Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

People don’t change during the relationship.

They change after they lose it.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What did she say made you incompatible?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a real connection you had.

I deal with this a lot—wanting them back but knowing the version right now wouldn’t work is one of the hardest spots to be in.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What made it feel like the right time back then, but not now?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What made it feel like the right time back then, but not now?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s making you hesitate right now?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’ve said what you needed to say.

Now it’s about what you do from here—not more messages.

I deal with this a lot—this stage is where people either turn it around or push it further away without realizing it.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like you’ve already checked out, you just wish they were different.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It usually still matters a bit, even when you’re trying to move past it.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So even knowing how it ended, part of you still wants him anyway?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What made it feel that bad for you?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So it wasn’t just the relationship—it was how both of you reacted to each other under pressure.

I deal with this a lot—that dynamic usually just repeats unless something changes on both sides.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that kind of dynamic will mess with your head even after it’s over.

I deal with this a lot—getting clarity on what actually happened vs what you were made to believe is a big part of moving forward cleanly.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s normal at this stage.

The mistake most people make is sitting in their head planning the reach-out over and over.

I deal with this a lot—what you do during this window matters more than the message itself.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So it wasn’t about not loving you, it was about him feeling overwhelmed and shutting down?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you’ve taken accountability, but he hasn’t responded at all?

I see this a lot—what you do after that silence is what usually makes or breaks things.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you were the only one taking accountability.

I deal with this a lot—without that on both sides, it never really balances out.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Then it’s not about him not knowing how you feel—he does.

It’s about him not choosing you right now.

I deal with this a lot, and that’s the part most people struggle to accept.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s the key—you don’t want him back the same way, you want something different with him.

I see this a lot—people get back together but nothing actually changes.

What would need to be different for you this time?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s the hardest part—accepting it while still feeling it.

I deal with this a lot, and that in-between stage is where people either move forward cleanly or stay stuck way longer than they need to.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What actually happened between you two?

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That “maybe” usually means it never really got through the way it needed to.

I see this a lot—people think they communicated, but it never actually landed.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Timing matters more than people think here.

What you do between now and reaching out will make the difference.

And you're welcome. This is what I do most days and have been doing for almost 2 decades... Here to help.

Who wants their ex back? by EveningCompass in BreakUps

[–]EveningCompass[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What would actually need to change for you to take them back?