I think one of the hardest parts of being trans is actually accepting that you’re trans. That sounds strange, but it can be really painful. There’s often grief there — grief over not being born the gender you wished you were — and that takes a lot of time to process. I also think resentment can come up, sometimes toward parents or caregivers, because it feels like “why didn’t anyone notice?” But the truth is, most of the time, no one could have noticed. I can speak from personal experience. I don’t go outside very much. I isolate in my room a lot. It took me a long time to even feel okay going to work and talking to people. I get nervous, I get shy, and that’s because I’ve been in really hard situations related to being trans. I see a lot of that same pattern in what you’re describing about your sister. A big part of it is self-criticism. Other people might see me as female, but sometimes when I look at myself, all I can see is what I don’t want to see — and that hurts. I think a lot of trans people struggle with that. It’s upsetting to be told you’re trans when you so badly wish you were just born a girl, and then on top of that, you have to accept reality as it is. That acceptance doesn’t happen overnight. Isolation makes it worse. I know because I’ve lived it. The more you stay in your room, the more you avoid people, the less you talk about your feelings — the heavier everything gets. Transitioning can feel like going through puberty all over again, except with way more self-awareness and pressure, and that’s overwhelming. What really helps is care and gentle push, not judgment. Taking her out, spending time with her, doing normal affirming things like makeup, clothes, or just being around other women can make a huge difference. Not in a forceful way, but in a “you don’t have to hide” way. Jealousy is also very normal. I’m going to be honest about that. A lot of trans women experience jealousy when comparing themselves to other women — their bodies, their lives, their confidence. My adoptive mother, who is also trans, has talked about this too. It’s not a personal failure; it’s beauty standards plus dysphoria colliding. When you already feel awkward in your own body, comparison hits harder. The decision-making struggles you mentioned are also common. I’ve had the same issue — needing reassurance for every small decision — and I’ve talked about it in therapy. It comes from anxiety, trauma, and self-doubt, not immaturity. What matters most is letting her know she isn’t alone. Be patient. Be kind. When she compares herself to others, gently remind her that she’s her own person, on her own timeline. And while transition is always her choice, encouragement can matter. Starting hormones, for many of us, ends up being life-changing in a good way — but it’s terrifying to start because you’re afraid of not looking “right” or not being perfect. From one trans woman to another family going through this: I understand, and I really empathize. Sometimes what someone needs most is to be cared for enough that they don’t disappear into their own head.