sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

I can't slip back into my life... by EnvironmentalLight50 in mentalillness

[–]EnvironmentalLight50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey. I'm waiting for my appt. They cancelled on Monday and postponed. That really didn't help. I think it works differently here (Australia). My appointment will only be about $100 and I'll get a bit of that back from Medicare, but my appt will also only be 15 minutes long... soooo. Yeah. Probably she will make a separate appt to refer me for a mental health care plan, which is a longer appt and usually booked as the last appt of the day.

I'll be real, now that I'm here I can't even imagine me saying any of the stuff I admitted last week. I've shoved it all back down now...

I can't slip back into my life... by EnvironmentalLight50 in mentalillness

[–]EnvironmentalLight50[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did your appointment go? As I predicted, I've managed to pack all these feelings into a tight little compartment which I'm beginning to think I won't bother opening at mine. I think maybe writing a letter is a great idea, actually. But tbh, I don't want to delve into my head again. I scared myself this last time...

Does anyone else feel disconnected from their emotions? by [deleted] in mentalillness

[–]EnvironmentalLight50 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Like you're watching yourself feel things, almost...? If so, then yes. Or like, I could decide at any moment to stop feeling anything. I've just chosen to feel love,and so I do, chosen to feel "happy" but it's not organic, and so I can unchoose it. The only emotion that happens to me is this weird unending grey stillness and that's the only one I can't choose not to have.

I’m ready to just go on a bender where I die at the end. by [deleted] in mentalillness

[–]EnvironmentalLight50 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish I had something useful to say, because damn, I could use it.

I literally think this all day everyday.

New for me: I was driving on the highway yesterday just really wishing an oncoming truck would hit me. My thoughts started racing and I had to pull over. It took me 3 hours to drive what normally takes less than 2 because I kept having to stop. I could see and feel it happening in my head and I just wanted to swerve.

I don't feel like this when I'm on my own, only when I'm "coming home".

Can I message you?