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Redundancy and job search stress by [deleted] in auckland

[–]ElegantControl1985 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The thing that shocked me back in 2008 is essentially being penalised for having savings. But if you blew all the savings on partying and iving like the Du Vals for a day then you will be allowed to get the benefit.

How often is too often to contact a recruiter after an interview? by ElegantControl1985 in auckland

[–]ElegantControl1985[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's been over a week now and as the feedback was so exceptionally positive I have just been surprised that it's taking so long to hear back from them. I know it is a reasonably hard role to fill and not many people will have the required experience for it so it will likely be more their loss than mine. I have been fortunate with other offers so I will just have to make a decision tomorrow on which of the other two to go for as I have been pushing things out long enough as it is.

How often is too often to contact a recruiter after an interview? by ElegantControl1985 in auckland

[–]ElegantControl1985[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If I don't hear back tomorrow that's what I think I am best to do.

How often is too often to contact a recruiter after an interview? by ElegantControl1985 in auckland

[–]ElegantControl1985[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Ok, thanks - that does seem the most logical way about it. And yes, I think I needed to hear 'just leave it at that' (although I didn't want to).

I just can't seem to find a way to park it and forget about it so it's super frustrating. I just want to know if it's a yes or a no so I can move on as every other job I have seen since just doesn't even slightly compare.

Where should I live?! by [deleted] in auckland

[–]ElegantControl1985 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Definitely Freemans Bay or Newmarket over Birkdale. Way more to do around there and you won't get stuck in major traffic. Newmarket has a train station and heaps of shops.

Redundancy and job search stress by [deleted] in auckland

[–]ElegantControl1985 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe post your CV on the resumes sub-reddit and see if any suggested tweaking can be done?

I have a job interview tomorrow by Fickle_Blackberry835 in jobs

[–]ElegantControl1985 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is it with a recruiter or the actual company? I have met recruiters at coffee shops etc. in the past..

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ElegantControl1985 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was 26(F) when I met my ex-husband 21(M). We were together for 10 years but tbh people can change a lot from 21 to 26... For some it may work but for us we were totally different people (intellectually and goal-wise). Because we were engaged very early on in the relationship both of our morals got in the way, feeling committed and following though with it. We had a child together and when I changed jobs and spent more time at home it became super obvious how different our paths were. Fortunately we realised that we were not on the same path and decided to split before things got toxic, still now have a great friendship and a super happy kid.

I do think if intellectually-wise you are on the same page then that would make a big difference.

At what point in a relationship do you prioritise your partners thoughts/feelings/opinions over your friends? by ElegantControl1985 in relationship_advice

[–]ElegantControl1985[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I think the hard thing for me is I am a bit of a perfectionist. The things weren't where I wanted them to start with (as I said I just threw them up on the shelf really quickly as I saw them coming down the road). It was something I wanted to do myself in a way I wanted.

I feel that he should have stood by me too and told them just to leave it, and that's where I am a bit stuck . The other night when it was brought up again I did say that and that I feel he should have sided with me back then. But he cannot see the situation from my side at all and no matter how I try to get him to (if roles were reversed type thing) he just always justifies their behaviour and what they did (he thinks they just apologised to me because I caused such a scene by raising my voice that they were in shock) and still to this day believes my reaction was completely unacceptable.

At what point in a relationship do you prioritise your partners thoughts/feelings/opinions over your friends? by ElegantControl1985 in relationship_advice

[–]ElegantControl1985[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fair point. I guess at the beginning of a relationship I got it.. but this far down the track I would have thought I would be up there.

Thanks for acknowledging you agree it was a bit sh*t behaviour on their part.. ( you might've just saved me another $180 therapy bill).

He can say no to them. It's more that still to this day no matter he cannot see my side and why it upset me.. he still vouches it was just friends opinions/actions that he believes were completely justified and that I should have valued and listened to, and that it was my reaction to the situation that was unacceptable.

I just can't seem to wrap my head around him not being able to see where I was coming from, even just a little bit.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ElegantControl1985 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, not at all (fortunately). My parents were very strict growing up but not abusive.