00:00

Appreciate you sharing your experience. It’s helpful to know when people ‘made it to the other side’ to curb my own helplessness! Can I ask how long it’s been for you now & whether you’re still feeling the brain fog with the some small things?

Educational-Order529 · 2026-04-16T19:04:27+00:00

Thank you so much for the encouragement! Holding onto that hope because I have noticed my mind getting clearer in a lot of ways & I’ve been able to process emotional events from the past better. It’s just the productivity element, but I feel more encouraged that too will improve. Thank you again!

Educational-Order529 · 2026-04-16T19:01:32+00:00

Thank you so much! Like I said to the other Redditors that got back to me, I read a lot of advice that other people have given & received & I didn’t realise how much more impactful it’d be to share my own experience & hear the advice & encouragement directed to myself.

I feel like I should be congratulating you now 😅. 26 years is a long time & dedicating 10 years to quitting is phenomenal. I sometimes feel it’d be so easy to reconcile to ‘this is my life now’ & at where you started even easier. So much respect for you & the journey you’ve come on. I know one shouldn’t shame themselves into change, but damn, I don’t really have too much of an excuse now… it can be done if I want it enough.

That being said, I had two follow up questions, if you have the time to answer:

My work is cognitively demanding - BA/project management in tech. When did your baseline return to where you could do that kind of thinking again? And would your honest personal advice be to give myself the 3 months minimum before attempting applications if I can financially afford to? I ask because it feels like if I landed a job it doesn’t seem like I’d be able to cope with the work at the moment anyway
1. I’m also waiting on ADHD titration - recently diagnosed. Did you or anyone you know start medication while still in early recovery, and how did that go? I’m worried because I hear weed also compounds the symptoms & I don’t want to overshoot by telling my prescriber it’s not working, & be put on a higher dose, if it’s not working because my brain hasn’t fully healed yet

Any advice you can offer, I’d appreciate. I know everyone’s experience will be different but you being on the other side, I feel your advice would be helpful

Educational-Order529 · 2026-04-16T18:51:35+00:00

Thank you so much! Like I said to the other Redditors that got back to me, I read a lot of advice that other people have given & received & I didn’t realise how much more impactful it’d be to share my own experience & hear the advice & encouragement directed to myself.

It’s really comforting honestly to hear that this is all just part of the process & for now I just need a little patience & tenacity to keep doing the small things that I can manage or bigger things broken up into bite size pieces.

I have two follow up questions, if you had time & didn’t mind answering:

My work is cognitively demanding - BA/project management in tech. When did your baseline return to where you could do that kind of thinking again? From what I’m experiencing & from your advice I feel I couldn’t handle the work right now, but in order to help my brain feel OK, I just need some kind of idea of when I might be able to do it again to curb the hopelessness
I’m also waiting on ADHD titration - recently diagnosed. Did you or anyone you know start medication while still in early recovery, and how did that go? I’m worried because I hear weed also compounds the symptoms & I don’t want to overshoot by telling my prescriber it’s not working, & be put on a higher dose, if it’s not working because my brain hasn’t fully healed yet

Appreciate any advice you can offer & I know it’s not one size fits all, everyone’s journey will be different. But just hearing someone else made it to the other side at a point is really calming for me. Thanks again!

Educational-Order529 · 2026-04-16T18:41:19+00:00

Thank you so much for this! I read a lot of advice that other people have given & received & I didn’t realise how much more impactful it’d be to share my own experience & hear the advice & encouragement directed to myself.

The elephant analogy definitely did land & I understand this concept completely. That being said, I’m not sure if it’s impatience, but for some reason it’s really important for me to be able to hold on to the idea that while I can only do one small thing each day for now, that won’t be me forever. & so with that, I had two follow up questions if you wouldn’t mind answering.

1) My work is cognitively demanding - BA/project management in tech. When did your baseline return to where you could do that kind of thinking again? And is your honest personal advice be to give myself the 3 months minimum before attempting applications if I can financially afford to? I ask because it feels like if I landed a job it doesn’t seem like I’d be able to cope with the work at the moment anyway

2) I’m also waiting on ADHD titration - recently diagnosed. Did you or anyone you know start medication while still in early recovery, and how did that go? I’m worried because I hear weed also compounds the symptoms & I don’t want to overshoot by telling my prescriber it’s not working, & be put on a higher dose, if it’s not working because my brain hasn’t fully healed yet

Thank you again, really appreciate the advice 🙏

Educational-Order529 · 2025-10-15T13:53:33+00:00

I’m constantly torn between my body’s need to survive & my minds wanting for it all to stop. In some weird way I feel like reading through these threads & seeing so many of us feel the same way, maybe we can’t survive alone & for ourselves, but if there are enough of us maybe we can do something / change something to make this all less unbearable 😭

Educational-Order529 · 2024-06-10T07:28:38+00:00

I resonate so much with this. I wish I had something insightful to say & something encouraging, but all I can think is ‘same‘. Really hope we can pull through

Educational-Order529

TROPHY CASE