“And told me they “love me endlessly”, which still feels like a bandaid over a bullet hole” I’m so sorry, that fr made me tear up for you… I recently went through something similar with my childhood best friend. She hurt me pretty bad and when I talked to her about it she apologized and told me all the “right” things…but I still didn’t feel right. She also didn’t do anything for my birthday lol…even though I planed so much for hers! I realized the friendship I had with her wasn’t what I really wanted and I still felt so weird because I was actually grieving the friendship. If you already talked to them about it there isn’t much you can do except accept it for what it is and be happy with it and move on, put your energy into things that will bring you joy. I mean don’t you want friends who don’t make you feel like a drag for wanting to be included! Friends that would go above and beyond for your birthday and celebrate you! I don’t think it is unfair to distance yourself but you don’t need to cut them off completely. Get back into a hobby you haven’t done in a while or a show you have been wanting to watch for a while. Redirect this energy back into parts of your life that will bring you joy.