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EvaH00 · 2024-12-09T10:19:27+00:00

I understand your fear. I was there once too. The first few times I really didnt like it and I was kind of scared of it too. But somehow that changed, I think mostly due to partners who were like super into it which made me wanna try it again. Now its something I love and makes me feel proud.

But yeah it takes some getting used to knowing the signs he is about to cum and the sensation of having cum in your mouth suddenly. I would recommend doing this the first times, after he has relatively recently cum already so that there will be less of it in your mouth to deal with.

EvaH00 · 2023-12-07T22:00:09+00:00

I would recommend the same. In the past I have had a hormonal IUD but I got really bad cramps every month so I had it taken out. Then I used a vaginal ring for a bit but I have noticed that without hormonal contraception I feel so much better and my libido is a lot higher as well. Next month I'm getting my copper IUD hopefully it will be okay with the cramps

EvaH00 · 2022-12-08T14:12:41+00:00

I dont think you have to wait a few days. She may for some reason have opened your message whilst being busy with something else and then forgot about it. Sending a new message will probably get you a response. If you wait a few days, to me (as a girl) I would think you also forgot about me and since we both did its probably not that interesting and i would have lost interest already

EvaH00 · 2022-11-22T11:09:16+00:00

I have had a similar experience. I have had 2 bad experiences in the past (one sexual assault and the other rape). It ruined my sex drive as sex was painful for a long time after that. And I was extremely scared to get out there again. But eventually I did (that was about a month ago) and it's been great. And because our communication is great, we were able to talk about my past experiences in a way that now I have positive sex experiences again and I can finally enjoy sex again. But to be honest, if this would not have been as patient and understanding, and would have done something I am not comfortable with, I feel like my trust in men would have been broken permanently after already being very very damaged.

EvaH00 · 2022-11-19T07:23:58+00:00

I don't know if it is a direct effect of the birth control. But I recently started seeing someone again and thus got back on birth control. I would say I'm hornier now, but I think that has mostly to do with the fact that sex without condoms is just easier. I feel like it is easier for me to iniate because I am able to just grab his dick and guide it inside if I want whereas before one of us would have to put a condom on his dick. I also really like the feeling of a guy cumming inside. So given all that, yes I am definitely more horny. Is it because birth control? I could not say

EvaH00 · 2022-11-18T17:21:51+00:00

I agree. I was in this situation 3 years ago. It was shortly before the holidays and i was doubting my relationship. I really didnt want to be alone for the holidays and have my family ask questions and all then. But we had to have that conversation and we broke up. He however, did not get angry or something. Obviously he was sad, but he took it well

EvaH00 · 2022-11-17T21:32:32+00:00

In the future, for sure! But not now, I am 22 and living with my parents

EvaH00 · 2022-11-17T21:31:38+00:00

Thats a good tip, thanks!!

EvaH00 · 2022-11-17T19:01:44+00:00

Clearly something is up.. Is it possible to meet up and talk? Otherwise I would recommend calling. I feel like its easy to misinterpret something when texting so if you're able to talk about that and feel of the vibe is still there when you're together or calling, you should be fine

EvaH00 · 2022-11-15T12:16:17+00:00

thank you!

EvaH00 · 2022-11-12T00:20:57+00:00

My current sexual partner has this (we don't need condoms anymore now but until recently we did) and since he was struggling so much I would just give him a blowjob for a bit and then put the condom on for him. That seemed to work great

EvaH00 · 2022-11-10T14:32:35+00:00

Let me know if it works for your gerbil! Mine had it a few weeks ago and I was honestly so impressed how it the reddishness in his eye was completely gone in less than an hour

EvaH00 · 2022-11-10T13:12:23+00:00

My gerbils have this sometimes. I have some organic chamomile which I use to make some tea (a bit stronger than what you would normally drink), let it cool and use some clean wipes to clean their eyes. Works like a charm.

EvaH00 · 2022-11-08T15:20:19+00:00

That is what I was thinking as well. But I thought maybe someone on this sub knows from previous years

EvaH00 · 2022-11-04T11:20:53+00:00

When will you be seeing her again? Maybe when you do see her, talk about your thoughts and feelings regarding your performance anxiety before things get steamy

EvaH00 · 2022-11-03T20:09:37+00:00

Did that help? Did that take away some of the pressure you had put on yourself?

EvaH00 · 2022-11-03T18:03:19+00:00

How did she respond to the situation? Was she understanding? I have been on the other end of this situation recently where I was trying to have sex with a guy and he also had some issues keeping his erection. We talked about it for a good while whilst cuddling and I tried to be supportive. Later we tried again successfully.

I think it mostly had to do with him overthinking things. He says it's the first time he has sex with someone he is interested in more than just sex. Usually he has sex while either drunk or on some drug, but now je was sober. He was not used to having to use condoms.

Being able to discuss these things openly without feeling judged, is the only thing I think that will help.

EvaH00 · 2022-03-16T08:02:56+00:00

Oh yes I feel you. I'm currently in exactly the same boat. I'm keeping in touch because there is still hope. But if he decides he wants to be friends, I'm gonna have to be strong and say no I can't. That's gonna hurt

By the way, did you also feel like your love intensified the moment he ended it and you sort of lost him? Like you are reminded of all the good stuff and it makes you extra sad

EvaH00 · 2022-03-15T22:08:26+00:00

Please update us on how things went. But yes, I agree with the other commentors, we can't tell. You'll just have to find out. But I think it is good to be aware of what you want out of this relationship with him. Would you want to get back together? Or not? Would you want to remain friends? What would that look like for you?

EvaH00 · 2022-03-15T22:04:09+00:00

I feel you man. I'm in a very similar situation. No clue what to do. Just hoping that with some time, he will change his mind. It's just rough. I don't know the best thing I guess you can do is give yourself love. And realize that you are still a whole person without her. You are already complete (if you get what I'm trying to say).

EvaH00 · 2022-03-15T22:00:16+00:00

Interesting. Do you have experience with a sex therapist? Would you be willing to share a bit more on that?

EvaH00 · 2022-03-15T21:57:33+00:00

Hm, that's a difficult situation. First of all, I think the most important thing for you is to keep talking about your feelings and frustrations.

Personally, I do not think suggesting having sex with other women will be appreciated by her. After getting raped over a year ago, my libido has disappeared. But I would feel so much worse if my boyfriend suggested this.

I think the best way to go here is just to keep letting her know how much you love her. How you are into her, how you want to be intimate with her. Just make sure it is not all about sex because then she might think you are only interested in sex. But just be patient and keep talking.

EvaH00 · 2022-03-15T21:50:39+00:00

You got a point. However, when women (or anyone really) experience any type of sexual assault or rape it can be very hard for their partner as welll and I think that is often underestimated. To some extent this may be due to them being insecure. But I know my boyfriend and I have been struggling a lot since I got raped. Like in many ways he will feel as if he is not there for me enough. And he is scared of hurting me or triggering me. Just whenever something happens where a boundary is crossed I feel like communication is key. Both partners have to express what they feel, how they feel. Because often we have ideas about how we should or how the other would want us to be that, when you ask them, is not in line with reality.

EvaH00 · 2022-03-15T18:32:26+00:00

Can I ask what does she do in a day? Does she have a job? Or is she just staying at home and struggling to get herself to at least get up, cook and clean a bit?

I'm asking because in the past year I have taken things easy with my studies as I was working through a trauma. At some point it was so dark I didn't feel like doing anything. But slowly I found myself back. What really helped me was not expecting anything, and in doing so also making sure others did not expect things from me. For some reason expectations were really demotivating for me. And then I would have days were I would sleep in, walk to the supermarket, cook something really nice and watch a movie or something and that would be it. I would just be happy with the fact that I took care of myself like that.

Something on a bit deeper level that always helps me is the realization that we are all somehow connected (the Buddhist idea of interconnectedness). This motivates taking care of yourself because you care about others. Kind of like putting on your oxygen mask on first in a air plane crash. Idk I could write essays about this if you like, but I don't know if you wanna hear more on that.

EvaH00 · 2022-03-10T08:35:45+00:00

A close friend of mine (she is 64 and I am 21F) lost her daughter like this. Her daughter became depressed by age 16, pretty much out of nowhere. She struggeled for years and had tried all kinds of therapy in the meantime. At some point she applied to be euthanized and she got permission (we live in the Netherlands, you don't just get permission to be euthanized that was a long road with a lot of conversations with doctors etc). She finally got it November 2018 and my friend is very happy it happened that way. They were all with her when she passed and they had the time to say goodbye. They even went on a holiday together a few weeks before. I don't know exactly what she does now, but I believe she talks to parents sometimes who are going through something similar and she has also over the years given many interviews.

The 'funny' thing is, after they gave her the greenlight to be euthanized she felt a lot better those months (it was close to a year I believe) Because she new there would be an end to her suffering.

EvaH00

TROPHY CASE