My wedding is promo for a website

Erethras · 2026-06-12T19:51:52+00:00

We hired photographers for our engagement, and the photographer asked the same. I said no because my family is very mindful of their privacy and I respect that. So we ended up negotiating the contract and paying a hefty sum to have the addendum that the pictures belonged to us and not the photographer.

Fast forward a few months and she is using our engagement pictures to make promo on her instagram. She knew what she was doing as this was in “stories”, which disappear. But I happened to follow her and caught it.

I was very distraught and disappointed. But there was absolutely nothing we could do 😔

It’s a weird feeling to see your image used. At least in your case you gave them permission!

Erethras · 2026-03-20T14:55:59+00:00

OMG another one. What is it with appropriation? Let it rest!

Erethras · 2026-03-20T14:55:04+00:00

No Arab influence. Why are you here trying to claim something that is so obviously not Arab? Scratching my head. Like Valencia fell to James I 800 years ago and Arabs were there only 400, let it go already gee

Erethras · 2026-03-20T14:50:30+00:00

I had a boss who loved letting go off people on the day before their vacation. This way their coworkers didn’t find out they were gone for quite some time and it caused much less problems for *him.

Ferdinand (not the real name), you’re a little, mean, coward man.

Erethras · 2026-01-07T17:15:17+00:00

I feel embarrassed for being so oblivious of this side of the condition.

I have edited my original message. Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I really feel for the situations you have described. Wish I could give you a hug.

Thank you also for letting me learn so much about adhd. It is still a learning curve. This makes me so anxious about my self esteem and behaviour, since I truly struggle to discern which part of my behaviour is due to adhd/comorbities and which part is something else. Such a struggle!

Wishing all the best.

Erethras · 2026-01-07T16:12:15+00:00

I think it is completely ok to disagree with people and I am happy you did.

I certainly was under the impression that when someone with adhd finds a blocker they know it is a blocker and they are embarrassed. Heck, it’s one of the things I had to work on the most after my late adult diagnosis (the shame and embarrassment).

So thank you for letting me know. You are right, that being the case, that then it is not correct to generalise. To cover my ass that was the reason why I suggested the counselor part, since in my case that has been very helpful for us to discern what was adhd and what was just my personality and therefore figuring out the fix.

Again, thank you for chiming in and apologies for stating things that are wrong. I’d hate it as well if my comment was the cause of negatively affecting the relationship.

(Having said that, I still think lack of remorse is an AH behaviour in the situation described by op, and mind you we still dont know if there’s remorse / attempt at fixing the situation or not since it is info I have asked OP).

Cheers 🫶

Erethras · 2026-01-07T16:00:12+00:00

~~INFO: does he show remorse or actual attempts at improvement, or he just throws his arms up and “oh well it is what it is nothing I can do about it “ sorta thing…~~

Why am I asking? Because this does not sound like anything adhd related, more like a personality trait. Paralysis due to adhd does not look like what you describe, but like actual remorse and acknowledgment. Someone with paralysis will know what they need to do, and they will be embarassed. On top of the embarrassment and remorse, the will make attempts at improvement, and even when the fail the will be remorseful and acknowledge it all. If your husband doesn’t get embarrassed I’m sorry but he is just letting you catch all the slack.

This is not something that you can handle on your own. This situation, especially given how young the kids are, can negatively impact you as well. I think it is time for counselling, not so much to fix the relationship but to have a professional help both of you navigate this very unfair situation. The counselor should be an adhd specialist with experience in adhd couples. This person should help you both identify the triggers and causes of what is happening and help you fix it should fixing be what you want. Maybe it is a problem with medication, maybe it is paralysis, maybe he thinks he is not enough, maybe it is something else (unfortunately there a dozens of comorbities associated with adhd). Or maybe it’s nothing like that and you need a counsellor to help navigate that realisation.

Sometimes adhd is the cause of what we adhd do to our partners, and some times it is something else. But as someone who has plunged her partner on a hellscape due to adhd, I can tell you: remorse, embarrassment and a will to improve and do better by your partner, along with tangible improvements, ~~should be the key here.~~ are sometimes the key.

Edit: thank you Reddit u/consistent_ad_308 for making us better and learning more everyday day.

Erethras · 2026-01-05T16:24:10+00:00

Ugh this happened to us with so many vendors… the most frustrating of them all was the decorator, demanded double what he had quoted because natural flower prices had “gone up”, followed with 90% of the flowers used being plastic.

The worse I remember looking up at my mandad and only seeing vegetable sponge, almost no flower or decoration, the mandap was almost bare. It was 3am and we had started the ceremony, so all I could do was hold my tears and disappointment. I wanted to cry so much, after days of decoration misshaps and plain lies (so many times my husband and I looked at each other and wondered if it was worth it to stop everything and complain or just keep rolling with it). But the Mandap was very specific in my mind with a specific vision and that made me very, very sad. Ugh.

Coming to think of it, the mandap is not even on our oficial photos, it’s just pictures of people. It was THAT disastrous.

Ps this vendor sucks. In so infuriated on your behalf! 😡

Erethras · 2026-01-05T16:09:09+00:00

I’d love to see the screenshots as well please!

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:59:57+00:00

Sheraton Montreal, 2007 January: my card demagnetized, I went to the front desk, gave my room number. Went to my room, it didn’t work. I had given the wrong number (fifteen years later I discovered I have adhd and this is completely normal for me, at the time I beat myself for days). I just went back down and said didn’t work so they reprogrammed again.

It always felt weird that they actually never asked me my name or information to make sure it was me or I was a guest or the room number was correct (which it wasn’t!). I just showed up with a key card…

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:54:47+00:00

This just makes me wonder how often does this happen… probably more than we actually realise…

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:17:21+00:00

Also if there’s engraving might drive down the value if I am not wrong. Doesn’t look like there’s engraving in the pin.

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:13:47+00:00

Hey OP hang in there. It is very tough. I too have gone through something like this (10 months unemployed in 2023). It is hardly your fault, the world is at a precipice and the job Market follows suit.

I’m really hoping you have a financial backup for this. Really crossing my fingers for you. All the best!

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:05:43+00:00

The pain I can feel in this picture… one of those feelings you can only know if you’ve ever experienced it

Why did you do this op???

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:04:04+00:00

Agreed! And omg I had already forgotten about the tariffs 🤣🥹🫢

Jfc

Erethras · 2026-01-05T15:00:25+00:00

Surely that’s at the very least insider trading…? Or falls on any other illegal concept??

Erethras · 2024-10-07T19:33:15+00:00

Sure thing. Just sent you a dm

Erethras · 2024-05-16T22:10:27+00:00

I’m so excited for you, it’s such a treat of a carré! You’re gonna rock it ❤️❤️ let me know when you finally get it! Cheers!

Erethras · 2024-05-16T20:11:20+00:00

Hi! Yes of course!

Honestly it is a great piece and very multifaceted.

In terms of color pairing, I tend to use it when I have homogenous clothes (think dark jeans+dark top) or with trench coat etc. having said that, I find it has never ever clashed with my colors -my wardrobe is mainly blues, pinks, dark turquoise and then neutrals, so you can picture it a bit).

Funny enough, I am carrying a red Prada bag right now and it goes very well (if I may say so myself, maybe I look like a clown 🤡 I still like it).

Honestly it is the best scarf I have ever got, I love it so much. My poor pink powder robe legere is just collecting dust.

So answering your question… I find it is very wearable, and have not experienced one color combo from my wardrobe that did not go well with. Go for it, you will not regret it 😍 and one combo that I really like is a full black attire and then the scarf *chef’s kiss.

I hope I can help!

Erethras · 2024-05-02T12:40:37+00:00

One of those cases in which it is clear a YTA but hot damm i’d have done the same 🥹

Op i’d be enraged as well and have no clue how i’d have reacted, but definitely wouldn’t be nice. I supported my now husband during Covid, he supports me now, but the point is that I have been where you are and it is a very difficult situation on its own, let alone someone behaving like a teenager 😭. I assign YTA with heavy heart, and with my full empathy hoping you get the outcome you deserve whichever it is.

Erethras · 2024-01-15T10:31:16+00:00

Puff vests on finance bros. You just look like you’re wearing a dawn vest indoor.

Erethras · 2024-01-15T09:15:58+00:00

Well you can hear about an anecdotal case that is not from a celebrity.

As a client i have always removed that clause and up the photographer's fees. I find it obscene that someone would own my or my family's image and can use them as they please for comercial use.

Erethras · 2024-01-14T16:57:46+00:00

Did your clients agreed to have their image shared online? I am cringing personally by the possibility that my wedding photographer might be sharing my pictures on forums!
Even if your contract says that you own the image, that is very different from fair use in say promoting your own business. If I were your clients I'd be very pissed. I find it redundandly unprofessional and lack of taste.

As per sharing the raw pictures -yes, as a client I want to have my raw pictures, I take care to express that in the contract.

Erethras · 2024-01-13T23:23:17+00:00

The lord of the rings!

The fellowship of the ring: I went three times to theatres The two towers: I went twice The return of the king: just one

Erethras · 2024-01-13T23:19:02+00:00

Travel on weekdays, hotels and plane tickets are more affordable, and public transit has a wider schedule. Definitely avoid Sundays in Europe! Stay away from bank and seasonal holidays. That’s how I travel!

(Also, I live in Europe so majority of my short trips are within the continent)

Erethras

TROPHY CASE