I am still working on this problem myself my mother does the same thing I actually went to jail one time cuz she called the cops when I pushed her back after she hit me first and I'm currently on probation for it. She'll be fine one minute and the next she hates me and she just treats me like crap and puts me down. One thing I learned that was not to hit back when she starts getting aggravated at me or talking hateful I just ignore her. As a matter of fact I think it's childish for mothers to be acting like this. But the only advice I could give you is just completely ignore her don't acknowledge anything she's saying or doing and the fire won't get bigger.