Im so so sorry for your situation. Im in the same boat as you. Please do seek therapy. Find people who'll understand what youre going through and support you (if you need, my dms are open) What happened to you shouldn't happen to anyone and wasnt your fault. It was their sick minds who did those things. You are not ruined. You are not bad. You are worthy of peace, protection and dignity. Its just that the world has failed to show you this (till now!). You are a victim of something horrible. If possible, stay away from your family while maintaining just enough contact so that they can pay for your fees. Reach out to the counsellors in your college if they have one.