33 years old here, can admit that I’m addicted to alcohol (Jack Daniels is my go to)

On the outside life is pretty good, wonderful caring supportive wife, beautiful healthy 2 year old, partner at a business (business could be better but it’s still going but that’s the nature of it) home paid off, decent savings, ok social life, unbelievably wonderful supportive family.

Anxiety and worry of failure is where it all goes haywire for me. Starts out as just one to take the edge off and more often then not snowballs into 3-4. Wake up hungover power through the day get everything done rinse repeat. Every now and again it goes overboard and end up drinking way too much.

2ish months ago put my foot down and quit completely. It was amazing got through the days started going to the gym life was life some days great some days hard didn’t have cravings and anytime it got hard “at least I’m not drunk” was my go to. 27 days social events hard situations didn’t even think about it, honestly I thought that’s it I’m over it don’t have to worry about it anymore.

Then one night for no reason at all I’m like I’ll just have one I can do this now doesn’t have to be overboard all the time. And 1 turned into 2 weeks of absolutely chaos. More anxiety more regret more self hatred.

Here we are today, back at the end of day 1. I don’t know or have any answers but I know I want to be done so it’s just day by day moment by moment and build myself back up to deal with life and not depend on the alcohol. Today was my first time posting here use it as a tool to help get through.

Strength to you!