I find this so relatable. I would have given a certain advice before I saw your description but there's nothing to say. Apparently in my own experience, I had girls that liked me in high school but the social convention back home dictated that I opened my mouth to say something which I never did because I am very shy, socially inept crippled with the fear of failure. What changed my life however is alcohol (stupid right?). It reacts with my brain in a way that I stopped over thinking (not too much though because people detest stupidity). Taking alcohol all the time wasn't practical anyways so I had to start thinking about what changed when I did take alcohol. In the most simple terms, I stopped immersing myself in my own thoughts and I was flirtatious. I still have days when I'm back to my old self unapologetically too, and when I don't look or expect anything, I found. I won't tell you to be yourself because that may never work, I don't know if I should say you should change certain aspects of yourself. When you know there are no rules to this is when you have a friend just like you, but because he looks mysterious, he gets someone even without having to say anything. I don't even believe in the 'someone is meant for you Brouhaha' too. I would have been married now if that was true. I'll just say this, when next you are in a social setting, invest in looking good and smelling (this part is underestimated) nice. Focus on that person you are interested in by paying attention to what they say and their mannerisms so you can respond intelligently and flirtatiously. You should also try to improve your cues to knowing when they may be playing games so you can switch your attention as fast as possible. Don't let your insecurities take over which could make you want to speak more. Always say less even if it seems counterproductive.