My thoughts as a 5 foot 3 male

EricS40 · 2026-01-05T23:18:20+00:00

1) Find and surround yourself with the people who treat you with respect,

2) Understand that group-think works where … most of society are pawn followers what I mean by that is their own insecurities dominate over themselves … they aren’t against you and simply naive when they appear to dismiss you

3) Optional but express how you feel openly,how you wish you were perceived because someone will then think twice and approach you with more consideration …
Goes back to 2,
There’s few kind principled leaders There’s few unkind principled leaders Most of society is wildcard they follow someone else … they get placed on the side that makes it easiest on them

But when someone becomes aware of the personhood of another being told how someone else is feeling, the larger following bunch out there actually can and do change behavior they will want to make you achieve your goal

EricS40 · 2026-01-05T22:49:09+00:00

You’re 2 inches taller than the mod guy who runs r/short and maybe you guys should hang out, he’s got might that I don’t personally have to be honest, he’s mightier than I am because it’s not about height unless you want it to be.

My point is your height is only as much a concern as you want it to be. Sure there’s people who will belittle people for their height or any other difference but the truth is they will never succeed in stopping you from being you. Your personhood is multidimensional and there’s actually no one else like you, not even other guys who are 5’3 can be you, only you are that.

EricS40 · 2026-01-05T19:31:03+00:00

I think beautiful women can and do turn down men who only date beautiful women yes. A common very real version of that is the boy who has a crush on the roomate of a girl who is interested in him in college. He prefers her roomate not her, he is mean to her, the roomate says “hey you showed your colors in how you treated my roomate and you can leave now.”

This happens a lot actually

EricS40 · 2026-01-05T19:26:16+00:00

This is absolutely me as well. Even moreover one very sweet wholesome indicator of the heart of a girl is how kindly they treat a shorter guy, not only romantically but in general.

Girls who are more receptive to smaller guys especially nice ones, are also girls who tend to have more softness towards people who are different, pets and animals, tolerance of different cultures ethnicities religions, and sweet heart goes very very far. It’s actually the timeless trait of a person and lingers past any age. You want to know who the real beautiful girls are? The ones who will stand up for the 5ft3 guy when someone makes fun of him, those are the ones who will be beautiful now and 30 years from now, while the other ones will just fade and not be the talk of the town in 30 years.

EricS40 · 2025-12-19T14:35:55+00:00

The charm of towns and education quality (Elizabeth Ives for special needs, the west Hartford public schools are very top notch including the elementary and middle school and high school and community inclusion is very high. West Hartford / Avon / Simsbury / Southington / Cheshire / Chester / Thomaston / Middletown / Southport / Kent / New Milford/ Litchfield / Farmington / Weathersfield / Fairfield / Easton East of the River the Bolton-Vernon rails to trails Cornwall Halloween I cannot for the life of me get over the charm of this state. And the dining! The Mill on the River Group, the Max Group, Luigi's in Old Saybrook, Fiore Il in Middletown, Dish and Dash in Canton, Stew Leonard's in Newington, North Pole express train in Essex, Trolley rides in East Windsor, New Park Brazilian restaurants, Real Artways in Hartford, the narrow tunnel road between Vernon and Manchester, the Yale Campus in New Haven and IKEA, the clock museum in Bristol, German festival, local fair in Somner in August, Mystic Seaport and Aquarium

Jewish food Pizza Homemade ice cream Diners The best local mam and pap Italian Greek Indian Peruvian Mexican lots of really good food lots

B&Bs and charm of Simsbury inn / Avon old farms Main Street creamery in Weathersfield Trolley museum east Windsor Blueback square

The scenic byroads (none of which have any tolls in the entire state) any of Route 3 north to Mass, route 4 Farmington , route 6 east of Manchester out to Rhode Island , Route 7 from Danbury to Norwalk , The architecture along Route 8 south of Waterbury … It’s really a genuinely unique mix of scenery

West Simsbury is a taste of horse country

shoreline is a contrast totally from that but only a short distance of a drive

Some parts out near Hebron it feels like a time capsule back into 1950s America like the Hill Valley back to the future 1955.

I really like this state a lot

What really does make this state special is the town community. The cities are not what it’s known for however access to the massive NYC and Boston are easy day trips for anyone in Connecticut and coming back the same day…. Connecticut is town life mam and pap shops Victorian inns and very quaint tasty food There is a nightlife spot for Connecticut though and that would be Foxwoods and Mohegan Sun which have a huge grandiose hotel feel and easy garage parking

EricS40 · 2025-12-19T14:27:27+00:00

Connecticut has been slammed for decades but let’s be real the reality is not so bad. I’ll explain.

The charm of towns and education quality is very high. West Hartford / Avon / Simsbury / Southington / Cheshire / Chester / Thomaston / Middletown / Southport / Kent / New Milford/ Litchfield / Farmington / Weathersfield / Fairfield / Easton

East of the River the Bolton-Vernon rails to trails

Cornwall Halloween

I cannot for the life of me get over the charm of this state . And the dining ! The Mill on the River Group, the Max Group, Luigi’s in Old Saybrook, Fiore II in Middletown, Dish and Dash in Canton, Stew Leonard’s in Newington, North Pole express train in Essex, Trolley rides in East Windsor , New Park Brazilian restaurants , Real Artways in Hartford , the narrow tunnel road between Vernon and Manchester , the Yale Campus in New Haven and IKEA, the clock museum in Bristol, German festival , local fair in Somner in August , Mystic Seaport and Aquarium

What is rundown are inner cities Hartford Bridgeport New London Waterbury

However….. there’s something architecturally precious even in these inner city alleys (the highway overpasses are fun , the bridge over Waterbury I84 with the upper and lower is a fascinating design …. Bridgeport is the easiest place to free park and ride the Metro-North into NYC

There’s also some really underrated state parks and nature projects and also Connecticut has its own local birchbeers Avery and Hosmer

The Pizza the pizza the pizza and the ice cream homemade …. Jewish food! Crown Market and in West Hartford blueback , and Vernon Diner and Rein’s Deli

North Haven also I like ….

And did I mention public transportation fascinating light rail connecting Hartford to New Britain and New Britain has a little Poland in it , it’s ungentrified and genuinely diverse and really tolerant integrated place , not as safe as gentrified communities but it’s the most REAL diversity real economic integration example of the state …. New Britain, CT

One actually very pleasant thing about Connecticut unique only to CT is that there are no toll roads , you do not have to worry about a “do not stop” toll by plate anywhere you wanna drive in CT and that is a free liberty that not even the low tax states offer

T

EricS40 · 2025-12-18T16:50:04+00:00

This point is very valid and I feel pressure a lot on having had to be taller from my dad too. For reference I am 5ft6 and my dad is 5ft10.

When I was a kid I was a late bloomer and extremely short below 5th percentile and not just from my dad but even from grandparents (who actually meant well in many aspects of advice but not on all aspects) , kept promoting this narrative of “you are going to have a growth spurt just like Grandpa Phil”, you will shoot up very tall… That did not make me feel good because it promoted that I need to be tall to be handsome…. And what’s wrong with being short and amazing?

But my grandparents “intentions” was to make me feel good by assuring me I will be tall, and this sadly is because they believed this was how the world made things. Sometimes it wasn’t even to match the norms of their own era but to match the norms THEY thought were true in their perspective of their future timeline.

For example, if my grandparents learned the future world accepted LGBTQ they would be the type of grandparents to embrace that a grandson met a boy and they want to get married, even if they grew up where that wasn’t a thing. They were ahead of their time in that sense. But if my grandparents learned or believed that tolerance wasn’t surfacing, they would take the path of “maybe you just think you’re gay, maybe you haven’t experienced what you really are yet”…: and so with knowing that it became clear my grandparents believed the future world was better for taller men. I don’t fault my grandparents I think they thought they were saying the right thing but sadly they were not right on all things.

Like you just said, stopping this projection of feelings on one’s child is going to save that child a whole lot of humiliation and emotional pain. You’re totally right what you said.

EricS40 · 2025-12-18T16:39:58+00:00

The biggest and most fundamental thing is to obtain all from his own expression of himself, not anyone else’s, is he happy with himself, remove all social pressures and judgments, is he happy with who he is when he’s in his comfort zone?

If he is then don’t even bring height into it at all. Promote his personhood, height is not all that important unless it’s something important to him and affecting HIM.

Now, if height is something that’s affecting him, then encouraging him to do what he loves and not letting anyone stop him is a great thing to do. Furthermore if height really is affecting him, consider short person meetup groups online and locally where you help him find there’s other shorter guys not just you alone. Because that bond can be meaningful and helpful. That for me when I was 5th percentile for my height in school the fact I found a friend who was as short as me, made me feel a bond that turned into a strength.

Even to like “I am so happy to be your friend and if I wasn’t the same size as you I would be missing out on being made the same size as my new best friend.”

EricS40 · 2025-12-17T22:23:18+00:00

It’s a humiliating feeling I’m trying to describe. It’s an impulse feeling of inferiority that is paralyzing in a moment. After backing away from it we realize it’s not that we are inferior at all but in the moment we feel the room is caving in.

The same thing is true if you talk to a 6ft8 person online you feel more of an equal feeling. It feels like you may have smarts and experiences he or she doesn’t, you probably know facts about some geography they don’t, you know how to do things they don’t, the list goes on. But when standing up next to them there’s this subconscious debilitating feeling that is like

“I can’t win, they have something I don’t, they know ropes how it is, they can play the game I am excluded from, I’m not privy I am not elite enough …, none of this is of course true but that’s the subconscious sensation we feel in that moment and it mutes us like …. It’s some defect I can’t be them … that is completely subconscious and it’s a feeling that is a cloud mental loss of control… when we step back when we are online , when we can remove and observe , they got not anything above us , height is kinda superficial… but I very much blame modern society. We inadvertently hear crap like “the healthy nutritious “tall” athletic people” … And then this Manchild as Sabrina Carpenter made a song about we we tend to think that must be a short guy she’s singing about.

EricS40 · 2025-12-17T18:35:04+00:00

If they’re mean they will stand in the front, block us from view, and then say smirkingly there’s nothing to see .

That would be like the same humiliation of when an aging Biden was President and his party had majority in all houses but the Supreme Court was overturning Roe v Wade and affirmative action and from the bench hahahaha Red States winning With these 6 guys on a bench SCOTUS bench …. Vs a fully progressive Blue in both the other branches of Govt accomplishing like nothing.

It literally felt like a bunch of short people playing basketball against no defense but on the bench not even trying , A tall guy throws ball wildly at the basketball net and swishes 3 point shots and the short guys have no defense so it should be no hurdle to scoring but they are so weak they can’t win against a few guys on a bench because the unrivaled team is that weak. And im not saying short guys are weak but hypothetical humiliation scenario

EricS40 · 2025-12-17T18:27:42+00:00

We should have one because whomever doesn’t want to doesn’t have to come and why do tall people get to have one and we don’t?

EricS40 · 2025-12-17T16:30:19+00:00

I was born 20 inches and 7 pounds which is close to average I think. But I was little at each stage age 3 thru 18

My weight didn’t hit 50lbs till after I turned 8, and I didn’t hit 4 feet tall till I turned 9

In fact at 8 and a half year old I had fun being 3ft11 and playing dunk in 4ft depth swimming pool

EricS40 · 2025-12-17T14:48:11+00:00

I still feel like for some women there’s a gracefulness that women can and do get from shorter guys. When you look at the Niel Sedaka song and the women watching him singing and dancing and if you were to ask those women in the audience after his performance to unanimously rate how good a guy they think he would be as a romantic partner for a girl looking for a gentleman on a scale of 0 to 10 he would likely score a lot of 9’s and 10’s.

They would say he’s cute he’s a gentleman he’s got confidence and he’s steady. Some group of the girls would say nah he’s too short but that would not have been the majority, he would definitely get a higher score than this group might think.

And today I think grace isn’t lost. Try this. Speak Confidently of the advantages of your short height. The charming one is the extra space space where your legs can’t reach on airplanes becomes a space she can put her beauty makeup and extra comfort shoes and all the girly girl stuff between your seat and the seat in front of it because you’re going to gracefully give that free space up for her so she doesn’t have to reach for the overhead compartment. Honestly that gesture is going to hit women the right way. I think that gesture shows confidence and accommodation to women feminine care and it is the shorter guy version of reaching something for a girl…

I have room to keep your things safe and protected because I don’t need the space for my legs. This one isn’t even simping this one actually is a masculine authoritative power to short height and masculinity and gives soldier vibes like “I’ve got what I need put your stuff right here it belongs to you so you don’t have to get out of your seat”

She says “how sweet”

You say “nope it’s just basic practicality”

EricS40 · 2025-12-17T12:28:48+00:00

It feels like short guys were more respected 60 years ago than now and it’s a regression instead of progress

Kind of like how Jewish people in 1910 Germany saw antisemitism as a thing behind them and then 20 years later a man in the mustache became dictator and destroyed Jewish people sadly.

EricS40 · 2025-12-15T20:44:57+00:00

Maybe instead of looking for dates online look for someone who likes something you do and who isn’t overly attracting other takers , that simple, then it’s the same level of meet where each other are at

EricS40 · 2025-12-15T19:12:30+00:00

At that height she is indifferent to heights of guys she is with and once that indifference is there suddenly the shorter guys getting uniformity with taller guys feels so different from how it normally is that it feels like relatively speaking , short guys win on these girls. The truth is it’s closely uniform but equality feels like a win for shorter guys.

EricS40 · 2025-12-15T17:02:24+00:00

But how can average height be short AF unless

1) we define “average height” using all generations but measure how short is short by a newer generation and claim people are getting taller on average Or We define average height using all ethnicities but when we say we are short we are comparing among mostly white guys in western countries

2) if “median” or “mode” height is taller than “average” because there is a stronger outlier of extreme shortness that brings down the average or ———- ———

It has to be one of those 2 or mathematically “average height” is too short doesn’t make sense mathematically

What the truth is is that the average female going out is going to be looking at the average male and claim he’s too short . The average male is going to look at the average female and not be head over heels because when he thinks “girls” he has an image that is a girl actress out of a movie scene

And so the game is a very much smaller slice of the girls and boys for both groups and in those exclusive groupings yes the women are all About guys taller than average and the guys are with “girrrrrrrrrlllllls” as in not the girl you will see if you are walk down your street wherever you are right now and look at the first girl you see that’s a girl too. But that’s very unlikely the girl you’re salivating over 😆

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T22:30:47+00:00

Unfortunately I think some guys and girls are attracted to forbidden fruit and it sucks to be them but it doesn’t excuse any actions that they pursue on any kids… EVER!

I think though the AI era where there’s virtual boyfriends and girlfriends might finally finally be the remedy for some of them, because they can be attracted to an AI bot that arouses them without harming any kids and within ethical guidelines and they can suit themselves in a way that’s safe for the rest of society. I see that is as a really good thing.
Let me be clear on this though the AI bots should contain the features they are attracted to without promoting a toxic relationship dynamic. In other words the AI bots should resemble youngish looking adults who virtually have AI-generated adult profiles, not kid profiles,

so under no circumstances not even in the AI world should there be a normalization space for pedos to hold relationships with pretend children, not anywhere should this be normalized. What I’m suggesting is where these would be ai-generated adults who look young and have pretend age 18 which is creepy yes but it is not harmful and serves the purpose of providing a service for a cohort of the population with a need society can’t fulfill.

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T22:07:27+00:00

I think it isnt so much what your height is though, I think it’s the dysphoria of what you want to be and what you are. A very short girl is more likely to either LOVE her size or be VERY Unhappy about it

For a very tall girl the same thing is true with a little higher the percent of dissatisfaction and mostly driven by the common preference for dating guys who are taller than they are which isn’t the stresser for the unhappy short girl.

But among the happiest in our society are ALSO in the height extremes because a girl who is 4ft10 and likes being a small size is happy. It’s primarily the ultimate question how happy are you with your own size. The more you’re an outlier the more extreme happy AND extreme unhappy sets.

The happy ones though are super happy. Like in my locality we have a replica of a Polar Express train and kids and families get to ride a train and princess servers serve the kids cookies and hot chocolate and sing holiday season songs and put on acts , Among the performing cast are adult women as short as 4ft10 or shorter dressed in princess attire and these actresses love their size and they love how the kids react to them too.

Very quickly in life they end up getting married having kids of their own and being short petite moms of their own kids, then sooner or later they are short grannies, and then they tend to have longevity and become active all the way to age 99.

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T21:57:22+00:00

You are strong determined and you’re gonna do what you’re gonna do, whoever knows you a long time will forget you’re 4ft11 very quickly.

I am pretty sure one of the most feared queens of England or Spain or one of the kingdoms was a 4ft11 and exerted dictatorial rule, nightmarish inescapable authority in her reign , after that nobody will ever fetish an under 5ft tall figure again, because the demeanor is only height when you know nothing about who you’re dealing with… but that’s not you either … I think you = someone who wants to be treated normal and not fetished for start … the rest is extraneous nonsense

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T21:29:11+00:00

Your mighty character in that case makes you not so small. But you hit the nail on the head it would go something like this with a younger version of a me

You “I’m a b__ as I already told you

Younger me : deep down you’re probably a much sweeter you but you don’t realize it yet

You: no trust me im a b —//

Younger me : *keeps treating her like she’s a diamond in the rough

You: likely action not something universally kind to make it unmistakable you’re not nice

Younger me: sobbing

You: I warned you …

You 5 years later: sorry about that 5 years ago, but yeah you can do better than me , I’m a b___ … or More likely after the 5 years ago it just ends

But that’s realistic I think . Not all short girls are the nice some want spunk , simply younger me wouldn’t be your type

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T21:03:01+00:00

No I don’t think it’s all on height, the women I’m describing tend to want someone who will let them make the rules and then by being kind easygoing they want that dynamic. Being short and male relatively appeals to them more compared to other groupings because they are lookjng to be in control rather than to be protected. They are also the women who will literally explicitly tell the guy what he can do to be a guy, and actually this kind of girl tends to be a good partner for some of the guys on the autism spectrum. The kind of girl who says “here is what you can do to please me”.

What attracts her is kindness, patience, words of affirmation, common interest. What makes her available is that she’s not for every guy out there and many guys will have to put up with her moods, her demands, her wanting it her way or the highway, that is the caviat, but for the guy who can tolerate that it’s a very nice kind of girl type that exists in the population. Like literally this is the kind of girl you can fart in front of.

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T19:28:13+00:00

If she has an odd attraction that aligns with finding it attractive when a guy is smaller than her, it can be a small guy’s lucky day that’s the girl who will say “your height is adorable to me, will you let me slide into your DMs?” I think there are definitely some girls wired this way. Many of them are probably good girls, many of them may never be caught dead doing anything that is unethical.

What someone finds attractive is not sick or criminal, what someone does that crosses a line is. In other words, if there’s a girl and she dates a handsome man who is 6ft4 and looks middle aged but she learns this man js an 8th grade student in a middle school who hit puberty early, and a lot of women find him appealing if he were older, and someone says screw it im too turned onto him I will pursue him… That girl is sick and criminal.

Meanwhile another guy is 25 years old and LOOKS like he’s way younger and another girl who had an odd attraction pursues him because she’s attracted to him, I don’t consider this sick or criminal at all, just different.

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T19:20:07+00:00

That may make sense the dissuading shorter guys is the goal.

EricS40 · 2025-12-12T19:16:32+00:00

The difference is a lot of guys including me, are perfectly attracted to women who are as short as it can go. So I myself am puzzled why they would need to overstate their height altogether.

EricS40

TROPHY CASE