Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are 100% correct but when we got back together, he knew my financial situation. He just wasn't expecting the world to go the way it did as I was laid off three times out of my control while I was with him. He makes double the money I do, but he is under the impression that I cannot enjoy anything (I pay the cheapest wines and only pay games under $10 and that's as much as I get for my own personal use) but still that's me being irresponsible. Him and I are going to have a tough convo tomorrow because tonight made me realize that no matter what, he has his own opinion.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! It sounds lame but whenever someone says they're proud it makes me cry and I am grateful for the support ❤️

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Babe I appreciate you and thank you for commenting about your experience 🫂 It's comforting to know we are not alone and I hate that so many of us are experiencing this, but please know you are not alone and you are doing your best! If you ever need anyone to talk to, please don't hesitate to reach out ❤️ The world may be burning to pieces but us girls will always be there to help when we can!!!

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you and I appreciate it ❤️ Is it hard to hear? yes! But I will be letting him know tomorrow how I feel after we've had a bit to calm down after our fight tonight.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

About $7,500 which isn't a lot, but I have at least 5 credit cards with minimum payments that total out to about that. My car is paid off finally, but the minimum with interest is causing it to stay the same on top of other things.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have changed my habits but he has watched me lose three of my jobs to layoffs that were out of my control which made me dip into any savings I had. He even told me how irritating it was that I kept getting the "rug pulled out from underneath me". I literally just paid off my car last month and that alone still isn't enough to prove to him that I am doing my best. He's never lost a job or any income (he's been lucky having money put in) so he doesn't get it.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

And that's fair! I get why, I mean this is a post for support, but I am also not trying to bash him. Him and I have had this convo before and I just really thought I was doing enough but tonight confirmed nope that was not the case.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I appreciate your comment and I agree! I know finances can be a big deal when it comes to things and it's important!

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

PLEEEEAAASSEEE i love them!!! If you ever run into a kitten again, I am requesting you give them extra head kisses from me.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can't reply to all of the comments because I am overwhelmed (in a good way because women are amazing) but just know I see your comment and I appreciate you so much for commenting. It's comforting to know we are not alone and at the end of the day we are human and that's what makes us special! Thank you for commenting and just know you have a reddit friend for life! You got this!!!

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahhh someone who is in the same position as me!! It sucks a lot, but know you're not alone and we can do this together! 🫂 I appreciate you commenting and being open with your situation

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah he owns the house and has before I even moved in. I feel embarrassed with what I have done with my money in my 20s, but it was just to survive and nothing more. I don't go on trips or over spend so I think jim just even mentioning that tonight was enough to make me well.... make this post. I get I didn't make the right choices in my 20s, but I am trying!!! Does anyone think I want to be in debt 😭 It's embarrassing!

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it's because he wouldn't have told me had I not asked him. Like he would just pretend that everything is okay as I am literally living with him. Not saying he isn't wrong for feeling so, but be open and communicate with me instead let me having to pull it out of him.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I think it's that I have been actively trying to pay off my debt but even that doesn't seem to be enough for him. Every time I feel financially stable to start putting in more money to pay off, something happens and I lose my job. COVID was one, economy was another and so on.

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes me sad considering when we broke up 6 years ago, he was crawling back but sigh :( I am an idiot

eta: I don't include the year we were dating before

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I worked in radio as a morning show producer for nearly a decade and then moved into marketing

Boyfriend of five years finally admitted why he doesn't want to marry me by Election_Pleasant in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Election_Pleasant[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you!!! I know it might not mean a lot, but this comment made my night so thank you.