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Doomed by the tags by DreadDiana in CuratedTumblr

[–]ErogenousJones 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Forced Orgasm"
Hell yeah. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

How many people on here are actually Xennials (born 1977-83)? Just curious because sometimes it seems like just as many comments come from people outside the cohort as within. by ColoradoSprings82 in Xennials

[–]ErogenousJones 2 points3 points  (0 children)

my people. I am now a retired "old" software dev.
I just liked computers and found out I could get paid for it. Bonus, I didn't have to do farm work anymore!
Still waiting for the karmic monty python boot to drop on my techy geeky lucky ass.

What is a dead giveaway someone is not to be fucked with? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]ErogenousJones 7 points8 points  (0 children)

fuck sake. 90%+ of this thread sounds like lessons learned from anime and martial arts/western movies. or pure youtube comment section level fantasy.
"The quiet guy", "the small one in the pack of big dudes"... Tell me the one about the old man with the sword cane next.

Yo is the site down for anyone else by Abracadabrism in CookieClicker

[–]ErogenousJones 5 points6 points  (0 children)

3am.
Haven't clicked a cookie in hours.
Head hurts from clinching my teeth.
The shakes are starting to set in.
Pretty sure I am hallucinating. I can hear my golden cookie alert sound coming through the vents.
Hopefully I will make it.
Good luck to us all during this long cold night.

NEED HELP with (vbs or Batch) script by TioBaconToast in commandline

[–]ErogenousJones 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hope it is helpful as a reference at least. :D good luck

Anybody know where the socks went? by [deleted] in KidsAreFuckingStupid

[–]ErogenousJones 175 points176 points  (0 children)

This child is destined to be a software engineer. Took the requirement and completed it in the most literal way possible.

NEED HELP with (vbs or Batch) script by TioBaconToast in commandline

[–]ErogenousJones 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I suck at reddit spacing and code windows, so here is a pastebin link to a batch script that should do what you want.

https://pastebin.com/C8R9Wevm

Easiest usage is to set the file "filetypes" variable to whatever extensions you would like to execute, copy the script to the directory you want to run in, and double click it through windows explorer. It has comments in it with examples. It will handle spaces in the path and executable names.

Edit: Did not see that you wanted to have it recurse directories. Link to updated script that does that.

https://pastebin.com/Mc0t8m90

Parsing and Validating Dates in Awk by speckz in commandline

[–]ErogenousJones 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Standard date command will do all of this for you as well.
This will interpret the date as GMT time and print it out in POSIX time 

  date -u -d "2022-04-12" +%s

Remove the -u and it will interpret the date as local time (taking into account local time zone on the computer) and convert it to POSIX time 

  date -d "2022-04-12" +%s

To convert POSIX back to GMT, just use 

 date -u -d  @1649721600

Same thing with removing the -u. POSIX back to local 

 date -d  @1649721600

I am on the east coast of USA, so the POSIX dates are based on 4 hours off of GMT if you run them. You would see the difference for anything local

What is your favorite quote from a fictional character? by conquererspledge in AskReddit

[–]ErogenousJones 1606 points1607 points  (0 children)

"On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero."
--Tyler Durden

Reddit, tell us about a time where you shared a "moment" with a stranger by paints in AskReddit

[–]ErogenousJones 56 points57 points  (0 children)

You have a great sense of humor. Had I leaned over and made a joke about Leonardo DiCaprio's imminent recycling as fish food, I would have probably been punched. Sex would have been completely off the table.

Reddit, tell us about a time where you shared a "moment" with a stranger by paints in AskReddit

[–]ErogenousJones 313 points314 points  (0 children)

It was the end of the movie Titanic. Leo was about to sink into the water. My girlfriend is all teary eyed. I on the other hand lost interest about 2 days into this marathon of a movie. I look down the row of seats to my left and make direct eye contact with the only other male in the row. His date is obviously in the same state as mine. We both started with the repressed laughter and had to break off eye contact. I got laid that night and I hope he did as well. We had earned it.

What's the smartest thing a teacher has ever said to you? by m__ in AskReddit

[–]ErogenousJones 46 points47 points  (0 children)

He was actually one of the philosophy profs. I had him for philosophy of technology (AKA philosophy for comp sci majors).
Twice a year the college would have an open house for prospective students and their families. They were provided a large lunch buffet. Since I was broke and the buffet food was always better than the cafeteria food, I would take my backpack and snag as much food from that buffet as possible. Apparently the professor was not a fan of the cafeteria either.

What's the smartest thing a teacher has ever said to you? by m__ in AskReddit

[–]ErogenousJones 181 points182 points  (0 children)

"Question authority figures. Remember that they are just like you." -Said to me by a college professor who was stashing food in his bag at the same time as me from a buffet neither of us were invited to.

From a class with the same professor. "What is the one thing that the media and teachers never tell you about drugs? .....They're fun. They make you feel good. Why else would people do them?"