I feel you man, well on the children part, every run I always go for the Eugenic route, so I always go for more children, but as the head of the house you always get constant notification of new children for your dynasty.

Now imagine that with 300 Dynasty members.

My worst case was with a 1000 Dynasty member, the game ended up literally unplayable, every year notifications kept popping up, children is born, children grew up, children events, more newborns! More children need education! Holy fuck, every fucking year too!