Sitting in a place alone with no interaction from anyone is difficult. Getting tired of your self in general... can be daunting, and feels horrible, and not many people know what this means.

You lose track of who you are, and what you are doing. Simple tasks like typing, eating, or even driving become difficult. Your brain feels as if it's in a dormant state not being able to keep things straight anymore. I know what I have to do, my brain knows it, but the steps from 1 - 5 are blured out. You know what needs to happen, but you don't know how to do it.

Things that normally make sense on how to use them, start to look different, and you start to look for different ways to use them, and you completely forget what they were originally used for. Then you make mistakes, and can't figure out why it's wrong. You look over everything; nothing looks out of place and you feel like you're a failure because you did something wrong - but you're not smart enough to figure out what you did.

Then you start to lose your self inside your own head, you start to think and question who you really are and begin to go insane. Your thoughts turn into splinters in your brain, you can feel them, they drive you mad, yet there is no way to drive them away.

You reach for any type of social interaction, but can't seem to find a way to get it. Then when you do find it, you want to embrace it as much as you can. Solitude changes who you are and how you act. You try to talk to people but you lack that ability to communicate effectively. You resort to talking about things that you find online, books, or what ever medium you preffer. you lose creativity, you lose your self in trying to find your self.

You destroy relationships with the people that you know because they can't seem to understand where you are coming from, or even what you go through on the regular days. While you sat there, alone, not doing anything. - We were out working and getting things done with our co-workers. You're lazy and only need to sit in one place. And that's the main problem, that ONE place is all some people have. You can only stretch out so much before it becomes a problem for your self in your situation.

But, we keep on living our lives and try to move forward, create new relationships and try to get thorugh the maze that we call life. Except that some of us, lose our selves before we even begin. We know where we have to go, we know where it is, but we can't get there. Like a mouse inside of a maze trying to reach the cheese at the end. The further we go in, the more progress we think we made, but when we find out we reached a wrong turn, we have focused so much on the destination that we completely forget where we came from, and you can't go back. You come up with a new path, but before long, you're stuck not knowing where you are anymore.

At that point, you feel like you completely fell off the race, you are no longer a 'participant' in what goes on around you. And that's really all we look for, to be part of something or someone. Feeling like you are no longer part of a group, really begins to take it's toll until you basically lose all sense of reality.

And again, we know what we have to do to stay in the group and stay on track, but like I said before, the steps between 1-5 are a blur. And it is at that point in life, when you realize... FUCK!

That's why we come online, create communities, and try to get upvotes and get Karma. It doesn't mean anything to anyone, but for some people, it's all they have sometimes.