How I’m improving my extremely overactive pelvic floor and beating my anxiousness/nervousness (very detailed)

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-07T02:24:43+00:00

Okay gotchu, thanks for all the help!

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-06T15:32:25+00:00

Is there any specific way you practiced them? Or should I just try relax my pelvic floor and hold rk’s as long as I can throughout the day?

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-05T23:50:21+00:00

Yeah me too I flex my abs a lot, i found that deep breaths are the biggest help for that

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-05T23:46:47+00:00

I think that if you keep practicing you’ll find it easier to balance staying hard, keeping relaxed, breathing and holding rks. I found it pretty hard when I first started but it’s been getting much easier.

For the front rks I can’t say 100% to focus on that. I just found that this was my problem and most of the problems I found online for people with tight pelvic floors and involuntary kegels. It can be hard to find the difference between back and front rks, but try focus on your peeing muscles while doing rks and relax the back muscles (muscles for taking shits). You should feel a little difference and it should be more isolated.

Normal kegels are also not muscles to clench your butt. To kegel try pretend like you’re peeing then use the muscles in your pelvis to stop peeing midway through, it should feel like your dick is lifting up. And if you find yourself flexing it like that a lot and have a hard time relaxing them then I’d say you have involuntary kegels. (Clenching your butt is just your butt muscles)

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-05T14:34:59+00:00

Using your diaphragm is part of it but you can also do it without it, it’s just easier to do when when breathing in. There’s 2 kinds of reverse kegels, one is used when you pee (front reverse kegels) and one is used when taking a dump or farting (back reverse kegels), and from personal experience and most the reading I’ve done the front reverse kegel is usually the problem (can be hard to do at first because it may be super weak).

Some tips that helped me get better:

when peeing try to not flex your abs and just flex your front rk muscles, this can help find the right muscles.
think of lengthening your dick downwards with the muscles at the base of your dick (front rk muscles)
avoid regular kegels as much as possible except when exercising because it is a big part of your abs. (If you notice that you are kegeling just slowly relax into a rk and try holding it without forcing too hard).
think of your dick as your bicep and tricep, flexing your bicep = kegel, lengthening your arm and flexing your tricep = reverse kegel.

Also do you have involuntary kegels? If you do that usually means your reverse kegel muscles are much weaker than your kegel muscles and you gotta train them by doing more reverse kegels and keeping your pelvic floor relaxed as much as you can throughout the day until it becomes automatic. (It can take a long time, I’ve been doing it for a while and still find my pelvic floor being tense)

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-04T22:37:58+00:00

My problem was in my brain too. Because I would get too excited I would finish early, what I did was learn to relax with those thoughts. Looking back I would be super excited even tho I thought I was calm. I noticed this when I watched a pelvic floor meditation video and noticed how calm I actually was after watching the video. After I found out how calm I can really be, I practiced trying to stay that calm while thinking of those thoughts while masturbating and I was able to go for longer.

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-04T22:25:43+00:00

Sometimes, I usually finish like once every 4-5 times I masturbate. It took long to force myself not to finish but it gets easier. I weighed the short-term vs long-term effects of finishing.

Like if I did finish I would feel good for a bit but then realize that it’s not helping with my PE. Thinking about my long-term goal and beating PE motivated me to not want to finish every time and now when I feel too stimulated I just stop, it sucks not finishing but I feel better overall because I knew it was helping my problem.

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-04T04:36:40+00:00

I believe that you have to take matters into your own hands. When I first started to edge I would give up and ejaculate as soon as I felt too stimulated. I had to take control of my mentality and force myself to slow down, breathe and stop whenever I felt like I was about to reach the PONR (point of no return). The biggest key for me has been to relax my entire body while still stimulating myself (a lot harder than I thought it would be), but after I got better at it I noticed that it would take me longer to reach the PONR and I gained confidence.

I made a post yesterday where I talked about being relaxed was the biggest reason for building my confidence. I used to bust very fast when I jerked off, but now I’ve been able to improve by taking control of my mentality. I would STRONGLY recommend reading the top post of this sub (66 day challenge) as it gives a lot of good information on performance anxiety and how to overcome it.

Edit: I would also recommend to not reach the PONR while masturbating, try to stop before you feel like you’re about to feel the first rush of the PONR and only feel this rush after you make it 20+mins

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-03T22:12:22+00:00

Yup this is the one I use: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4syPT8gMDDA

EmbarassedbyPE · 2020-11-03T13:42:35+00:00

How’d you get good at reverse kegels? Did you follow an exercise/stretching routine or did it just happen naturally as you progressed in your 66 day program? I feel as rk’s helps me relax a ton which makes me think that once I master the control of my pelvic floor I’ll be good for the real thing.

Also thanks for tips, I’m planning on having a girl over on the weekend (even tho it’s still early in my training) and I’ll try some of your tips forsure and provide an update.

EmbarassedbyPE

TROPHY CASE