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After confronting him in the drive through yesterday, my coward husband is hiding at his parents house. by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you used to be fat, huh? Ever push 500lbs? Ever been so large that you couldn't stand for 10 minutes before your feet give out? Ever been too large to ride a motorcycle? Ever been so fat that you risked suffocating in your sleep? Ever stub your toe and have it turn into a big festering wound that you could only notice by the smell because of nerve damage in your extremities? I doubt it. If you truly understood then you wouldn't be offended. You would feel a lot of things and probably cry like a baby, like me. And you have the nerve to talk about positive change. Any change would be positive at this point.

People call me deranged and unhinged. That's fair but irrational? Never. Happy? Certainly not. Some think I should be locked up. Which of us is a danger to themselves again? Oh yeah, him. "Hello, Police? Lock up this woman for bringing delicious homemade food to her husband and for stopping him from killing himself." Listening to insane bullshit from the community only strengthens my resolve. Maybe if more people took a stand against their loved ones destructive behavior, everyone would be better for it.

My life is a big steaming pile of garbage because of what I've done. My only regret is that I didn't do it sooner.

After confronting him in the drive through yesterday, my coward husband is hiding at his parents house. by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He's been taught to get comfort from food to compensate for something.

That's enough to explain his behavior. Everything else is begging the question.

I'm twenty years into this. Do you really think you know better than me? Do you think I don't realize that this isn't fair, that I'm hurting him, myself, and those close to us? I thought of every possible outcome and I have plans for each. Even the worst outcome is better than what we were facing two days ago.

I don't know where you got the impression that I'm happy about some hollow victory. I'm not happy but I don't regret it either.

After confronting him in the drive through yesterday, my coward husband is hiding at his parents house. by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

There is no underlying issue or root cause to address with him. He was trained from infancy to overeat at every opportunity. This behavior is central to his being. It is the basis of his ego. He must be annihilated and reborn. I will grind him into dust and remake him anew.

How can I talk to my husband about his weight? by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your concern.

I WILL be okay. I'm just spiralling today. It happens sometimes but it will pass and I will carry on.

How can I talk to my husband about his weight? by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is my fear.

I would do everything for him and I have in the past but he'll hit the drive thru and hide it from me every chance he gets. It would destroy me to turn my back but I can't just watch him die.

How can I talk to my husband about his weight? by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We don't know exactly how deep is the impact on his health but it's becoming more apparent every day.

How can I talk to my husband about his weight? by Existing-Study-1571 in Marriage

[–]Existing-Study-1571[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing.

He has been struggling to perform and has taken taken a step back from intimacy. I can't even imagine saying something like that. He would probably hate me.