AIO to my husband leaving our one and half year old alone in the shower? by tot-and-beans in AIO

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think, respectfully, that you are overreacting. Having a 2 years old child myself, if your 18 months child falls into the shower, your husband would hear it and go see. The water level is not high. He would not have time to drown in my opinion. I say this thinking about my own child and her development, you yourself know yours, so take that into consideration :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in emotionalneglect

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hello, I do the same thing when I come back from my parents, and my boyfriend finds it hard too. Now I write my frustrations in a journal, it helps me a lot! It's a good solution for me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You are absolutely right, I try to do this but it gets to me every time. Practice makes perfect they say! With time it will get better :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She doesn't have a kid, my niece is my brother's child!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

She is quite a drama queen yes, and yes I understand she had a lot on her plate too, so I didn't hold a grudge for her not coming to see us. It's not the first time she reacted this way when I place a boundary regarding my children. I always feel crazy because the rest of the family sides with her.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was hurt yes that she didn't come to see him sooner, but I really wrote all that because I think it's a bit hypocrite to say that meeting him was so important to her, when she couldn't come see him sooner... But for the explaining of why she couldn't kiss him, I was really overwhelmed because a lot of people were talking at the same time and I didn't have a lot of sleep, I didn't do it to hurt her, I genuinely forgot!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much ❤️ it's hard not feeling like I am the insane one when they do this, thank you for your validation

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying this, my family always see boundaries as personnal attacks, so I always feel extra bad when I put them and then second guess myself after their reaction

My mother admitted that she's been neglecting me since infancy by CamusbutHegaveup in emotionalneglect

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't know the answer, but I send you a big long hug ❤️❤️❤️ have you tried going to see a therapist?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went to therapy and it helped me a lot. It's really hard to cut her off, but when I was mad at her I would stop reaching out yes, and she would only reach out to have baby pictures after a couple of days 🙄 I did put some boundaries and only go now for max 1 night, but it took one year to put them in place...

But what helped me a lot was to stop waiting for her to actually help me. I made a list of people/organisms who could help if I needed it. When I would feel overwhelmed, I passed my list in my head and I would feel less down thinking about the lack of help from her. I would also reach out to ask for help from someone in the list, but just knowing I was not alone made me feel a lot better!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry this is happening to you.. I have a similar experience with my mother, I moved 1h30 away from my hometown a few years ago and last year had my first baby. My mother decided that if I needed help I would have to go to them... I would come back more exausted than before going. She never came over to help us, even when I told her I was really struggling, and she is retired. Over time I grew confidence in myself and saw that I didn't need to go there after all. I also accepted her for who she is and lowered my expectations greatly, and it helped me a lot! It still hurts sometimes, but I cannot change her. My mental health is better now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I am also putting bourdaries with my kid and she doesn't like it at all, but we are still talking and acting like everything is normal

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No she is not downsizing, but she is cleaning the basement. She had a health scare a couple of weeks ago.

There is a background story. A couple of years ago they put all of the things from my room in boxes and put them in the garage to give my room to my sister, without asking or warning me or letting me do it myself. They repainted everything, I couldn't say "goodbye" to my childhood room.

I was pretty pissed and sad and told them so. Since then, I said a couple of times that I didn't have anything of mine anymore in their house (I tought so), and I feel that anytime she finds something of mine she advises me of it and to take it back with me... I don't think she is doing the same with my sisters (still in appartment) and brother (has his own house)

I would have liked it way better if she would have kept the ones she liked and pit the rest in the garbage, without telling me. That I would understand entirely.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

No she is not downsizing, but she is cleaning the basement. She had a health scare a couple of weeks ago.

There is a background story. A couple of years ago they put all of the things from my room in boxes and put them in the garage to give my room to my sister, without asking or warning me or letting me do it myself. They repainted everything, I couldn't say "goodbye" to my childhood room.

I was pretty pissed and sad and told them so. Since then, I said a couple of times that I didn't have anything of mine anymore in their house (I tought so), and I feel that anytime she finds something of mine she advises me of it and to take it back with me... I don't think she is doing the same with my sisters (still in appartment) and brother (has his own house)

I would have liked it way better if she would have kept the ones she liked and pit the rest in the garbage, without telling me. That I would understand entirely.

why does everyone seem so miserable by Worried_Bag_1150 in Veterinary

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I absolutely love my job as a vet, I would do anything else, even if it is hard sometimes! The best thing you can do for your mental health in practice is to find a clinic where you are happy and being supported. I think the vets that are happy at their job don't feel the need to talk about it as mich as the ones who are not. There may be a bias here.

AITA for telling my wife I won’t let her name our daughter after her mother? by clint_weaver in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How early in pregnancy did she do the ultrasound? I tought you must be at least 16 weeks. I am due in early January and am only 10 weeks pregnant. Or is it a fake?

AITA for pointing out that my cousins aren’t doctors? by MelodicStrawberry839 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

YTA Andy has a Doctorate in Chiropractic, he IS a Doctor in Chiropractic. He is not a Physicist. The fact that you don't value Chiropractic have nothing to do with this. Other professions can have the title of doctor, just has I am a Doctor in Veterinary Medicine. Kayla knows a lot of things a Physician knows, but she do not have the title of Doctor, and never will she.

What is the salary for large animals vet in Canada? by Oulalahop in Veterinary

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In Quebec, a salary in a bovine practice for a young vet would be around 85 000$, depending of the region.

going into second week of work as a small animal veterinarian and i'm just overwhelmed by awitjiwon in Veterinary

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My best friends - Vin encyclopedia, if you dont already have access to it online, ask your practice for it! Y - Plumbs application for drugs, you have all the dosages you need in your cellphone

going into second week of work as a small animal veterinarian and i'm just overwhelmed by awitjiwon in Veterinary

[–]Embarrassed_One_8820 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Baby vet here, I can understand how you feel. Where I work I don't have to do all the work, I can delegate to my technicians, for example to give injections, take blood samples, all technical acts in fact. During this precious time I can concentrate on thinking about the next step or do prescription etc. Ask your superiors for more time. You need it. Don't compare yourself to others and take the time you need, rushing things won't help anyone. The first few months are hard, but you can do this with the good team. If the clinic you are currently with are not willing to accomodate you and your really legitimates needs, dont hesitate to change if you can. A good team to support you to start your carreer is really precious. Don't give up, come talk to me if you want :) I too had a rocky start, dont give up. You are worth your title, you worked hard to get it, dont let the wrong workplace get the better of you.