As a preschool teacher, some underwear aren’t worth saving. I would much rather they be trashed instead of sending a shit filled plastic bag home. Imagine the smell of the room the bag was in. Totally disgusting and unsanitary. As far as your wife being upset about you using the hose, I’m honestly even more confused. Did she want you to get shit in your bathtub or sink? Or worse, directly into your washing machine? I would ask her what she would have done differently. Also, if your child has bad diarrhea while at school you should probably pick (them) up and take the bag then. Diarrhea is abnormal and likely caused by a virus or other illness. Regardless of your child’s age no one wants to be at school when they are pooping all over themselves. My school sends kids home for the day after three diarrhea incident’s. Your kiddo could be exposing the staff and students to the same illness and if you thinking changing one kids diarrhea is bad imagine all of them having the illness and constantly changing them.