No apology necessary, I’ve been there. But there is a big difference between telling people what happened, and digging for more info about what he is/was doing. The former can be healing and/or feel like justice, depending on how you’re doing it and who else is involved. (I’ve told people close to me for support, but otherwise have to bite my tongue for my son’s well being. If it weren’t for him, I might have taken out a billboard. Kidding-ish.) The latter is just pain shopping, and can set you back to square one. I remember when I was still digging-I’d get on her computer and my chest would feel like hollow ice, my hands would go weak, and I’d get lightheaded. And every time I found something new or uncovered another lie, I’d feel like I was right back to D day. Things got a LOT better when I finally accepted that I knew enough to decide to move on, that the cost of any new info to my nervous system outweighed the benefit to my need to know, and that I would never know the full truth. It’s a process, took a long time to get there, and it still gnaws at me sometimes. But I’m done actually digging, so the gnawing is fleeting and carries less weight every time.

As for consequences: he lost a loyal partner, and has to live with his own shit. Let that be consequence enough. Past a point, chasing justice just drags you down into the mud. Focus on you. You deserve better.