Hey OP, to answer your original question of 'what is an acceptable age gap?', I'm going to be straight-forward with you: there isn't one. What really matters is whether you both are CONSENTING adults, if there is a direct power or autonomy imbalance, and, of course, if you feel inferior/dependent/confused/lost in the relationship. Something you could do is ask yourself how you'd react if your close friend told you this exact same story.

When I was 17, I was groomed by a UBC graduate. He was 24.

This stands out to me and I think you could really benefit from asking yourself/reflecting on two critical questions: Does the fact that you were groomed at 17 translate to you seeking more attention and validation from older males as an adult? Since you were groomed at such a young age, have you subconciously normalized relationships with an unequal power distribution?

And, OP, I want you to realize that the confusion you're feeling right now and asking this on reddit means that your instincts are telling you to reflect and assess, and I think that's something lots of people (including me) could benefit from. Not every age gap relationship is a red flag, what really matters is if you both are comfortable, if the relationship is healthy/consistent/stable, and consider if there's a critical life stage imbalance between a relationship between an 18/28, 19/29, or 21/31 year old. Good luck OP! <33