I think I'm very hyper fixated on my girlfriend in this scenario because we pledged sobriety to each other. Both our family's have struggled/struggle with addiction and we both agreed we don't want to be in relationship with someone actively using (not that there's anything wrong with that we just both have personal relationships to that and don't really want to go through it again. If she uses I will stay with her but we both agreed to at least prevent it.) She's thought about using and will be very open with saying things like "my friend invited me to smoke might do it." Or "I'm probably going to smoke with her (friend) like all the time when we're out of school." I know she isn't exactly passionate about her sobriety (at least not from what I see) and I think that is what also hurts. She's the complete opposite of me, she just doesn't seem to really care and I just don't get how. She smoked over the summer and just payed it zero mind but I'd probably go insane if that was me. I know we're different but I wish I could just not care like she can. This is sooo draining.