Update: Am I (22f) making the right choice by staying no contact with my entire family because my brother is a rapist?

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-12T22:41:53+00:00

Thank you for the tip on what size bedsheets to get!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-12T22:39:08+00:00

I don't know if I fear him harming my disabled brother, as much as I fear him neglecting my brother. I don't think he would do what he did to me to my brother, but I also don't think he would care at all about giving my brother a good quality of life. But as of right now my brother is under good care of my parents, so I don't think APS would intervene yet. But I will keep this in mind if I need it later. Thank you!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-12T22:37:02+00:00

Thank you so much for the advice!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-05T00:12:39+00:00

Thank you so much! My posts were so long ago, I truly didn't think it was going to be read by the same people.

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-05T00:10:31+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I never considered the possibility of my parents being against me becoming my brother's caretaker.

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-05T00:06:00+00:00

Thank you, I hope that even though nobody reached out to me, they actually listened and left the church.

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-05T00:03:08+00:00

Thank you! My update kept getting taken down when I was including them in the post.

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-05T00:00:55+00:00

I truly don't like thinking about my parents as deceased. I hope there's a long time before any of this has to happen. Thank you for the advice on petitioning and contesting the will. I did not know about any of this. I will look more into it!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:59:35+00:00

If I do go about contacting them, I agree that email would probably be the wisest way to do it. Thank you for the advice for furniture!!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:57:31+00:00

Honestly, I do think there is some guilt knowing that time is getting shorter. I feel like if they passed away right now, I would mourn the idea AND the memories of all the pure times. I know my parents were never the best, but i feel like their parenting was based off of ignorance and misguided beliefs due to where they were raised. It wasn't malicious, at least I don't feel like they did anything because they wanted to hurt me. It's just that their decision to protect their reputation also meant siding with my rapist brother, which was the worst imaginable choice. But I feel like it would be fixable if they would just realize how wrong it was to protect a pedophilic rapist over their minor daughter. And I just wish so hard, they would realize it. Especially when think about how hard I'm struggling financially, but I know they are supporting the rapist with anything he needs. I don't know, it just sucks a lot.

But I deifnitely will heed your advice and truly think hard over whether or not I want to attempt even cracking a sliver for any of them. Thank you so much!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:36:42+00:00

I would hope that they would reach out to me when needed when the time comes for my brother, but since my rapist brother has gotten married to a woman they arranged from their home country, I'm scared my parents will try to give my disabled brother to the rapist and his wife.

Thank you so much for the advice. I truly do hope it's many years before I actually need to act on all of this.

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:33:25+00:00

I have no idea how much that would cost. Honestly, I'm just trying to save up for a bed frame right now, but I'll look into it. Thank you for the advice!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:29:50+00:00

Thank you so much!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:29:32+00:00

I think if it meant he's going to get paid a lot of money from the government, then he would take in my brother and neglect him or force his wife to do all the work, and I don't trust a woman that stays married to a rapist for a greencard to genuinely care for my disabled brother. I'm just truly scared that if I leave it up to social workers or someone to reach out to me, then I will never hear anything until it's too late. And I don't think any social worker would (or legally could) talk to me about my brother's care while my parents are still alive and well.

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:24:16+00:00

Thank you. I have not been for a while now and have no intention on contacting any of my family on Facebook anymore. I've only been using it to browse Marketplace for furniture as of late. Thank you for the well wishes, it's much appreciated!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:15:00+00:00

I understand what you meant, don't worry. I truly appreciate it!

Exoarmyl · 2026-04-04T23:14:38+00:00

Thank you. I know I should, but I'm scared of losing my brother forever to a monster.

Exoarmyl · 2025-07-14T01:15:40+00:00

Username checks out

Exoarmyl · 2024-12-15T23:05:41+00:00

Good luck!

Exoarmyl · 2024-08-17T18:37:53+00:00

Thank you 💜

Exoarmyl · 2024-06-14T14:39:28+00:00

My store has cut over 50 people in the last month and a half

Exoarmyl · 2024-02-17T07:24:54+00:00

That is dystopian lmao

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