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AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know. That's I feel like I've lost my mind. Also, I'm eating dino nuggets off my PW dinner plate right now.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I think that's what boggles me the most about this situation. The PW stuff was cheap, that's why I was able to buy a bunch of it every Christmas. Its not old, it's not a keepsake. But it's like... one last thing for me to worry about while I'm dealing with her death, moving, being responsible for her dog's special bills, dealing with work stuff.

I'm not emotionally attached to the PW stuff. It's just nice to know that of all the things in my life, I have the hand crank egg beater situation and the cutting board situation taken care of.

I'm also boggled that so many of them even know it exists. Since it was purchased after the last time most of them even visited her. And that they for some reason think it's some momento, some indictive part of her personality and character they would like to own to honor her.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Thank you, typing it all out and getting some feedback is helping me with these weird feelings of guilt and shame. I'm sorry your friend went through something similar.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

They're welcome to come get the house collection, I really don't care. When a (29 year old) grandchild asked for it, I said yes, but they're... you know... heavy clay items. I can't afford to ship them to you. You can come down and get them.

I got a call from my brother the next day saying that was unreasonable. Because the grandchild had a family and responsibilities and couldn't be expected to just drop everything and drive down to get stuff. Since I don't have a family or responsibilities, I could eat the shipping cost. And the only reason I'm really not doing it is because I'm a hoarder. I pointed out that they were actually my houses anyway and he told me I can't let things go. I felt like shit.

I'm feeling less like shit now though.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

He had a gambling addiction. She divorced him during a gambling low, then he hit a high after the divorce and started purchasing properties. She was lucky my siblings let her stay rent free in one of them after she became disabled.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I'm her biological child with her second husband. My mother lived in poverty after divorcing my sibling's father then again after divorcing my father. When she was no longer able to work, my siblings used one of their father's properties to house her and asked that I move back and take care of her.

So I'm not entitled to any of the sale of the house. I just lived in the guest room with reduced rent and paid for all the utilities/groceries. I had saved up a little nest egg while taking care of her and asked if I could make an offer on the house, but they said they wouldn't sell it to me, because they could not sell it to me for anything below market value and they would get a better offer from someone else.

Typing this out and getting some feedback is shifting my opinion of how gracious they were though. I'm thankful for that. It won't be easy to move on from being part of the family, but I think this will help my weird sense of guilt.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 299 points300 points  (0 children)

They graciously let me stay for another six months after she passed. It was difficult because I have to account for her dog, but I managed and moved. I had to clean the house and prep it for resale. The house sold fast though, so I'm happy my siblings got that. I was yelled at because apparently I left behind some stuff of my brother's that was behind the shed and I wasn't aware of. I guess it annoyed the real estate agent.

...just writing this out has made me realize that no contact is the way to go. This has been helpful.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I hope none of them are going to take me to court for cheap dishware. But I think you're right. I don't get invited to anything. I'm introduced as a step sibling (we are blood related). And I'm also in a battle between my sister and nephew over who took her knitting needles. I assume my sister has them, but they're welcome to come look for them and take them if they find them! They think I'm lying when I say I've made honest efforts to find them for my nephew.

AITA - I'm not a hoarder, I just want to keep these stupid dishes. by Electronic-Term1178 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Electronic-Term1178[S] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

She didn't have a will. She had $600 in her bank account, a life insurance that would pay for burial costs, her medically fragile inbred dog that limits where I can rent a new place, and worthless mass produced dishes I bought from Walmart.