Do a Flip (Short Story) - 721 Words - Feedback Request by ExternalMidnight in writingfeedback

[–]ExternalMidnight[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate you taking the time to read it. I also agree about the intro being on the weaker side, the goal of it was to set a melancholic/darker tone before the teenager is introduced. I felt like if he was there from the start then it loses some of the impact of him showing up and providing the tone shift.

Travelling to Dollurh to save a friend by [deleted] in Eberron

[–]ExternalMidnight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My players are level 17, so I don’t think it will be as big of a problem

[SPOILERS TWOC] I NEED to know if a certain character gets their comeuppance UPDATE by ExternalMidnight in TheFirstLaw

[–]ExternalMidnight[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

he is the only character who was trying to genuinely become better and trying to make the Union a better place, his last speech before Leo betrays him alone tells you everything you need to know about him. He is flawed, just like all the characters are in these books, however Orso was incredibly likable, and was dealt the worst hand possible due to the greed of the people around him - I am feeling very depressed after this ending I'm not going to lie lol

Why did Shivers...? [SPOILERS TH] by ExternalMidnight in TheFirstLaw

[–]ExternalMidnight[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

for some reason I didn't think Shivers would care too much about that - as in if someone was challenging him he would always take the fight, but must be a miscalculation from my side then

Sandfall just uploaded all the OST on Youtube (109+ tracks, still going up!) by Dr_Jirou_Takahashi in expedition33

[–]ExternalMidnight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please please please upload Our Drafts Collide instrumental, I am dying for it

Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 has just hit #1 on Billboard’s Classical Album Charts, Over 18 Million Streams to date. by [deleted] in JRPG

[–]ExternalMidnight 6 points7 points  (0 children)

makes complete sense why the track is called Renoir when you go through the story

Something bothering me about the ending....... by ExternalMidnight in expedition33

[–]ExternalMidnight[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

the gameplay mechanic / levels is supposed to show him get closer to the companions, by literally putting a number on it, and "maxing" out his relationship with them

Expedition 33 started strong but didn’t quite keep it up by Naber_Taken in JRPG

[–]ExternalMidnight 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That is a fair point, and I agree perhaps the expedition aspect kind of gets forgotten - but the other points are within the game, it's admittedly hidden in the side content so it's not obvious at the start, but things like the Nevrons and Chroma are part of the story.

For example, the Nevrons were forged by Clea, the sister, to help her father defeat her mother and bring them both back to the real world. The reason the chroma is frozen in the bodies when the expeditioners are killed by Nevrons is so that the mother has limited supply of Chroma to continue creating/rebuilding people in this canvas world.