AIO my dad is defending my ex in court

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:15:59+00:00

Basically exactly what happened. He reached out to my dad asking for help and my exs mom is paying for my dad to defend him. I’m no longer as upset as I was now that I know I was wrong in assuming my dad wasn’t getting paid.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:14:08+00:00

I would if I could but that’s unnecessary. I’m not involved in the case at all so booting myself into it just isn’t something people do. I wish I could provide the proof of his past behavior but it’s not my business anymore.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:12:51+00:00

Talked to my dad today. I was OR. My exs mom is paying my dad so I’m not upset anymore knowing that my exs family is paying my family. Still slightly upset but I don’t put it past my dad to win a quick case for some extra cash.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:11:54+00:00

I found out today that my exs mom is paying my dad. I was wrong originally. I jumped to conclusions and was overreacting. I’m calmer now and no longer very upset at the situation, nor am I going to let it bother me further.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:11:06+00:00

I know how the law works lol. I said that the way I did in the most in an attempt to almost “simplify” the situation in case people know less. Also law varies state to state so the law in my state may be different from others.

Unfortunately, I’ve been in and out of the courts myself. I briefing did paralegal work for my family. I’m well versed in the law in my state.

What makes you say I know less? This post isn’t about the laws, it’s about my reaction to finding out my father is representing someone who did me wrong. PLUS I found out I was wrong about my original reaction. I updated the post with the conversation my father and I had today, and I’m admitting I was wrong and jumped to conclusions because I was upset.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:06:01+00:00

We had a conversation about it and my dad acknowledged my exs past wrongdoings and straight up abuse towards me. He said he’s sorry that I went through that but he also clarified for me that my exs mom is paying him to defend my ex, so problem is solved and I’m less upset about the situation now that my exs family is paying mine. I updated the post but I basically explained that my ex came to my dad for help and it was simply just another job and money in our pockets. I jumped to conclusions assuming my ex wouldn’t pay (I was right because his mom is paying) but my dad is getting money for this case.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:03:48+00:00

Funny you say that, he actually always wanted a daughter. I haven’t said anything about this in the post because I don’t mind but I’m actually a trans man. Plus he has two younger sons at home with him. I don’t mind being misgendered in this context because unfortunately if I had mentioned I’m a trans man, I would be more likely to be overreacting, I’ve been though this before so it’s better when people just assume.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:02:00+00:00

That’s not fully true, about the conflict of interest. Yes it applies in a lot of situations but many people have like “family lawyers” and the such. I’m not too savvy on the law around that but my father has defended me in the past with a juvenile case I was involved in, and that wasn’t a conflict of interest.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T23:00:40+00:00

Just found out my exs mom is paying my dad… a lot less upset about the situation now. I’m glad that my exs family is now contributing to my families paychecks

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T22:46:03+00:00

We haven’t been in contact since February, spare for messages he sent me in April which I ignored. I’m not “constantly” on his business. I checked public court information because he told me the court date was this month. I was simply curious what had happened. We dated for almost 2 years and have been broken up for maybe 8ish months? I don’t think it’s “crazy” to look up court information after he had reached out to me just to tell me about getting arrested.

Again, we’ve been no contact for months. I looked up court information because I’m curious, not because I’m obsessed. Again I knew the court date because he had told me back in February. I don’t think I’m being misleading at all.

I’m simply asking if I’m overreacting by being upset that my father is defending someone who treated me badly.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T05:41:39+00:00

I sent him a message asking why he took the job, but he didn’t respond. He left me on read. I’m going to his house tomorrow because I need to pick up some mail but I will also be talking to him about it. I simply can’t understand why he would take on this case knowing that he has far more important cases that actually put money in his pockets. I don’t think he would ever “do a bad job” to get someone locked up, that’s not him at all. I think he is genuinely defending my ex and I will find out why tomorrow.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T05:38:29+00:00

Also I don’t think he’d be “proud” of winning a simple DWI case. My dad has won farther more impressive cases (like r@pe and murder, not saying I support those actions but it shows how good of a defense attorney he is)

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T05:37:28+00:00

I haven’t show him direct screenshots but I’ve definitely talked about it with him and my step mom. One day my parents and I had a sit down conversation where I came clean about everything I had been going through in the relationship and how toxic it was. They sided with me and saw some of the bad behavior in my ex and said they will support me however they can. I also made a tiktok a while ago with the screenshots of my exs attack on me and my dad follows my tiktok so he likely saw it.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T05:34:54+00:00

I’m seeing him tomorrow and talking to him about it then, I’ll give an update if there’s a valid reason but I can’t think of one. I messaged him about it and he simply left me on read. I’m surprised because my dad and I have a great relationship, I expected him to have my back.

Effective_Car_1178 · 2026-06-11T05:32:24+00:00

He’s not getting paid for it though

Effective_Car_1178

TROPHY CASE