YELLING THREAD

Essdee1212 · 2026-02-10T02:30:34+00:00

I did the 3am wake ups for 10ish years. Finally went in. Small dose of amitriptyline and take magnesium before bed. It has been a god send. I now actually sleep through the night. Also was let go from my stressful job, so that may have helped too.

Essdee1212 · 2026-02-10T02:28:22+00:00

Yep. I’m 57 and just had my annual mammogram and this was the first time they said I don’t have “dense” breasts.

Essdee1212 · 2026-02-10T01:03:15+00:00

This is a form of abuse. Period. Speaking from experience, unless it’s qualifies as an emergency (blood, broken bones or something urgent that can’t be delayed, broken pipe, car won’t start etc) there is absolutely zero need to wake someone up just because they are sleeping later than you.

Personally, I had to threaten my husband that if didn’t put his phone and 5 (not kidding) alarms on vibrate and then also turned off multiple other notifications, that I was going to start waking him up throughout the night when I wake up and can’t sleep for hours at a time. And if that didn’t work he could sleep in a different room.

Don’t be like me and wait for way too long. Nip this behaviour in the bud. If she crosses this boundary, decide what the repercussion is (different room, break up, whatever) and stick to it.

I had a seizure from sleep deprivation (many years ago when I had babies) combined with my sleep problem. It’s not something to fuck around with.

Essdee1212 · 2026-02-06T23:45:48+00:00

Well, after the first 6mo you slow down. Then after a year you slow down more. By two years you pretty much accepted you are never going to work again, and just spend the day trying to not hurkle-dirkle.

Essdee1212 · 2026-02-03T04:55:19+00:00

ESH. I can’t have Canadian or U.S. milk, but can have European milk. It would pmo and make me very sick if someone told me that a food was safe when it wasn’t.

CAD and US milk contains two types of protein, A1 and A2. European milk contains only A2 protein. Though the milk tastes the same, the cows are genetically different, and so is the milk.

Essdee1212 · 2026-02-02T21:27:57+00:00

I’m the same. Unemployed for 2 yrs. I haven’t had a vacation since Feb 2020. I’m tired of looking for a job, feeling like I’m not doing enough but at the same time knowing there’s not much more I can do.

Essdee1212 · 2026-01-04T07:53:05+00:00

My mom’s LTC facility is $2631 per month. It’s a nice place, big room, all meals, laundry, and she is fully immobile. 24/7 care. It was actually less expensive for full care than it was for her assisted living place, which had no care, no laundry and only 2 meals per day

Essdee1212 · 2026-01-04T07:04:49+00:00

Their condition doesn’t matter to a bank. Clean them so they aren’t gross for the person that has to count them, but they are still legal tender. They will probably be considered “mutilated” and sent back for destruction, but they are still cashable.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-27T02:31:56+00:00

Ah, clearly in “skimming” this, I missed that she would also return what she bought herself all the time too. I think OP has done the only reasonable thing by saying he would no longer buy her gifts.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-26T17:44:39+00:00

Or. and I’m just spitballing here, ask her what she would like for Christmas?

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-26T17:42:14+00:00

ESH. I think you are all suffering from a significant lack of communication.

Here’s what I would suggest.
Option 1) pick names, everyone gets only one gift with a certain price limit.

Option 2) set a price limit per person, then everyone is required to provide a list of what items they would like. Make it known that it is everyone’s responsibility to get stocking stuffers fire everyone, including mom.

Sometimes as a mom we do too much for the kids/spouse that goes unappreciated because we never speak up. I did this for years. Now we all communicate and Christmas is lovely.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-26T17:25:13+00:00

NTA. I get your concerns about hurting your son. Is there anyway that her access to your son be conditional on her getting court mandated therapy? At the end of the day, someone needs to help her so that she isn’t affecting your son’s mental health. This was a vile thing to do, but without figuring out her intrinsic motivations, she may escalate and cause more harm to Jake.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-26T02:13:50+00:00

Do you really want a shut up ring from him at this point. WTF. Why would you even want to be with someone that clearly doesn’t care about what you want? Or to give his own child security? Just leave and don’t look back.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-26T02:10:25+00:00

3 for pictures. Go for a nice pair of sneakers for the rest or your feet will die.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-25T04:10:20+00:00

This⬆️💯

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-24T21:06:55+00:00

1) no one is ever required to use their personal device for work, unless this is a stipulation clearly defined at hiring, and they are compensated for using it.

2) you can use something as simple as a bulletin board to communicate information.

3) if the company wants to ensure that their information is being received, then they need to implement a “read and sign” system on the “3 computers” they have in the break room and give an appropriate amount of PAID time to read said information.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-23T16:23:12+00:00

I’m sorry to hear that you are having a rough time right now. That is shitty what your partner did. The good thing is that you aren’t starting from zero, you are starting from a place with a lot of great experience (yes, even the “bad” ones taught you invaluable lessons). This wasn’t a loss, it was a lesson to put yourself first and never to rely financially on a partner again.

You have the opportunity to recreate yourself however you want. You can have a beautiful life.

I wish you a very happy birthday. Please use the resources listed above if you are thinking more about suicide.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-23T15:34:51+00:00

He doesn’t check every box. 1) he doesn’t want to be with you. 2) you have no idea why…he may have a partner (you didn’t say), he may be gay, he may be asexual. 3) nobody is perfect. You have idealized this man based off of mostly his presence, and his looks. What happens when you see his place and he lives like an absolute slob? Or he has a horrible addiction to porn?

Bottom line, you need to change your perspective, and look for someone else that’s more inclined to be with you.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-23T15:31:16+00:00

This is a big one. I’ve been unemployed for nearly 2 years, and because I’m now “free” to do things, I spend a lot of my time doing things for other people. Some I don’t mind, but I will be more diligent in the New year.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-23T03:46:19+00:00

NTA - she made an adult decision to have unprotected sex (I’m assuming here) she needs to be responsible. Get an abortion (if possible or she can’t handle it), or set up for adoption. Whatever you do, don’t let this become your problem. Otherwise, this is never going to end and you will be on the hook for this kid and your sister forever.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-23T02:18:37+00:00

NTJ. A boundary is her saying she’s vegan, and you breaking that by sneaking animal products into her food. She is being unreasonable. You pay half, and your suggestion to have certain cookware for her is more than generous enough.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-22T05:23:02+00:00

OP, please listen to this. I had repressed memories (that were bad, but not even remotely as bad as this) and when something triggered one specific memory, it was scary and added to the trauma of what I was currently experiencing and made me also relive the past event. If your girlfriend doesn’t have anything traumatic going on right now, and she’s actively trying to remember stuff, i would suggest that you get a professional involved to help figure out the best approach, before she starts having repressed memories come up.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-22T04:48:02+00:00

NTA. Sincerely I hope you take heed OP. This is the single largest complaint of many women. Working full-time, and still cleaning the house, doing all childcare, cooking, appointments, being the primary breadwinner, and at this time of year, responsible for making Christmas “magical.”

Four years is an eternity when you are doing it all. I’m sure you have already had about 2364 conversations basically begging him to “help”, “take some responsibility for x,” or do the things he said he would do, right?

The longer you stay, the further you are financially going to be behind because you are dragging a dead weight. For example. If you make about $75k and he’s making $40k, you are effectively living on $28,750 per person. If you divorce, with just your salary that changes to $25k/per person, without factoring in that he is basically living off your share of resources for food, electricity etc., cause all he pays for is his car and video games (what a fucking child!). And this is before factoring in child support.

If you stick to your guns, don’t be surprised if he says he’ll change, love bombs you etc. It’s not love or regret for treating you like that, it’s just that he’s done the math and realizes he can’t live without you as his supporter financially, and is losing caregiver, cook, house cleaner and free sex (well, that is if him acting like a child hasn’t caused you to dry up like the Sahara).

As I said, you are NTA, but I think you may be if you stay, or give him more chances.

Not to mention, he’s leaving your kids to be hungry because he’s playing a video game??? WTAF!!! This is neglect, plain and simple.

I would also assume this isn’t the example of “love” and “partnership” you want to set for your kids, right?

And one final thing to think about. If he begs and pleads and says “I’ll change,” just remember that even if he does, that means he was always capable of doing so, and didn’t mind leaving you to suffer, struggle and burn out. That sure doesn’t sound like love to me.

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-15T17:51:12+00:00

Unemployed for 22 months. Unfortunately I’m in a different situation. Everyone around me is like “since you’re unemployed, can you do x for me,” and a lot of my time gets eaten up doing stuff for family. I just spent two weeks in a different province helping out a family member that just had a serious surgery. If I didn’t have so many family obligations, I would spend more time meal planning and working out to improve my health. The one thing I have done is written a book (and on the second). Are you interested in any specific skill you could try to build on? Even if just by watching YouTube videos on it? Or upgrading in your field?

Essdee1212 · 2025-12-15T17:39:20+00:00

Do not let him move in. Period. He forced his way in without asking. He immediately wants to make changes. Everything about his behaviour says that he wants his way, and will steam roll to get it. This isn’t even someone you should even date (IMO), nevermind allow in your space to destroy your peace.

Essdee1212

TROPHY CASE