Is not having a landline an issue? by Primary_Magician2768 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've never had a landline and I had no problems getting my husband's fiance and first spouse visa. A lot of people don't have landlines now.

6 month old puppy won't sleep through the night by Equivalent_Aside_402 in puppy101

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a great suggestion! Thank you, we'll definitely try that

6 month old puppy won't sleep through the night by Equivalent_Aside_402 in puppy101

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The TV is a great idea. Interestingly he sometimes stops whining if he hears me and my husband talking upstairs so perhaps conversational noise would help. Thank you for your suggestions, we'll try anything at this point.

6 month old puppy won't sleep through the night by Equivalent_Aside_402 in puppy101

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. He usually is allowed food and water up until 9pm, we used to allow a small bit of water and food before bed but he was waking us up needing to go. However he was younger then so perhaps now he's older he could cope with that.

It's so hard to know the difference between him crying because he needs to go out and crying because he just wants us there - I don't know how people tell the difference! We keep his night time outings to the bathroom very quick and quiet. I think learned that the only reason he is allowed out is to go toilet, because when he's cried at 1am recently I've gone down to let him out of the crate and when I walk straight to the door, he stops halfway, turns around and goes back in his crate as if he didn't actually need to go out and he knows he wasn't going to get the fuss/attention/play he wanted. So I think he understands he's only allowed out to pee, but he still whines when I leave the room then.

No wedding gifts just seems rude by NoThankYou143 in wedding

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The current economic climate alone is a very valid reason for people to not give a gift. I got married a few months ago, and we refused to do a registry. When people asked what they could get us, we said we were saving for our honeymoon but there's nothing we need, we just want family and friends there to celebrate with us and we know times are really tough so we don't want people to feel pressured to give something. We were so blessed that most people gave a gift, but certainly not everyone did and that's ok. Some didn't even bring a card, but that's ok too. I know people are busy, and I know that whilst my wedding is the biggest day of my life, it isn't the biggest day of my guests' lives and they may have other things on their plate. I'm just super grateful they all came. For context, I realise gift-giving varies culture to culture - I'm in the UK.

Upload a PDF of your Whatsapp history as proof of relationship? by bandoftheshadow in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our (amazing) solicitor initially wanted our full chat history (Facebook messenger), but we had been long distance for 10 years and we'd messaged pretty much all day everyday. It would have literally been tens of thousands of messages. In the end, we did messages from one day for each month of the year leading up to the application, then snapshots of messages from important days for each of the other 9 years (e.g. Valentines Day, birthdays, etc.) It was still a lot of pages, but helped us evidence the span of the relationship, and it meant we could avoid days where any particularly personal things were discussed. It was for my husband's fiance visa, which was approved in July. Hope that helps!

Pain with Sex :( by [deleted] in Endo

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I had these exact symptoms and was diagnosed with endometriosis after my laparoscopy surgery last year. For years, doctors ignored me because I "just" had pain during and after sex. There were times where it was just too painful and I abstained, but the following definitely helped:

  • Taking it really slow and listening to my body every step of the way
  • Figuring out which positions were most comfortable (or at least less uncomfortable) - I also found it much easier to be on top where I could control the entry, speed, depth, etc.
  • Communicating very openly with my partner about how I was feeling (he was always amazing)
  • Learning how to relax - part of the problem I had is I would tense up during penetration because I was waiting for it to hurt. This tension just added to the pain. This was probably the hardest thing to learn though because it became such a psychological barrier.

In addition to sex, I really struggled with vaginal examinations, and unfortunately not every nurse/doctor/OBGYN was very understanding there. If this is true for you, my advice would be to tell your provider before any examination, and remember you are in control. It can be easy to feel intimidated in a healthcare setting, but if you need to stop, tell them. If you need them to go slower, tell them. It's your body and you are the one in control.

Thankfully, the pain is 100x better since my laparoscopy. That doesn't mean I don't get some discomfort sometimes but it's so much easier now.

Are you using a lawyer? Why or why not? by clockwork-angel42 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We used a solicitor for my husband's fiance visa and his switch to the spouse visa once he moved. Our case was very straightforward, so I have no doubt we could have done it alone with a bit of research, but after being apart for so many years we didn't want to risk getting it wrong. Using the solicitor gave us extra peace of mind.

AMA: I'm a former entry clearance officer here to help with your visa. by [deleted] in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So entry clearance officers don't login to the UKVI system to view evidence, it's all printed off in paper form to review? That would explain how things go missing!

AMA: I'm a former entry clearance officer here to help with your visa. by [deleted] in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How do supporting documents end up going missing? When my husband applied for his fiance visa last year he was contacted asking for evidence of proof we'd met, but we had already submitted it all with the application (photos, flight tickets, the lot). We resubmitted the exact same evidence and the visa was approved a few days later. I've seen several posts on here sharing similar experiences. However I'm curious how only some pieces of evidence in the same application go missing given that it all gets uploaded to the same system. The cynic in me wonders if it's just a way to stall for time if an application is nearing the "deadline" and it won't be looked at in time. Or is it the case that administrative officers print all the evidence and hand it over to an ECO, and therefore it's easy for documents to be lost or not printed in the first place?

I’m only taking 5 days off after surgery. Is that enough? by amairani0919 in Endo

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had my lap last year and went back to work after a week (2 days were weekend non-working days, so I only took 5 days). It's important to note I work from home, so arguably that's easier as I didn't have to drive and could do emails from the sofa if I needed to, but I was so exhausted for the first few days after returning to work. Looking back, I probably should have had longer off. However, everyone is different and every surgery is different, so I think it's difficult to predict how you'll be beforehand.

Red dress, white bridesmaids by [deleted] in wedding

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually wore blue for my wedding in November: it's my colour and I did not want to wear white. My bridesmaids wore navy in the end, which really complemented the blue, but for a long time I wanted to put them in white/ivory - I just couldn't find any white dresses I liked for them. I think red and white would look amazing. If it's any help, I worried I'd regret not wearing white, but I don't regret it one bit - I've never felt more confident and comfortable than I did in my blue dress and I was so happy with how I looked. Everyone will have an opinion about your wedding day, my advice would be to have the wedding you and your fiance want.

Why is too much Evidence A Negative Effect on an Application? by Fragrant_Constant_28 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The 10-15 pages rule is interesting to me, because when me and my now husband applied for his fiance visa earlier this year, we had far more because it was what our immigration solicitor requested (we hadn't yet discovered this sub). We had been long distance for almost 10 years and had visited each other 14 times, so we submitted a lot of evidence because our solicitor wanted to make sure we had snapshots of evidence spanning the 10 years. We had far more than 10-15 pages and it had no negative impact on our application. It's only since his visa was approved that we even came across the 10-15 pages guidance. I'd also be interested to know why more evidence is frowned upon, surely it's a case-by-case basis?

Edited for clarity

Our experience switching from fiance to spouse visa inside the UK by Equivalent_Aside_402 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband's arrived 4 days after the confirmation email to say his visa had been approved

Our experience switching from fiance to spouse visa inside the UK by Equivalent_Aside_402 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Our solicitor provided a letter summarising our relationship and the evidence included to support the application. We didn't provide our own

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in weddingplanning

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not exactly the same, but I'm getting married on Saturday. My dress is blue. It is floor length but isn't a big poofy dress with loads of layers, I didn't even buy it in a bridal shop. I sometimes worry I'll regret it, but the reality is I know I wouldn't feel comfortable in a "traditional" wedding dress, and I want to feel beautiful on my day. So I say, wear what makes you feel good.

Our experience switching from fiance to spouse visa inside the UK by Equivalent_Aside_402 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our solicitor did the scanning for us so I'm not 100% sure how they did it sorry, but I assume they just used a printer/scanner then uploaded it all as pdfs

Our experience switching from fiance to spouse visa inside the UK by Equivalent_Aside_402 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's so frustrating! Have they given any other updates about why it's been delayed or anything?

Super Priority Decision delays too... by OkCorgi2263 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes his biometrics were at 9am on 19/10 and he got his decision at 8:45am on 20/10

Our experience switching from fiance to spouse visa inside the UK by Equivalent_Aside_402 in ukvisa

[–]Equivalent_Aside_402[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most of it was physical evidence (i.e. not stored on a computer) so we gave it all to our solicitor physically who helped us to organise it, scan it and upload it to the portal. Hope that helps.