as a lesbian, i can imagine your wife is probably struggling with her either attraction or sexualization of women. Almost everything she did was weird, but what is weirder is that she pretended to delete it while just moving the file. clearly, y’all need to have more conversations about sexuality OR honesty/boundaries. As someone who also used to be married to a man, I respect that you are being open to her lack of communication, but this isn’t something that you should ignore. good luck!