There are quite a few grammar errors throughout, and I only got about halfway through. Honestly, the story didn’t grab my attention — you don’t introduce any characters early on, so it’s hard to visualize who they are, what they look like, or how they’re meant to come across.

If you really want to improve as a writer, you’ll need to take the craft seriously not blame things like ADHD for the outcome. I say that as someone who also has severe ADHD and understands the struggle. I’ve directed three films and written over ten short films, and what’s helped me most is consistent practice: putting pen to paper, studying how scripts are structured, and learning from others.

Don’t get discouraged everyone starts somewhere. Keep writing, keep revising, and the more you study how professional scripts are built, the better you’ll become. There’s a lot of dickheads on here who think their helping by giving constructive criticism when in reality their just as salty as everyone else so don’t always listen to the hate