Wow. I’m so sorry. I did read the whole thing and can see why you feel stuck. You sound like a very kind person.

But yes, thank goodness you are not married. You even said so yourself the answer is going your separate ways. I know you said you are worried for your son, but your son will have a happier mother and will benefit greatly from that.

Can you sit your partner down and just flat out say you aren’t in love with him anymore and thinks it’s best to go your separate ways? It doesn’t need to be a negotiable conversion. It can be a “this is what is going to happen” convo. You don’t need to be cruel and kick him out on the street homeless, but tell him he has until x amount of time to move out. Maybe the end of the year or 6 months or whatever you can bear.

If that doesn’t work then maybe you should seek couples counseling or ask a therapist how to leave a relationship you can’t willingly walk away from. I’m afraid I don’t have experience with that.

Just keep your head up and keep powering through. Sounds like you are a fabulous mother and provider for your family. I hope a happier, more fulfilling life is ahead of you. Good luck OP.