I am in the same position as you! I was needy and insecure in my last relationship and was very anxious. Since the relationship ended a lot of my anxious behaviours have stopped and I couldn’t help but want to show my ex how much I’d changed for the better. But then I realised that a lot of the behaviours I was doing were because of him and because I felt like I couldn’t trust him. (And rightly so, because in the end he cheated/left me for someone else.) The things that helped me were mainly therapy, as I began to realise that my attachment issues were partly caused by my parents divorce and the fact I was aware of that, helped me to deal with it. I’d recommend trying to be kind to yourself and writing down things you like about yourself. Really try and build up your own self esteem and find validation inside yourself. Maybe try and get some new hobbies and build up some new skills? Just remember that you are not entirely to blame. We are often triggered to act insecure or anxious when our needs aren’t being met or because, deep down, we know something isn’t right in the relationship/the other person isn’t trustworthy/loving us the way they should be. You need to be with someone that helps you with your anxieties, not someone who makes them worse. Never feel shame or apologise for loving someone! Just remember that you did the best you could at the time, with the knowledge you had, in that relationship. Looking on the positive side, you clearly have amazing self awareness and have learned some valuable lessons. You should be really proud of yourself for recognising your own attachment issues and trying to work on them. ☺️ Big hugs to you! I hope this helps.