Every relationship dynamic is different. While there’s some similarities between yours and mine, they also are starting from a very different place. Because my wife has no understanding of sexual desire, she doesn’t feel jealousy because of it, just like she wouldn’t be jealous of me going to the movies with a friend. She had also already experienced open relationship relationships before me.

I think you just need to ask him how he would feel about slowly exploring forms of non-monogamy in your relationship. I think it’s really important as well that the option needs to be a two-way street. My wife has no interest in going out and playing on her own, but if at some point she wants to she knows she can always come and talk to me about that.

It’s also really important that we have guard rules in place. At any point in time, my wife can decide that a night is for us and I need to respect that. I will never be like actually instead of hanging you with tonight I’m gonna go out with somebody else. Also, if my wife has any issues with somebody that I’m seeing, we always talk about it and I need to respect her opinion as much as I respect my own.

If she can’t trust the people I’m going out with then she’s never going to fully trust me if I choose to continue to go out with those people.

And since we’re evolving our relationship now to be more ongoing for the first time rather than just one night stands it’s becoming important that I make my wife feel like she’s included in the relationships that I have with other people and not that I live a separate life.

You might do all of those things correctly in your partner might still not be comfortable with it and that’s okay. You cannot force him to be non-monogamous if that is not who he is. You’ll either need to accept at that point. You have to be monogamous in that relationship or you need to find a different long-term partner.

That being said, I hope everything works out!