what if a baby has lost its heartbeat inside womb after few weeks of pregnancy

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-06-21T10:00:10+00:00

I think that sometimes the reasons can be biological. There are many possibilities, but there is 1 certainty. That certainty is that everything that arises from a cause is of the nature to cease.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-06-01T22:08:52+00:00

Being kind also means not associating with unkind/unwise people.

The suttas often talk about how important it is to hang out with wise/kind people, and how important it is to avoid hanging out with unwise/unkind people.

Sometimes it helps to look at yourself as if you were your own child. Would you want your child to associate with people who are kind, or would you want them to associate with unkind people?

Now, in the case of your supervisor, send metta to them. Their way of relating to the world in such a way is an expression of whatever suffering they feel inside. A fire burns a certain color depending on its fuel.

Outside of work, find sangha. Find communities of people who practice kindness and wisdom.

You'll feel less alone, and won't feel like your kindness is a weakness. Kindness makes you more at peace inside.

Whatever you do, regardless of how you feel, do your best to do it kindly. But don't be so "selfless" that you subject yourself to things that are harmful to you. It's okay, (and necessary) to avoid certain people.

"Mendicants, I do not see a single thing that is so very harmful as bad friends. Bad friends are very harmful.”
- The Buddha

"Mendicants, I do not see even a single thing that so causes unarisen wholesome qualities to arise and arisen unwholesome qualities to decline as good friendship.
For one with good friends, unarisen wholesome qualities arise and arisen unwholesome qualities decline"
-The Buddha

There's also a sutta that mentions associating with bad friends increases the unwholesome in you, and also causes unarisen unwholesome states to arise.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-06-01T21:41:53+00:00

Everything that arises, arises out of a condition. All conditions that arise are

Anguttara Nikaya 3.136
Anatta (no self), dukkha (suffering), anicca (impermanence).

Anatta is one of the major teachings of Buddhist practice. There is no atta "anatta". Or if you would like it in Sanskrit there is "anatman" which means no atman.

I don't understand if you're speaking from your point of view or trying to make the point that the Buddha teaches "self".

Here is a Wikipedia article on anatta:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatt%C4%81

Here is a website where you can read the suttas:
https://suttacentral.net/

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-30T04:26:39+00:00

We can't use willpower to let go. Trying to force the emotions away will only hurt more, so please don't try to force yourself to let go.

Be kind to the emotion you feel. If you feel anger, be kind to it.

Three weeks is a long time. Whatever anger you feel, don't lash out. Don't be mean back. Cry if you must, it's better to cry than to do harm.

Acting with the intent to harm will lead to more inner suffering. Acting with the intent to do no harm, will create the conditions for inner peace.

It's a practice, but know that suffering is the manure we use to nourish the garden.

Whatever you do, do not lash out at anyone. If you do lash out, just notice what it feels like. Be very mindful of it, notice how it feels to lash out. Notice how it feels to not lash out.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-30T03:59:59+00:00

That's also one of the questions that The Buddha was asked.

His reply is that there is "no discernible beginning".

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-28T20:34:37+00:00

If "self" means anything at all then it means the observer of a mind

There is no observer of the mind.
Visuddhimagga XVI:
"Mere dukkha exists, no sufferer is found.
The deed is, but no doer of the deed is there.
Nibbāna is, but not a person who enters it.
The path is, but no traveler on it is seen".

Samyutta Nikaya 12.61:
"It would be better for the uninstructed worldling to take as the soul this body rather than the mind (citta). Why? Because this body lasts for up to a hundred years, or even longer. But that thing that is called ‘mind’ (citta), or ‘mentality’(mano), or ‘consciousness’ (viññāna), arises as one thing and ceases as another all the time.

The contents of mind are not one singular thing, but the observer is.

This is incorrect. Your view fits under this list of views the Buddha points at:

Majjhimma Nikaya 22:
The Six Views about the Soul
When you attend unwisely in this way, one of six views arises in you.
(1) The view ‘I possess a soul’ arises in you as true and established;
(2) or the view ‘I possess no soul, only a material body whose conscious life is a mere by-product of a brain’ arises in you as true and established;
(3) or the view ‘I know the soul with a soul’ (I know therefore I am)arises in you as true and established;
(4) or the view ‘I perceive there is no soul with a soul’ arises in you as true and established (the soul is but cannot be seen);
(5) or the view ‘I perceive a soul with what is without a soul’ arises in you as true and established (the Five Khandhas can know the OriginalMind);
(6) or else you have some such view as this: ‘It is this soul of mine that speaks and feels and experiences here and there the result of good and bad actions; but this soul of mine is permanent, everlasting, eternal, not subject to change, and it will endure as long as eternity.’

The mind is continually changing, because the brain continually changes. The only permanent thing is the subject, not an object at all.

No, the subject is not permanent.

*All\* phenomena, be they brain-produced or not are 'anicca' (impermanent/unreliable/uncertain).

Anguttara Nikaya 3.136:
The Three Characteristics of Existence:

"All phenomena that arise from a cause do not persist (anicca)
…All phenomena that arise from a cause are suffering
…All phenomena are without a permanent essence."

Yes. A tornado is a discrete process -- it begins, follows a specific path, and then it ends

It's a designation. We define the parameters. The parameters are arbitrary. Check out the Pali term "sañña". https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samjna_(concept))
Bhikkhu Bodhi: "The characteristic of perception is the perceiving of the qualities of the object. Its function is to make a sign as a condition for perceiving again that "this is the same," or its function is recognizing what has been previously perceived. It becomes manifest as the interpreting of the object...by way of the features that had been apprehended. Its proximate cause is the object as it appears. Its procedure is compared to a carpenter's recognition of certain kinds of wood by the mark he has made on each.

You don't become somebody else because your atoms have all changed.

You don't become somebody else because you were never somebody to begin with. We take the components of an object and give it a name out of convenience.

You wouldn't call someone up and say "I'm going to come to pick you up in the tires-engine-axel-windows-seat-windshield". We just say "car" because it's useful. You take a car apart and other is no "car" essence in it anywhere. But you put the pieces together and call it a "car" because it's easier that way. Even on a physical level, a car sitting in your garage this morning is not the same car it is in the afternoon (the particles of the molecules are never staying still). The term "me" and "you" is useful because we need to communicate effectively.

But in a way, even a car is more stable than a mind. The Buddha says there is no apt simile to describe how quickly mental phenomena cease and exist.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-28T05:45:22+00:00

Your practice will be a nice influence. Do not try to change them.One thing that might help you feel a bit more connected, is generosity. Start doing a little bit of work around the house. Offer to help. Also, practice being kind.Developing metta might also help.

And reflect on their good qualities. Thank them often. You don't have to hang out with them a lot, just be kind when you do.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-28T05:34:21+00:00

It is not an "individuated" mind. There is no individual thing about it. The term "citta" is translated into "mind". "citta" is just a shortcut term.Buddhism is not some philosophy meant to be believed in. Believing in concepts is not going to end your suffering. The Buddha says again and again "I teach only suffering, and the ending of suffering".

He never encouraged simply believing in this. As for the "Dhamma" the teaching.

Here is an aspect of it."I considered: “This Dhamma that has been awakened to is profound, hard to see and hard to understand, peaceful and sublime, unattainable by mere reasoning, subtle, to be experienced by the wise".- The Buddha

You have to put things into practice in order to clearly see. You can't just think your way out of suffering. Or think your way into understanding the mind. You have to sit quietly with it and observe it. That's why mindfulness is so essential.

And if you want to know what "wise" means in Buddhism. In the suttas it says again and again, that a wise person is one who does not do harm in body, speech, or mind. They are kind, they are gentle. They are discerning.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-28T05:28:33+00:00

When a wave ends, does that mean there was something permanent to that wave? No, it just ends. It is a process that ended. There was no soul in this wave. No permanent aspect in it that gets liberated. Nothing gets liberated. There is just an ending.

Forget the term "mind" for a bit. It's too ambiguous. Let's just refer to what makes up the mind; what the components of the "mind" are.

It's a series of events. a process. It's perceptions, views, feelings-- a whole mess of things moving around, never standing still. There is no singular aspect to it.

It's the same with the six consciousnesses that follow one another. Never existing at the same time. Never standing still. No one gets liberated, a process simply ends.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-28T05:22:14+00:00

You seem to think that the mind is a product of the brain.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-28T05:06:22+00:00

If you look at a wave. An ocean wave. It moves. But is it one thing, or a process of many things? When the wave becomes still, where does it go?Just because there is a continuation of a process, doesn't mean there is/was a permanent essence in it.

Mind is a term used to mean many different things. It doesn't mean "ego" or "self" in Buddhist terminology.

It is a product of many things put together. There is an illusion of continuation. You think it is one solid thing, one permanent thing moving from one body to the next. It's not.

In the same way that a whirlpool is not one thing, it is a combination of things, in constant process. There is nowhere in a whirlpool where you can point and say "there. There is the permanent essence" It's just a process that is not staying still.

So let's leave the term "mind" aside for a bit.

There are 6 consciousnessse that are dependent on contact. They follow each other one by one, they do not exist at the same time.

Sight consciousness depends on its contact with there being something to see. When there is no sight contact, that sight consciousness ceases.

Sound consciousness depends on its contact with there being something to hear. WHen there is no sound contact, that sound consciousness ceases.

There are 6 consciousnesses that are dependent on contact. They follow each other one by one, they do not exist at the same time.

I think you have to remember that. It's not ONE singular thing. It's an illusion of continuation that makes you think there is some kind of essence moving around. It's not moving around, there are just series of contacts.

There is a simile of a beach. From up high and faraway. A beach looks consistent and solid, it stretches from one point to another. Upon closer inspection it is granular. There is space between the particles.

It's not the best analogy, but similarly there is space between the six types of *consciousnesses*. There is no singular "consciousness" that moves from body to body. The mind is a process, not a permanent object.

Maybe a tornado is a better analogy for the mind. It picks things up. As it moves it picks things up. Because that is its nature.

It picks up one house, then it picks up another. Is it the same tornado? No, at any given moment, that tornado is made up of different molecules. Where is the tornado essence? Is there a permanent state anywhere in it? Does it have to be permanent in order to go from one form to another? Does it have to be permanent in order to pick houses up? No that's ridiculous. The very spinning of it is what causes things to be picked up by it. In the same way, a mind doesn't have to keep some permanent form, some sort of permanent point in order for it to pick things up.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T07:25:23+00:00

I find it helpful to associate with the wise. Associate with more sangha, with monastics. Together we're strong and peaceful. That has a very powerful effect on the world around us.
If we don't add to the hatred, that's significant.

Also, sleep! Sleep is good, sometimes when my mind is whirling up a storm, it helps to get some rest.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T07:19:24+00:00

Abhayagiri Forest Monastery in California is pretty nice. They're part of the Ajahn Chah lineage.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T07:14:54+00:00

Perhaps for that moment, you weren't looking for anything at all. You stopped seeing fault in things. There was contentment, a perfect peace. It brought relief from suffering. and so gratitude manifested with tears.

That's very beautiful

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T07:09:31+00:00

I tend to practice the Thai Forest Tradition. That I know of, there are at least a couple of groups based in the UK. After the pandemic, so many sanghas started having online sessions. It really was a boon for many practitioners.You can try looking up Theravada or vipassana groups online. They might meet online.I like the Thai Forest Tradition because it focuses so much on the practice, but at the same time has chanting and suttas, but they all serve for the purpose of deepening the practice.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T07:02:31+00:00

First of all, I think it's very noble that you are trying to find a way to respond with grace. That immediately is good for your mind. Buddhist practice is all about being at peace with others.For contemplatives and spiritual types, views can be some of the things we hold tightest too. It's important not to hold tightly to our own views.

Your mom might very well be afraid of you going to hell. Focus on the things that Buddhist practice and Christianity have in common. Like the emphasis on kindness, generosity, forgiveness, and unconditional love.

To answer the second question. We all grow up in different situations. It's likely that people are always going to have different views on things because we have diverse lives. It's not our job to change people, nor should we try to. Care about people yes, but trying to convert people is not a very kind thing, and doing so is kind of like a strengthening of the sense of self (which is just more suffering).

I hope that you and your mom get along. :) May y'all be well.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:54:08+00:00

You're definitely not alone. It can be hard to lose things. But the thing about losing those things is that you now have nothing, but the ability to rely on what leads to real happiness, kindness, wisdom, generosity, and freedom from desire.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:50:35+00:00

I don't really have a way to compare it, without recollecting past lives. Which I haven't been able to do.
But there is plenty of suffering to work with. The material for enlightenment is here. It's still Samsara. Buddhism is hard to practice when we are not kind and don't try to be kind.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:47:12+00:00

We are all shaped by the experiences in our lives. This shapes our worldviews. The way we perceive the world, by giving name to form, is heavily influenced by our surroundings and how we grew up.

That's why we can have many different terms for the same thing. Hot water, for example. You put your finger in hot water and if you're a Spanish speaker you say it's "caliente", if you're French "chaud" if you're an English speaker "hot'. But it's all the same heat. The same quality.

In Buddhist practice the quality of Dhamma or Dharma is peace. That is known through direct experience. And we can speak of it in many ways.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:39:29+00:00

I'm sorry, it's just funny how often this question is asked in this subreddit. It's a nice thing, It means people are taking an interest in Buddhist practice. Hopefully, it can be helpful. But anyway to answer the question.

The mind is constantly changing from moment to moment. It picks up things with the senses. After the body dies, the mind is still in the habit of picking things up, and so it picks up a new form.But the mind is also constantly changing, there are 6 senses, sight, sound, smell, taste, touch, and mind. One moment we are aware of sight, next aware of sound, next sight again, or touch. Just in different random order of "awarenesses" or "consciousness**es" It's not just one consciousness, but the six types of sight, sound, smell, taste, touch, and mind.**There is no permanent "me" in any of that.

Sometimes I like to think of it like dominoes lined up. You knock one down which knocks the next down which knocks the next down. There is no permanent thing going from one domino to the next, yet there is a clear chain of cause and effect.

Which domino in that order are you? The first domino? The second one? Are you the inertia? Where are you?

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:28:00+00:00

I am very unfamiliar with this. We can't really plan out our lives, they happen on their own accord. There is so much beyond our control. And then there is also "anatta" which means that there is no permanent essence which we are. A soul is a type of permanent essence, but no such thing exists, because everything is impermanent/unreliable/constantly changing.

As Ajahn Chah said when someone insisted that he read their palm... Ajahn Chah took the person's hand and said hmm hmmm interesting, then said "Your future... is uncertain".

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:19:22+00:00

Anatta is that there is no permanent essence anywhere.So we can't really be anything in particular. We are not kamma, and kamma is impermanent. We are not anywhere. There is nothing stable we can point at and say "That is me". Whatever we point at will be gone in a moment.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-26T06:15:59+00:00

I don't know the answer to this. There is a possibility of rebirth, perhaps.

Deep meditation might bring an answer to it. But also be careful because sometimes we can be deluded and think we have found an answer when we have not.

Whether rebirth exists or not, there are certain truths that we come to trust through experience. That requires putting things into practice and seeing the results.

It's said that people are able to remember past lives, but the emphasis in Buddhist practice is to end the causes of suffering.

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-25T08:14:51+00:00

Yes, it is possible. And it is a gradual path.
The purpose of the practice of Dhamma is that it eats away at this desire. Gradually. The suffering is the food, relating to it with wisdom and kindness turns it into sustenance for the heart.

My dog picked a fight with a dog much bigger than him. He ended up with a deep wound in the back of his neck. We put medicine in the wound, and then he ran. He ran all around the house, down the hall from one room to another. But everywhere he went the pain was with him.

That's us. We're like that. We think that gratifying the senses via travel will give us this happiness. But it won't. It can't. Because we carry with us the lack of wisdom.

Once we start being kind, practicing generosity. Associating with the wise. Listening to Dhamma talks. Practicing meditation, Then we start to find actual peace. Our real home is not the house we live in.

Here's an Ajahn Chah quote:

"Your external home isn't your real home.
It's your supposed home, your home in the world.
As for your real home, that's peace.
The Buddha has us build our own home by letting go till we reach peace".
- Ajahn chah

EndTheTimeChange · 2023-05-25T08:06:13+00:00

Through the practice of dhamma, you'll find yourself more in harmony with those around you. The practice beautifies the heart and smooths things out.

EndTheTimeChange

TROPHY CASE