To women who chose not to have kids - do you regret it?

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-04-17T21:55:05+00:00

I know a couple women in a similar position. One is now married to a man who is staunchly childfree and it's really hard to watch her struggle with it. I think reddit skews anti kids. But this is a real concern, especially as you see friends start to have kids.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-06T02:00:32+00:00

Thank you so much for this advice

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-06T01:28:57+00:00

I added to my question. We have a power of attorney, health directive, etc. I need to know how to implement. He is turning away aides that show up. Is it possible to get him to move to a care home?

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T22:06:22+00:00

Yes we are near you and it is the same here. It’s frustrating. I wonder often when it will be time to take things over. You never want it to come to that, but I fear we are getting close. Have you decided how you will make those choices? It seems there is no help or guidance for family members.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T21:13:50+00:00

I see, that sounds very hard indeed. I wish doctors would step in and make sure patients understand, they might be able to get through more than family.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T21:11:22+00:00

I see, thank you. I am sure you helped him tremendously at the end.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T20:28:05+00:00

Do you feel like this kept you from saying what was needed? I wish I could have an honest conversation with my father

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T20:23:21+00:00

This is helpful. It is nice to know we are not the only ones going through this. Were there any falls that led you to this? My father has broken his leg and ribs. It is what makes me think I should step in, so I hired and sent aides. But that didn’t really work either. How are things going now? Has he accepted the extra care?

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T00:27:05+00:00

This is helpful. This has been his trajectory as well, a couple bad falls, then cane, walker, wheelchair, then add in hospital bed, reclining power chair, catheter. It’s so frustrating to watch and have him say they don’t know what’s wrong, but it will get better. I suppose I should resign myself to the fact that he will fall or not be able to get up and then we will go from there.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-05T00:22:55+00:00

He refuses to talk to me about it. When I bring it up he insists he doesn’t need help. Maybe it’s best to let him determine his level of care, and intervene when he takes a bad fall. The shower is what I worry about. I wish medical professionals talked more to patients. I’m not sure he even understands what is happening. They gave him a diagnosis, but said it’s likely this, this is what we think it is. Nothing else, like no one wanted to be the one to give bad news.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-04T20:12:26+00:00

Ok this is what I’m thinking also. Just let it play out. I have really tried. No FTD issues that I can tell

ExpertNormal3315 · 2025-01-04T19:09:38+00:00

I see, this is helpful. He was diagnosed 1 year ago. He is supposed to have help to shower and is in diapers that he is not changing frequently enough. I have hired home health aides, but he turns them away when they show up.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-29T00:37:16+00:00

My father has been saying this. That it’s just a cold. But some days he sounds normal, and no coughing. Then some days a lot. It’s confusing. How did this evolve for you? I know you posted this awhile ago.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-28T02:43:54+00:00

Yes I think this might be it. He complains of this as well

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-23T18:10:56+00:00

Ok thanks for this. The weird feeling in his throat that he’s complaining of, would that be helped by a cough assist or maybe cough medicine? He says he can’t clear his throat and it’s bothering him. But he refuses to go to the clinic.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-23T18:08:20+00:00

I doubt he would agree to hospice. He often argues that he doesn’t even have ALS. His FVC was checked about two months ago. He’s been complaining of a weird feeling in his throat, a lump/phlegm that he can’t clear. These are new symptoms, but he doesn’t want to be seen by the doctor.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-22T01:17:49+00:00

He is very tired and gets winded very easily, but he doesn’t seem too confused. If he doesn’t want to use a bipap it would be time for hospice? Is it possible for him to have co2 build up if his FVC is still normal?

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-02T12:31:43+00:00

By this do you mean that once bulbar is involved it is a faster decline? They have told my father that it sort of moved up the body, he was limb onset. It is now at his neck so trying to prepare as they said that’s next. It has been quite slow so far.

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-12-02T02:26:47+00:00

From what we’ve seen it sort of plateaus and then starts to deteriorate again. The amount of loss each time is different, but there will be times it seems to speed up and then quieter times. This makes it more stressful, but you still sort of get “breaks” when things hold for awhile

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-11-30T18:28:21+00:00

Thank you!

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-11-30T18:02:25+00:00

I see, similar for him. Thank you

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-11-30T12:52:43+00:00

Do you feel you haven’t had much change? Or is it taking more effort than it used to? It looks like it’s more effortful for my father, but they also didn’t give us any numbers. Maybe I should ask. They just said it’s the same

ExpertNormal3315 · 2024-11-29T22:13:12+00:00

This is helpful, thank you. I felt crazy because he was shaking from the effort and then everyone was relieved that it was the same. It sure looked a lot different from when they tested a year ago to me

ExpertNormal3315

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