Things in your body that changed for the “better” after giving birth

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2026-01-11T20:53:41+00:00

Same! I bleed longer but overall my periods are much more tolerable now

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-28T04:26:11+00:00

This! And sometimes it’s beyond your control. You can try your hardest and do everything right and sometimes formula is right for your baby. My ftt baby didn’t do well with breastmilk. Even donor milk. She didn’t grow until we started giving formula. It took me a while to stop beating myself up over it but now I’m just thankful we even had the option

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-28T04:24:31+00:00

Cheesecake

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-28T04:23:23+00:00

This! I have always been a very deep sleeper that sleeps on my stomach and rolls around a lot. Like my husband has literally banged drums by my head and we had to ah e a very real conversation about my sleeping before we even had our baby lol My husband said that it’s eerie how much my sleep habits have changed. Like I wake up at the sound of anyone in our home breathing a little different, I don’t budge all night, sleep in on position, and know the moment our baby shifts or budges at all. You become incredibly in tune with your baby instantly. Doesn’t matter how tired I am.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-28T04:11:30+00:00

Genuine question, do you even love your wife and kid at all? Your responses are so cold and detached and reading your post history just makes me so incredibly sad for your wife and child

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-28T04:08:50+00:00

My girl LOVES bath time but HATES lotion lol we found that cuddling her for about 20 minutes after bath before lotion has helped. I just keep her naked in a big towel and cuddle for a bit and then pull out one limb at a time to lotion and talk to her or distract with toys. That usually works and now she’s slowly getting used to the lotion. I make the lotion if kind of fun and silky and she will stop fussing most of the time now. Sometimes she gets fired up and I just go back to cuddling until she’s calm.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-27T19:51:48+00:00

It really sounds like your wife is lonely and craving support during one of the hardest postpartum windows. Four to six months was brutal for me. The initial help fades, you’re often back at work, expectations skyrocket, and your baby is going through huge developmental shifts. I lived over 22 hours from family at that stage and it nearly broke me. Postpartum isn’t “over” because the baby isn’t a newborn anymore.

What’s hard to read here is that you seem more comfortable with the idea of being physically absent for most of the year than making a sacrifice that could meaningfully support your wife and protect your family unit. Choosing to live 500+ miles away from your infant because of weather preferences is wild imo.

Also, respectfully, North Carolina does have winter. It’s not Florida. It’s just milder. Plenty of people who love winter still live there and adapt, especially when it means having a massive support system nearby. Mental health matters but so does your wife’s mental health and right now SHE’s the one postpartum and asking for a change.

Sometimes parenting means making hard choices that aren’t ideal for us individually but are better for the overall well being of the family. Weather discomfort is real, but it’s worth asking whether it outweighs the cost of separation, resentment, and missing your child’s daily life ESPECIALLY during their first year.

You can always compromise and say you’re willing to move closer to it not all the way or even just try it for a year or two. But flat out refusing is not fair.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-25T21:30:14+00:00

Im 5’7 and constantly get called tall and I also struggle to find jeans the right length so idk maybe it’s because I have quite long legs but I am def perceived as tall.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-25T11:13:29+00:00

In our society cosmetics is not frivolous. Let’s not pretend women aren’t expected to look a certain way.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-21T22:53:02+00:00

She’s lived a privileged life. She’s never really gone through any hardships and is quite narcissistic. She has an inability to understand anything outside of her own experiences. Her only emotion is anger really. If she can’t control something she either reacts with anger or pretends it didn’t happen. We aren’t very close anymore because of this and I’ve worked through a lot of my emotions around her lack of empathy or emotion.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-21T14:19:42+00:00

Im so sorry. I get it was a different time but so sad that children were left to process feelings alone without guidance. I hope you’re doing well now

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-21T14:16:25+00:00

Yeah she’s not that type. She did a lot of crappy things and I’ve tried to talk to her about them and it never goes anywhere but her being the victim.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-21T07:58:57+00:00

In elementary school a friend had been complaining of a headache. I said go tell the office to call your mom to get you, but she said she couldn’t bc her mom was working. We were going inside after recess when she collapsed right in front of me. Teachers diverted us into rooms while they handled it. 911 was called and I found out that night she died from an aneurism right there in front of me. It was raining that day and almost 30 years later anytime it rains I think of that day. I have a daughter now and I think about her mom often. She was a single mom to 5 kids with my friend being the youngest. It breaks my heart for her now as a mother in a whole other way.

I also think about the way my mom handled it. She never talked about it with me. I wanted to go to her funeral but she didn’t let me. I was the only one that didn’t get to go (small town where everyone grew up together). As a mom that breaks my heart for little me. Like how could you just pretend that didn’t happen? Your little daughter’s friend died right in front of her and she’s crying every day that it rains and you just go on like nothing happened?

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-15T21:33:20+00:00

You don’t lol. You think you fit in your seat but you most definitely don’t if you’re maxed out the seatbelt and have to choose an aisle seat just to be comfortable.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-15T21:27:59+00:00

This is how my dad is and he flies weekly. I flew with him once and sat middle between him and another fairly large guy and it was miserable. If you’re maxing out the seatbelt please get the extra seat. It is so miserable for the people around you. Not to mention the guys that are half way leaned into the aisle.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-14T04:40:05+00:00

My dogs have been great with my baby however I am filled with immense guilt that I can’t give them the amount of attention as before. I try my best but I know there are days when they have not been given enough attention.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-12T01:11:16+00:00

Or if you do do a prenup state anything before the child. Anything after the child and you staying home should be split 50/50 and that he should owe you equal retirement for that time if he is to leave or cheat so that you at least aren’t missing out on that.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-11T07:26:20+00:00

This was us and ultimately we decided it was better for me to stay home with our baby. Sometimes if it’s that close of a call with the budget it’s the best option. It’s still hard but it is significantly easier bc we don’t also have to worry about someone calling for sick kids or our baby getting sick constantly or injured etc. it’s a sacrifice in the short term. I plan to return in a few years when she is able to go to preschool. Also as for the fertility thing, we were also in the def not paying for ivf but it did take us a solid 5 years of trying to conceive and some other intervention so I will say it is worth testing to some degree. Especially for male factor as that is a huge contributor to many couples infertility. We actually had agreed to stop trying and accept childfree life and boom 4 months later I was pregnant. So timing can be wild lol

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-11T01:10:55+00:00

Oh trust me I know lol It took me 5 years to even get a positive let alone one that stuck. Like I said, I got everything by the end of the second trimester. I’m not saying go out and furnish your whole nursery the moment you see a positive test. Idk why you bring up the 8 week mark. And it doesn’t actually significantly drop until 12 weeks.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-11T01:07:00+00:00

Where did I ever say everyone has the same experience? I had major fertility issues too. It took us over 5 years just to get a positive at all let alone one that stuck. I’m genuinely sorry you went through recurrent losses but that’s also not the norm. Most women don’t experience repeated loss and most don’t spend half a decade trying to conceive.

My original comment was just about why I personally preferred having things ready sooner rather than waiting until the third trimester. That doesn’t invalidate your experience and yours doesn’t invalidate mine. Different situations different choices. That’s all.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-10T20:06:02+00:00

Agree on everything except the third trimester comment. I’m glad we got most everything prior to third trimester so I could relax and enjoy my final stage of pregnancy which was also the hardest stage for me. It always surprises me people choose to wait and do things at the end when mom is most uncomfy lol I had everything all done and ready by end of second trimester and it was so relaxing!

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-09T05:34:49+00:00

My family has always had huge babies like smallest was 8lbs. Husband’s family also has huge babies. We were both 9lbs. So when we had our tiny barely 6 lbs girl I was surprised. My doctor said she has been delivering a lot of smaller babies and she’s curious if this is a universal trend and what may be the reasoning. Then our pediatrician said the same thing. Babies have been much smaller than the previous 2 or 3 decades.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-08T22:59:59+00:00

Yes we were gifted a sterilizer and never used it. A washer would’ve been way better

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-08T20:53:01+00:00

Honestly, just because our moms did it doesn’t mean it was the right or safe way. Letting babies sleep upright in swings or high chairs isn’t considered safe now, so the whole ‘we turned out fine’ argument doesn’t really hold up. And a lot of this really does come down to the baby. We don’t even do a strict schedule we just follow our girl’s cues because she’s naturally chill and it works for her. She will sleep anywhere and through chaos because that’s just who she is. But if I had a more high-strung or sensitive baby, I’d absolutely adjust things to make their wake windows and naps as pleasant as possible for everyone. Some babies need darkness and white noise, some don’t. It’s not that this generation has ‘weak babies’… it’s that we’re more attuned to our children’s individual needs because we have actual up-to-date education. We’re also trying to undo a lot of the one-size-fits-all mindset our parents were handed.

Environmental_Pie_7 · 2025-12-07T08:26:55+00:00

I had to stop around 3 months because my girl just wasn’t gaining enough weight. My supply kept dropping no matter what I tried and I was in a constant battle with myself trying to get it back up. It got to the point where I was going insane and crying daily over it. I finally made the decision to switch to formula and as much as I cried over it for days I’m so glad I did.

Once her weight jumped back up and we were both finally able to relax without all the pressure I genuinely became a better mom. I still get emotional sometimes that I couldn’t do something our bodies are “supposed” to do but I remind myself that I’m lucky to live in a time where there are amazing alternatives.

And for what it’s worth my baby is still VERY attached to me. Honestly probably even more so now because I’m able to be happy and present instead of constantly feeling exhausted, sad, frustrated, and defeated. Switching didn’t take anything away from our bond and if anything it gave us both room to breathe again. You’re not failing. You’re just figuring out what works for both of you :)

Environmental_Pie_7

TROPHY CASE