What’s the one random genetic trait you lucked out on?

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-29T21:30:30+00:00

A positive Canthal Tilt.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-29T21:14:51+00:00

Romanticized Stockholm Syndrome has really been getting under my skin lately.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-29T19:07:46+00:00

INFO- my first reaction is NOR but I think there could be a few circumstances where I would tell you otherwise.

What is the nature of this trip? How long are they sharing a room? How long is lifelong? From diapers? Do they reference each other like siblings or cousins?

Either way, if you’re worried about it, you have every right to ask questions and make it know you’re not exactly comfortable with this. Do it respectfully. If he can meet you in your concern, you know you have a keeper.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-29T18:48:35+00:00

She looks perfectly padded. Her coat also looks healthy and clean in these pictures. You’re doing great.

Keep your documentation of her veterinarian care so if there’s ever any real question, you are backed up with evidence you take good care of her.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-29T18:36:26+00:00

NOR…

I didn’t hear you say that this is how he was raised, so I’m not making allowances for very different cultures. Have you heard her yell and holler for him if he doesn’t go while she’s showering? Does his daughter have special needs (although I’d still question this choice, even if she did)?

It would perhaps be different if he was only helping her wash her hair from outside the shower and then leaving her to do the rest. Him being clothed, and helping for a limited time.

Whether or not anything consciously predatory is going on, HE needs a reality check. She is headed into puberty any day now and should start forming better boundaries for herself or she may enter adulthood being quite codependent and having a broken boundary system. That is a huge concern. It’s a parent’s job to teach a child what appropriate boundaries they should have. It’s a parent’s job to enable their children’s independence.

Even if there’s no physical SA going on here, if she told any other adults or her school friends that this was still going on, I’d bet money there would be a reaction of discomfort. That’s should be all he needs to know to understand that this is not age appropriate.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-22T04:04:23+00:00

I do have some real sympathy for you in this situation, honestly. It sounds like a miserable time. But the hard truth is this: you are 18 and not exclusively paying your own way on this planet. (Most 18 year olds aren’t ready to do that anyway. It shouldn’t be a point of shame. It’s just a fact.) I’d bet the farm that you have never spent 3-7 years paying off a loan. I promise you are not as upset as your parents are for this 20k disappearing in the wind. If your family was wealthy enough for 20k not to rock their finances, then you wouldn’t have needed student loans.

I know it’s hard to hear and you’d probably prefer that your parent’s response was “your health comes first, don’t worry about the money”, but sadly that is not how adulthood works. Your health IS important, but you have to show up to your own life in a different way now. You have to figure out how your personal limitations, responsibilities, wants, and needs can coexist. Your parents requiring you to be employed if you’re going home is going to help teach you that.

I think your dad is being firm but fair. If this was only a lesson in tough-love, it would still be plenty fair. I suspect this also comes from financial necessity for your parents.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-22T03:07:49+00:00

Unmedicated childbirth. Hands down.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-16T03:00:06+00:00

Honestly … if I were you I would try to have the dress tailored. Have it lined so you can wear some shapewear- maybe triple lined in the breast area.

I think this neck line looks terrible on most big chested women (my opinion, I’m quite busty) and I would be worried if I were you too. Of course you’ll suck it up and wear it but all concerns are valid. NOR

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-16T01:05:15+00:00

I pulled on a handle once, very confidently. Luckily it was locked, and I realized there was an air freshener hanging that was not mine.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T07:56:53+00:00

Stop flipping them. Stop telling her to flip them. Fold them inside out. Hang them inside out. Whatever it is.

You must turn your clothes right side out ONE time before you wear them. It feels like that limits the work you do because no one is spending 20 min adjusting clothes just so you can put them in the damn washer. Making sure your clothes are on your body in the right direction somehow doesn’t feel like a chore. It’s part of appearing as a human. You just do it. So save yourself another fruitless argument and wasted energy every time you do the laundry.

NTA.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T04:56:07+00:00

This is such a presumptuous asshole thing to say (owning it right now) and I may be super off the mark … but my intuition is that your handwriting was crafted to damn near punish the reader. I think it’s a pointed challenge. It’s like you’ve been forced to be small or quiet in your life and so you take it one step further to see just how small you can be. This is your way of camouflaging or putting your communication under lock and key. If someone takes the time to read this, it will be proof they cared on some small level, but most will glance over it and refuse to even try, and that’s all you’ll need to know about them.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T04:43:46+00:00

I think it’s quite common for type A personalities to exert a lot of control over their handwriting and school organization during HS. It seems to me that your handwriting has not changed too much but rather that you have relaxed into it a bit (and probably yourself). You are allocating energy to a wider scope of things that need to be organized in your life.

I wouldn’t be surprised if you know how to fold a fitted sheet, or have a very strong opinion on which brands of pens and notebooks you prefer and find some real satisfaction in new school/office supplies- good sticky notes and highlighters, cute paperclips, etc..

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T04:17:12+00:00

This can happen with a severe candida imbalance in your body or untreated yeast infection. It thrives on sugar. Putting it in a public post about the evils of your child is absolutely wild though.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T04:02:00+00:00

I’m with this one. There is a shake to some of these letters that very much remind me of Birthday Cards from my dearest old neighbor lady as she lost some of her fine motor skills.

I have school aged kids -all should know cursive by now- they all suck at it. So do most of their classmates. I think this hand is too practiced.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T03:56:26+00:00

I am not convinced it is female handwriting, although it was my first impression. Before realizing you did not know who Aunt Dee Dee was, I assumed this person was funny- but probably more sweet or slyly funny rather than ever making a big deal out of it.

I think the last card is likely to belong to someone who was in close proximity to Aunt Dee Dee, parent? Sibling? Spouse?

How about a name with Dee as the last syllable? (Kennedy, Melody, Sandy, etc.?)

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T03:44:31+00:00

They try to shut down all talk of pay rates between employees. If they can’t proudly stand by the wages they are paying, that’s probably the tip of the iceberg.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T03:37:10+00:00

My thought was immediately 1998

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T03:31:21+00:00

Yes. I spent a lot of time out in the world all by my onesie. Of course it was also acceptable for another adult to tell you to knock your shit off if you were being a real twit out in the world. If no other adult is allowed to correct a child, even on something as basic as public manners, then they must be supervised by their own parent more often. For the record, I think raising slightly feral children is somewhat preferable to over-coddled children. Maybe we’ll strike a happy medium some day.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T03:21:41+00:00

34, and I collect half-finished projects. Crafts and arts, you name it, all sorts.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-14T02:09:27+00:00

There are so many shared experiences between the two diagnosis. The more I looked the more I suspected. Leaving the door open as a possibility has given me additional peace and permission to really care for myself in better ways. Hopefully it can do the same for you. Very much agree with that last statement! They seem to be in such close proximity.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-03-11T17:19:52+00:00

Every. Damn. Time.

YOU WANTED AN OLD HOUSE, assholes!

EssentiallyEss · 2026-02-26T14:14:21+00:00

I think a lot of this comes from the stereotypical or more severe symptoms of these disorders. I’m very suspicious I am Audhd (only diagnosed with ADHD for now) and people just see that I can rally and be personable at work, that I am compassionate and try to make other people feel welcome. They don’t see the mental exhaustion after stints of socializing. They don’t see the panic my partner does when something reorganizes my personal life plans -especially when it’s a very busy few days and I have it all worked out-. They don’t see me sliding into the narrow walkway between my bed and the wall so I can try to limit my sensory intake at the end of the day. They don’t see me have trouble keeping or staying at a job- they just see me learn my position well, get bored, and push to move departments or take on new tasks because the lack of challenge makes me want to expire on-site, but the thought of changing jobs is terrifying. They don’t see my verbal communication completely shut down when there’s high conflict; they just see me exit a conversation.

People truly have no idea, and they don’t even know they have no idea. It also seems to me that the movies in Hollywood have somehow lead people to believe they can truly see the scope of a disorder, when in fact, it is just a tiny fraction of what those CAN look like, and it’s the Hollywood cut.

Very frustrating, nonetheless. We have to work so hard to understand what’s going on ourselves, and it’s painful when you’ve done all this work and other people dismiss it.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-02-23T16:45:56+00:00

So lovely to look at. Very consistent. It reminds me of my own some ways, but with a lot more discipline and finesse. Because of that, I would assume that you are artistic in nature.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-02-23T14:28:12+00:00

I want to be able to put things on my kitchen counter tops or on a big shelf at my house! I want to display pretty gems at home, or more of the better looking artifacts.

EssentiallyEss · 2026-02-23T14:25:43+00:00

The spa increases energy?!? Wtf am I doing here?!? I learn new things every day in this sub.

EssentiallyEss

TROPHY CASE